We've Learned to Run from Anything Uncomfortable

Thursday, June 9th

I scrambled around my basement, throwing clothes, books, and anything else I could think of into the closet. I wanted this place spotless. Sam was on her way over. Lynn helped me cook her dinner, well dinner for the both of us.

I quickly flicked a table cloth over the small coffee table and placed the vegetarian pizza in the middle of the table, setting drinks next to the plates and sliver ware. I had this great idea last night that I was going to redo our ‘first date’ I guess you could call it. I wanted it to be nicer than it was the first time, I wanted Sam to feel like she was important to me.

Which, she was.

I heard a soft knock at the front door and Lynn’s excited feet padding towards the front door. My stomach jumped and I made my way to the bottom of the stairs with a grin on my face.

"'E's down stairs Doll."

I heard Sam's feet come to the top of the stairs and I kept my eyes averted in her direction and she walked slowly, trying to keep her balance on the steep wood. Her feet came into view first, decorated by a pair of black converse, different from her usual foot wear. Her legs then came into view, a white skirt hung down to about an inch or so underneath her knee and she fully came into view, wearing a yellow t-shirt with a large sunflower decorating it.

Her hair was pulled into two braids resting on her shoulders and her eyes sparkled even in the dim basement light, an amused grin came upon her face as she saw me shuffling nervously at the end of the stairs. I saw her eyes dart over to the set table and the pizza that rested on top of it. Her face lit up dramatically and a small giggle sounded from her mouth.

"Good evenin’ Sammeh." I grinned.

"Oli!" She laughed, wrapping her arms around my neck and pecking my lips softly, "What is all this business?"

"Well. I jus' wanted teh do somethin' nice fer yeh." Before I leave you. I choked on my unspoken words trying to continue, "Why don' we eat?"

I guided Sam over to the table where we both took a seat across from each other on the floor.

"'M sorreh I don' 'ave any fancy chairs 'er anythin'."

She smiled picking up a piece of pizza, "I don't need fancy chairs."

"Did yeh 'appen teh know tha' yeh look amazin' tonigh'?"

I watched a small blush appear on her cheeks, "Shut up Oli."

"'M serious. Yeh look real nice."

"Well, thank you."

I nodded quickly, thinking about how I was supposed to keep myself together tonight. Sam looked beautiful. I’m talking gorgeous. Like when you’re walking down the sidewalk and that slight breeze throws a sunflower off balance, as it sways back in forth in the wind, and you just can’t tear your eyes away from it?

Yeah, that gorgeous.

“Well, this is great dinner conversation..” Sam said sarcastically.

"What's yer favorite thing abou' meh?" I grinned.

I watched her ponder for a second, putting down her pizza and taking a sip of her soda, "I like the fact that you're so brutally honest. You've never lied to me... Well at least that I know of," She grinned softly, "And you don't treat me like I'm going to break every ten seconds."

Honest? I couldn't even describe how horrid my stomach felt at that very moment, collapsing under the weight of my lies. I wanted to pass out and pronounce myself dead for being such a fucking prick. I wanted to scream my words out until my lungs ached and then cry into Sam's lap, telling her just how fucking sorry I was.

"What about you?" She asked, "What's your favorite thing about me?"

"Oi. Everythin' abou' yeh is meh favorite Sammeh. Yer gorgeous. And even though yeh 'urt sometimes, yeh still push through everythin'. Yeh may not try as hard to communicate with other's, but yeh don' back down and cry like most people do."

I couldn't help but feel like I was talking about myself.

"I think the only reason I'm able to communicate is because of you Oli." She said quietly, and just to add to the pile of guilt forming in my stomach, she continued, "There are a lot of things I do because of you Oli. I don't judge people so quickly anymore, and I give them chances to get closer to me. I could have written Marilyn and Marsha off, but I didn't, because after getting to know you, I know that not all people are going to hurt me and leave me behind, because whether or not I want to believe it, it's true. You've proven that to me."

Sometimes, like right now, I wish Sam would just shut the fuck up. All of a sudden, she's tuned into all her stupid fucking feelings, the ones that I pulled out of nowhere and now she's on this kick, like she has to talk about them all the time. And right now is definitely not a time where I want to hear it.

