Forget Me Not

THREE

It was about 5am when the doctor came back. Frank knew that he was tired, but every time he closed his eyes he could see Gerard, and that’d normally jolt him awake.

Mikey had fallen asleep about an hour ago, his head rested on Franks shoulder. When Frank saw the doctor, he jostled his shoulder which caused Mikey to wake up with a whimper and a jolt.

“Have you slept?” the doctor asked Frank. Frank just shrugged, because really, he didn’t know. The doctor frowned slightly but carried on talking.

“Mr Way is still unconscious but we were able to stabilise his condition. We were also able to successfully repair the puncture in his lung,”

“Do you know what happened yet? What caused the accident?” Mikey asked.

The doctor cringed. “Drunken driver; apparently he was on a suicide run, figured it’d be easier to do it drunk,”

“What happened to him?”

“He was lucky, only cuts and bruises. But he was wearing a seat belt. The extent of Gerard’s injuries could be down to the fact that he wasn’t wearing a seatbelt,”

Upon hearing this, Frank snapped. “Oh yeah, lucky. My fiancé – who doesn’t even drink alcohol anymore could have died because this lunatic was drinking. Why is it that he gets off scot-free while Gerard has to fight for his life?!”

“Mr Iero, I can assure you that he’ll not get off lightly for this,”

“Better than Gerard,” Frank cried, practically being held back by Mikey.

“I know this must be difficult for you to take in...”

“You don’t know shit,” Frank interrupted, staring the doctor down, before looking at Mikey sympathetically. “I need a smoke,”

He turned on his heel and walked out of the front entrance, pulling a packet of cigarettes from Gerards jacket pocket, and lit one up, inhaling deeply and desperately and watching the sun rise over the large New York business buildings.

His mind kept ticking over to what the doctor had said about Gerard not wearing his seatbelt. He chocked back a sob as he thought back to a conversation that took place only two months ago, the pair were blissfully unaware of how significant it’d later be.

“That’s so sad,” Frank muttered.

“What is?” Gerard said as he walked into the living room from the kitchen with two cups of tea.

“This,” Frank gestured to the television. “A family died in a car accident while on holiday. There was a kid of only like...seven years old in there.”

Gerard bit his lip and placed the mugs on the coffee table. He knew how Frank got about stories like that. He sat on the couch next to his fiancé and put his arm around Franks shoulders, pulling him into his chest. “It’s okay, baby,” he whispered.

“No it’s not...seven Gee. That’s twenty years younger than me...and I don’t think I’m old or anything...”

Gerard didn’t know what to say in these situations, because Frank was right, it wasn’t okay. It was never okay for people to die so young.

“Just promise me something, yeah?” Frank asked sitting up straighter, brushing his fingertips along Gerard’s chest, pushing under the collar of his shirt.

“Of course, anything,”

“You insist on driving that stupid car all the time...but promise you’ll always wear a seatbelt...” he bit his lip. “That sounds stupid but—”

“No, I get it. I promise.” He leant forward and pressed his lips gently to Franks.

Frank sighed and pushed his cigarette into the ground next to him, leaving it there to fizzle out on the wet cement. He was vaguely aware of the dampness soaking into his jeans, but he didn’t even feel awake or even human at this point, so he made no attempt to move.

While he was desperate to know exactly what was going on with Gerard, he knew that at least he had hope. He knew that the moment he found out the worst, all hope would be gone, and he’d wished he’d never known. It was a confused mess inside his head and the lack of sleep wasn’t helping.

What he couldn’t get his head around though was the fact that Gerard had broken his promise. It was common knowledge enough to wear a seatbelt, but Gerard never broke his promises to Frank.

The only reason he could chalk it up to was that Gerard was probably less than a minute from home, so he didn’t think he’d need it. It had to be about a one in a million chance that it would have been Gerard to get injured so close to home. It wasn’t fair.

He stood slowly and walked back into the waiting room where Mikey was back in one of the plastic chairs, chewing on his nails. A nervous habit that both Way brothers shared.

“Maybe we should go home or something?” He suggested. “I mean, get some sleep, a wash and some food? You look exhausted, Frankie,”

“I’m fine,” Frank answered rubbing at his eye. “If I sleep, then I’ll fall asleep here, but I’m not going home. I ca—I can’t.” Gerard would be everywhere.

Mikey frowned a little, but didn’t push the matter further.

“I might head off for a bit...” Mikey said then, biting his lip. “If that’s okay?”

“Hey man, no, it’s cool. You don’t need to ask my permission. You should probably go fill Alicia in on everything, no doubt she’ll be worrying,” Frank smiled reassuringly.

“I won’t be long. I’m just gonna go see Alicia and shower and eat, all the basics. Call me if you hear anything.”

Frank nodded and stood to hug Mikey before he left, and then he was alone again.

