We've Learned to Run from Anything Uncomfortable

Thursday, May 26th

I pulled up to the school hoping to see at least a small trace of Sam for the second day in a row. I puffed madly on my cigarette, tightening my grip on the steering wheel as I put my car in park. I looked over at my passenger’s seat, where Sam had been sitting only two days ago.

I haven’t heard one word from her after she kissed me the other day. She hasn’t been at school, I tried calling her house, but I get no answer. I’ve almost got the courage to knock on her front door and ask about her, but I don’t want her throwing me into a category labeled stalker.

I can’t help but be extremely worried for her. I know that I dropped her off at the right time. We got there before eight o’clock and it was much too dark for her to be seen kissing me on the cheek. Besides, that’s hardly something to get mad at Sammy for.

Come to think of it, I couldn’t think of one legitimate reason to be irritated with Sam. She was a little quiet and closed off, but that was just a protection thing. Anyone could see right through that.

I put my thoughts aside, opened my car door and dropped my cigarette butt on the ground as I gathered my books and locked my car.

Every step towards school, I felt like I had lead in my feet and it was weighing me down, making me walk ten times slower than I usually do. My hand went limp and my books fell from underneath my arm, sliding in all different directions, as I lost my balance, falling down along with them.

I quickly clambered to my feet, looking around to see if anyone had seen me take a spill and chuckled to myself, amused by my sudden I care attitude. I picked up my books quickly and made my way inside, away from the cold air that was making me shiver.

I walked past Sam’s locker, and upon discovering she was once again missing, I bit my lip, twisting my lip ring around with my tongue and made my way into the cafeteria where I looked around, scanning the room for her long brown hair draped over her slightly slumped shoulders. I looked at feet, trying to see her sneakers somewhere. But, all I saw were pairs of high heels dancing towards me and expensive tennis shoes squeaking across the linoleum floor, trying to make it to class on time.

I sat there, through the shrill ring of the bell, a million horrible thoughts racing through my head. I slowly walked to class, my feet scuffing against the ground. I walked with my head down, and a chip on my shoulder.

It wasn’t like I was some love sick kid missing my girlfriend. Because, not only was Sam not my girlfriend, I wasn’t love sick; I was fucking worried. Two days Sam’s been missing. And she wasn’t answering my calls.

Its not like we are in a fight. She kissed me the other night, and I’m guessing that means that we are on good terms. Unless kissing in the US means something other than it does in the UK.

Nonetheless, my heart sunk even lower as I made my way into homeroom and sat down between LeeAnn and Carrie who gave me more news than I had wanted to hear.

“Oli!” LeeAnn whisper yelled.

I turned around, meeting her eyes and raised my eyebrow, not willing to exert enough energy to actually open my mouth and talk.

“Are you coming over Saturday?”

I shrugged my shoulders as I murmured, “I dunno.”

“Well, there is going to be a lot of alcohol.. And drunk girls.” She smirked.

“Brill.”

“Brill?” She asked stupidly, cocking her head to the side.

The way she was popping her gum, twirling her hair around her finger, and wiggling her foot made me want to hit her. But, when she titled her head slightly and said brill? in that stupid, little, questioning voice made me want to kick her ass halfway across the room.

“It means cool.” I muttered.

“Oh,” She grinned, “So, how are you?”

“Brill.” I stated, irritated and hoping she would leave me alone.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

I turned to face her, twisting my body in the desk. I placed my head in my hand and tilted my head at her, twisting the ring in the left side of my lip over and over again.

“Why do yeh an’ all the other birds at this school find the need to bother poor Sam?”

The hair twisting, gum popping, and stupid grin all stopped as she straightened up in her desk and her face took on an irritated sneer, "Why the fuck do you care so much about her?"

"You didn' answer meh question."

"Because. She's a little bitch. She gets on everyone's nerves and ever since sophomore year, she's decided she's better than every last person in this fucking town."

"Sophomore year?"

She smirked slightly, "You don't know shit about Sam, do you?"

"Like yeh do?"

"Sam used to be a fucking loser Oli. She'd run around, drunk all the time. Show up at school baked.. And she'd open her legs for anyone who asked. But ever since sophomore year, when we all found out the little cunt was adopted, she's turned into this Virgin Mary, and the most unholy thing she does is bring a cigarette up to her stupid little mouth." She sat back, and let a smile grace her lips, acting like she just rattled out a monologue for a part in the school play she already knew she was getting.

I narrowed my eyes at her, "Yeh're a god damn liar." I spat, grabbing my books and leaving the room as the bell rang.

She chased after me in the hallway and grabbed me by the arm, "You better be watching who you're calling a liar."

"Piss off!" I yelled, flipping her the bird as she walked away.

People stopped walking in the hallway and looked at me, seething, with steam pouring out of my ears cause I was so pissed off. I turned on my heel and walked until I came across Sam's locker. I banged my fist on it roughly and stood in front of it until the bell rang, making me late to yet another class.

-----------------

As I walked to my car at the end of the day, I'm not even sure how I made it through school. I threw my car door open and got inside, not skipping a beat as I lit my cigarette and backed out, almost slamming into the car behind me. I drove off quickly and made my way to the end of the parking lot and flying out into traffic.

I had suddenly gotten a mind blowing idea that might help me find out where the hell Sam has been.

I sucked in yet another deep, cheek-hollowing drag as I pulled up in front of Sam's house. I put out my cigarette in the cup holder and grabbed the beanie she had forgotten in my car for the second time.

As I sat in my car, contemplating on what to say, I ran back over what LeeAnn had told me today. It's not like I had something to be mad at Sam for, I never asked her about any of that stuff, but you'd think that's something you would tell someone.

We aren't best friends, but we are friends. Maybe I'm just pissed off because LeeAnn was trash talking Sam and she didn't deserve it. Needless to say, when I found myself rapping harshly on Sam's front door, I wasn't ready for what was about to answer it.

Sam answered the door, with a pair of baggy sweats covering her legs, her feet wrapped up in socks, and a big sweatshirt with the hood pulled on over her face. She kept her face down, not meeting my gaze as she pushed the screen door open.

"Yeh left this in meh car." I said, nervously, pressing the beanie into her hand, feeling the cold touch of her fingers as she gripped my wrist, digging her nails into it slightly, I pulled my hand back, "Jesus Sammeh. What the 'ell in wrong with yeh?"

"Oli." She whispered softly, "Get out of here."

"Sam?" I asked as she pulled her hand back and closed the screen door quickly, "Sam!"

She looked up quickly, and I caught a glimpse of her face, pale, with bruises covering it. Her bottom lip was busted open and her voice cracked as she snapped at me, "Get the fuck out of here, now Oli!"

She slammed the door in my face and I hit it roughly. I quickly turned my head, hearing the garage door open and I saw the haggard looking woman walk out with a glare on her face. I quickly made my way to my car and sped off in the direction of my house.

I'm not sure what the fuck is wrong with Sam. But, the fact that she had no cough, no nasally sound to her voice, and she didn't look one bit sick worried me. Knowing that she got beat by that bitch didn't help much either.

I threw myself through my front door and ignored Lynn's greeting as I stalked off to my room. I sat down on my bed and bit my lip, drawing blood.

Part of me wanted to know how in the fuck Sam had gotten such a hold on me when I'd only been here for two weeks.

But, a bigger part of me wanted to know if she was okay.