I'm tearing myself up inside, sitting across from Sam and knowing it's most likely the last time I'm going to see her.

I watch as she twirls a piece of hair around her finger over and over again, eyeing her half eaten pizza sitting on her plate and taking a small sip of her soda. She looks down at the skirt she is wearing, and flattens it out, she then looks up at me and through her long, brown hair, I can see her eyes looking straight at me as she grins.

“What are you looking at Oliver?”

"Nothin' Sammeh. Nothin' at all."

"You're looking at something!" She laughed, "You're staring at me like you want to bite me or something."

"Maybe." I grinned, moving myself from where I was sitting and crawling towards her, "It's 'cause I want teh bite yeh."

She quickly stood up, her skirt flying behind her as she giggled and ran across the room like a little girl. I made it to my feet and chased after her. Sam swiftly jumped behind the big screen TV and wound herself through the millions of cords, only to find me on the other side grinning like a mad man. She tried moving through to the other side.

But, it was no use. By the time she untangled herself from all the cords, I'd already made my way to the other side of the TV. I watched as she leaned against the wall and let her breathing steady, "I want to watch a movie."

"Well, yeh can't watch it hidin' back there."

"If I come out, you're going to get me!" She laughed.

"Oi Doll." I said, holding a hand to my chest, "Yeh don' want meh gettin yeh? Is tha' wha' yer sayin'?"

"Olllllllllleh!" I heard my Aunt Lynn yell.

"Wha' Lynn?"

"Tom's on the phone! Come talk to 'im!"

I looked at Sam, still trapped behind the TV, "Yeh're luckeh, Doll. I'm gonna go get the phone. Yeh better 'ave a movie picked out by the time I get back."

"And wha' are yeh gonna do if I don't?"

"I dunno. I'll figure it out on my way upstairs." I mused, kissing her on the cheek quickly.

I quickly climbed the stairs and met Lynn at the top. I grabbed the phone from her hand and pressed it against my cheek, my shallow breathing leaked into the receiver.

"'Ello Tom."

"Oi, Olleh. Yer comin' 'ome tomorreh!"

My mouth froze shut, "Wha' yeh mean 'm comin' 'ome tomorreh? I though' I was leavin' Friday!"

"Yeah, well mum couldn' wait teh get yeh 'ome."

"Fuck." I muttered.

"Wha'?"

"Look Tom, I gotta go. Me 'n Sam are watchin' a moveh."

"Lemme talk teh this bird!"

"Yeh best not say anythin' about meh comin' 'ome Tom. I'll 'ang yeh by yer nuts."

"Shut up Oliver. Yeh know I wouldn' do tha'."

I quickly tore down the stairs to see Sam sitting on the couch, picking at a string in her skirt.

"Oi, Love. Yeh didn' pick out a movie." I sighed, "Meh brotheh wants teh speak teh yeh."

"I don't know where your movies are." She said quietly, taking the phone from me and pressing it against her cheek, "Hello?... Yes, this is Sam... No," She laughed, "Me and Oli aren't screwing."

"God damn it!" I grunted, "Gimme the damn phone."

She handed it over quickly with an embarrassed grin on her face.

"Tom. I tell yeh, do yeh 'ave teh be such a twat?" I asked my now laughing sibling.

"I'm sorreh Olleh!"

I hung up on him, tossing the phone to the ground and sat down next to Sam on the couch, "Sorry 'bout tha'. Tom's a reject."

"It's alright." She smiled, "I think he was just messing around anyways."

"Idiot." I muttered, completely displeased with Tom. It was enough that he had to call and tell me I'm leaving tomorrow, but he also had to embarrass Sam. Asshole.

"Are you going to put in a movie?" She asked.

I looked down at her, admiring her sweet voice, "Oi. I dunno." I said, stretching, "I think yeh shoul' do it. I'm so tired!"

"Bull!" She giggled, turning to sit criss cross so she could face me.

"Or." I grinned, "Yeh coul' let me bite yeh now."

"Oh really?" She licked her lips discreetly and twisted her hands, "I guess you can bite me. As long as it's not too hard."

I stood up, leaning one arm against the side of the couch, I took one of her hands in mine, intertwining our fingers. I leaned down and breathed against her neck, "Is it alrigh' if I bite yeh here?" I said quietly. I felt her nod and I leaned down, placing my lips softly against the side of her neck at first and then nibbling on it a little bit.