The clock on the wall ticked, and Frank could hear the general noise of the hospital, phones ringing, voices, people talking and the occasional ambulance siren. Frank hadn’t thought properly since he got here. Nothing seemed real. It didn’t seem right that Gerard was alone and unconscious somewhere in this hospital and somewhere in New York their car was mangled and destroyed, the evidence of Gerards injuries everywhere.

His stomach growled angrily, protesting from emptiness. Frank knew he was hungry, but he couldn’t risk the Doctor coming out to tell him that Gerard had woken up while he wasn’t here. He needed to be here all the time.

The city was fully awake when a Doctor Frank didn’t recognise came into the waiting room calling his name. Frank stood up and introduced himself routinely.

“Listen,” he sighed out, his voice raw from all of the tears that he’s put at bay. “I don’t know who you are, but I can only assume that you’re taking over from the night doctor who was looking after Gerard last night. I...I can’t change shifts, y’know?” He croaked. “I-I’ve been here all night, all night with only a cup-a-fuckin’-soup and two cigarettes, too afraid to walk out of the entrance and I’ve heard n-nothing. Nothing. It’s killing me! Please, just let me see him.”

The Doctor wavered, and then said, “Come with me, Mr Iero.”

Frank jerked and looked up at the doctor. “We’re going to see him?”

“I...No. I’m sorry, but conversation like this is better behind closed doors.”

Franks blood ran cold. He didn’t make it. He didn’t make it, and they need to tell me in some stuffy doctors office so I don’t make a scene in the waiting room.

“Please take a seat, Mr Iero.” the doctor said gesturing to a leather arm chair facing a large oak desk, which the doctor was seated behind. Frank did as he was told, and stretched his fingers across the leather, listening to the satisfying squeak it made under his fingertips. “How are—” The doctor began.

“Cut the crap,” Frank interrupted, eyeing the doctor slowly before letting his eyes drift around the room. The name plaque on the desk read Dr Collins, and there were certificates and awards dotted around the room, on the wall, standing on bookshelves all framed in his honour. Frank looked back to his desk, and noticed a picture of him and a woman, Frank linked that to the ring on his finger, assuming he was married. “If your wife,” Frank hesitated, gesturing to the picture, “was in the same position as my husband, would you want people to pansy around and ask bullshit like ‘how are you’ when it’s plainly obvious how I am, or would you just want to know what’d happened?”

Franks voice stayed calm and even the entire time. It didn’t even waver all that much.

Dr Collins’ mouth pinched into a thin line and he sighed. “Point taken, Mr Iero.” He then started shuffling through some papers, opening up and file and glancing back at Frank. “It appears that upon impact, Mr Way’s caused substantial damage to his temporal lobe,” Frank stared at him. “The temporal lobe is the part of your brain which controls things such as emotional response, memory, hearing and speech.”

“So...?”

“We can’t know until Mr Way wakes up, but he may struggle with one or more of these areas,” he hesitated. “Most commonly in situations like this, it’s memory loss.”

Franks stomach dropped. He could almost feel his heart in his mouth and his tongue felt far too big. “M-Meaning what?” He choked out.

“As I said, Mr Iero, we can’t know the full extent of his injury until he wakes up, but if it is his memory that suffers, it is possible that he will no longer have any of his basic memories, who people are, where he grew up, even in some cases, his likes and dislikes. It may be possible though, that he remembers basic things like communication skills, and maybe even certain objects etcetera since knowledge and memory are two different things entirely.”

“Oh, well, that’s all well and good, isn’t it,” Frank snapped, his eyes welling up. “I’m supposed to be marrying him in six days, but now, he doesn’t even remember who I am!”

“As previously stated, Mr Iero, we can’t know the extent of Gerard’s injury until he wakes up. In the mean time, you should probably go home, get some rest.”

“What? No way. I want to be here when he wakes up—”

“Mr Iero—”

“He’ll want to see me, he—”

“He might not remember who you are.” The doctor cut in firmly and Frank winced. “We will call you as soon as he wakes up, but there’s no need for you to stay here if he won’t remember you.”

And Frank nodded. His mouth was pulled into a tight line and his eyes were welling up. His throat was thick and he could feel the makings of a sob building up. He didn’t say anything as he stood up and walked to the door, he didn’t even look back at the doctor, he didn’t think he could.

He waited until he was outside, standing where he had for his morning cigarette, before he collapsed to the floor, and let everything out.
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Ohmygosh you guys. I don't know if you'd believe me if I tried to tell you how hard this story is to write. It's like...I've got to get facts right, and emotions right, and reactions right and it's like *BRAINMELT!* So...all the factual stuff might be a little (OR VERY) off, but the story isn't so much about that anyway....so is that cool with you guys?
I'm not sure how long it'll be until the next chapter, because I've gone against everything I believe in, in writing and posted this before the next chapter has even been started...but yeah, it'll be posted at some point.

If anyones interested, theres a one-shot that I wrote while trying to clear writers block for this story, and I posted it. Saying Goodbye. It's pointless but a little cheerier than this.
Thanks for your comments, I love you all.