I felt her giggle and I heard her legs slide down so that she was laying on the couch. I then moved my lips from her neck to her cheek, kissing it softly, moving along to her lips. She reached up with her free arm and pulled me down on top of her. I pressed my lips against her's again, kissing her softly at first, and then upon feeling her kisses harden and her tongue press against my lips, I opened my mouth and leaned into her a little more.

Sam's hands released from mine and I rested one on her hip, still moving my lips against her's. She pulled away quickly, breathing softly and kissed my cheek, running a finger down my neck. I felt her move her leg so that it was rested on top of my back, my body falling in between her legs.

The hand I had rested on her hip moved slightly, touching her thigh. I gradually moved it down, pressing my cold hand underneath her skirt and resting it on her naked thigh.

Goosebumps quickly rose on her skin and she pulled away from me. I moved my hand just as fast as I had put it there and she smiled, "Your hand is cold."

I put my hand back where it was, massaging her leg, moving it closer and closer to the edge of her panties. I shifted myself so that I wasn't laying completely on top of her, but almost to the side.

Her soft skin pressed against my hand, hot underneath my touch. My hand traveled up further and I rested it on the top of her lace underwear, sneaking my hand into the bottom of her underwear, I felt Sam go rigid, like she was scared. I pulled away from our kiss and looked at her, "Do yeh wan' meh teh stop?"

She simply shook her head no, wrapping a hand around the back of my neck and pulling me down against her once more. I felt myself harden as I pushed one finger inside of Sam.

Her kisses became hungrier and more desperate. She reached up and wrapped her hands around the hem of my shirt, pulling it up and over my head. I quickly broke away from the kiss and tried leaning back down when she too reached down and pulled her shirt up as well. She draped it across the couch, and wrapped her small hand around my unoccupied wrist, pulling me upwards.

I quickly moved up, kissing her more passionately than before. I wrapped one hand around her face and rested the other upon her bra.

She arched her back and reached behind it. With a flick of her wrist, both of her breasts fell out of her bra. My mouth moved away from her lips and retreated to her breasts where I kissed them softly and trailed a line of kisses down her stomach.

I touched the top of her skirt, pulling it down slightly. Again, she went rigid and I looked up at her, questioning her with my eyes. She shook her head softly, allowing me to continue.

I had gotten the top of her skirt down around her knees when we both heard the footsteps.

I looked up at Sam who had a horrified expression on her face. I quickly rolled off of her and she pulled her skirt up quickly. I watched as she scrambled to pull her bra on.

The foot steps became louder as they were coming closer to the basement.

"Oli!" She whispered loudly, motioning to the clasp on her bra.

I quickly pulled my shirt over my head and assisted her with hooking her bra back together. She pulled her shirt on and we both took a seat on the couch, breathing loudly and still completely horny.

I could tell by the way Sam was biting her lip and trying to ignore the fact that I was sitting right next to her with a fucking boner.

Lynn appeared at the bottom of the stairs, "Um, Sam. I jus' wanted teh let yeh know that 'ts 'bout eight o'clock. Olleh's got teh get up early tomorreh, so maybe yeh shoul' head home, alright sweetie?"

"Alright." Sam said breathlessly.

Lynn disappeared upstairs and I turned to face Sam who was obviously trying to keep her composure. Being unable to last much longer, she lunged at me, straddling me, pressing her lips against mine and not skipping a beat as her tongue slipped into my mouth.

"Sam!" I murmured against her lips, trying to get her off of me. She pursued her actions, wrapping her arms around my neck and leaning into me. I murmured again, “Sam.”

She ignored me, and continued kissing me roughly.

"Sammeh Doll." I urged, pressing against her shoulders.

"Jesus Oli!" She groaned pulling away and looking exasperated, "What?"

"I need teh get yeh 'ome." I mumbled.

I knew that if I didn't get her home soon, this would go a lot further than it was supposed to. It's bad enough I'm leaving Sam, she doesn't need to be heartbroken as well.

She looked upset, but stood up, "Why're you getting up early tomorrow?"

"I dunno." I lied, standing up, "I'm guessin' we're gonna take Mark out before he leaves on another business trip."

"Mark?"

"Meh uncle. 'E's always workin'." I said, placing a hand on the small of her back and guiding her up the stairs.

"Bye Sammeh!" Lynn yelled as Sam and I walked out the door. I slammed the door shut quickly, wanting to get this good bye done and over with.

"Jesus Oli. I was going to say good bye to her." Sam said irritably.

I ignored her, pulling open the passenger's side door and letting her in. I then crossed the front of the car and got in. The air was a bit brisk, but nowhere near as bad as Sheffield was going to be. I sighed loudly, pressing my keys into the ignition.

The drive to Marilyn's was quite a bit longer than the drive to Mary's. Sam and I both stayed silent the whole drive there.

I wasn't sure what Sam was thinking, but I was still bouncing from the idea of telling Sam, to just keeping my mouth shut. I didn't want to leave in a fight, or leave knowing I made Sam cry. If I leave her the way she is now, I'll remember her as the smiling Sam, happy to just be with me.

"Oli." Sam muttered, "You missed the turn."

"Well sorreh!"

I quickly turned into the next street and turned around, pulling into the other side of the road. I made a rough left turn and drove down Sam's street, searching for her house.

"Its right here!" She said suddenly.

I screeched to a halt.

"God, what is wrong with you? You were just fine like ten minutes ago."

What was wrong with me?

Well Sam, I'm dropping you off at your house after our hanging out tonight and this is the last fucking time I'm going to see you. I'm going to miss the fuck out of you, and right now I'm scared to imagine life without you. As stupid as this may sound, I know that I've only been around you for a few weeks, which is not enough time at all to fall in love with someone and build a strong relationship but, I honest to God think I love you.

"Nothin'." I sighed.

"Well fine. I guess I'll see you later then." She spat, throwing open her door and getting out. Sam slammed the door roughly, and I took it as my last chance.

I quickly pulled my keys from the ignition and opened my door, following Sam. I caught up to her in her front yard and grabbed her arm, pulling her to face me. It took all I could not to cry.

"What Oli?"

"'M sorreh. 'M just really tired righ' now. I didn' sleep well, an' with school bein' over, 'm worried that 'm not gonna be able to find a good college."

I almost buckled under the weight of my lies, but I couldn't bring myself to tell Sam the truth.

"We-"

Before she could start her sentence, I wrapped my arms around her small waist and kissed her softly. No open mouth, no tongue, just a soft peck. I then leaned my head against her shoulder, trying to suffice my tears. I looked at her, thankful it was getting dark and muttered softly, "I love yeh Sam."

"Oli. We've only known eachot-"

"I know Sam. An' I am almost positive tha' I love yeh. I've fallen in love with yer sarcastic attitude, yer caring, and I've realized tha' yeh're startin' to change, become a better person. Only in three weeks. I love yeh." I said quietly, brushing the hair from her face and trying to keep my voice from wavering, "Yeh're an amazin' person. You remember that, okay?"

I placed my lips against her cheek again, letting them linger. I then pulled away and wiped my face.

"Are you crying?"

"No." I replied quickly, "Meh eyes itch."

"Well. I have to tell you something."

I shoved my hands in my pockets and looked down at my feet. I moved a rock with the tip of my shoe before asking, “Wha’s tha’?”

"I love you too."

A smile brought itself to my face and even more tears leaked from my eyes. I pulled Sam close to me, breathing in her soft scent of vanilla, almost tasting it. I pulled away and held her at arm's distance, admiring her, not wanting to forget any part of her.

"Good Lord Oli. You're acting like you're never going to see me again." She laughed.

"Yeah." I grinned nervously, "'M bein' a freak."

I leaned forward, kissing her one last time, muttering "I love yeh." again.

"I love you too Oli."

"Bye Sam." I said quietly, walking back to my car and letting myself in.

No longer had I made it to the end of the street, my face was covered in tears and I could hardly keep my composure, sobs attacking my throat.

I pulled over on the side of the road, hitting the steering wheel roughly, my hands throbbing, "God!" I screamed out in frustration, "Fuck!"

I leaned back in my seat and let the tears fall.

Once again, I'm left wondering how in the fuck I fell so hard for Sam in only three weeks, but I’m more concerned about the fact that I have to live without her.