Harry Cotter and the Philosopher’s Brothel.
Bats Or Newts?
“Shit!” Harry woke up with a start, to see an empty room “RON! WAKE UP! WE OVERSLEPT” He rolled out of bed, smashing his head on the bedside table, cursing a little more, as Ron rolled over
“What sweetums?”
“Sweetums?”
“I…erm…mean…Harry!”
“It’s 9! We overslept! We’re meant to be in potions now!”
“Holy Fuck”
Both boys pulled on their clothes, grabbed their books and legged it down to the basement., where Snarp had already began his lesson:
“Memory Loss Potion. Page 325. Test it on a friend. They won’t know about the next 30 minutes. Go”
One small section of Gryffinwankers and one small section of Slitherapists, were merged to form one class: the class that Harry and Ron burst into 10 minutes late.
“HAROLD! RONALD!”
“What the fuck? Harold?” someone sniggered
“Silence. I don’t care if you’re a ‘celebrity’” Snarp growled at the word “it’s no excuse to be late. And Ronald, well, just because you’re sleeping with him, doesn’t mean you can be late”
“THERE’S ONLY 4 BEDS!” Ron protested, scraping a bit of dry eyeliner out of the corner of his eye.
“Pfft. Go work over there somewhere, and let me continue my lesson”
Snarp made his way over to the front of the class, stepping up onto a small stage like box behind a table, scattered with bottles.
“The potion will make the drinker appear drunk, and they will have no conscious memory of half an hour after they drink it. It shall take 10 minutes to make”
Both Harry and Ron had forgotten their books, and in a haste mixed together bottles that others appeared to be using, unaware that they were one wrong ingredient away from a love potion.
“Bats or Newts?”
“Bats” Mi whispered from the next cauldron over
“Newts it is”
“But I said Bats!”
“Like we trust you!” Ron smiled, added the newt and watching the potion turn pink, a small red heart circling.
“I guess we better try it” Harry gulped, dipping two glasses into the mixture, drinking his back in one “well…I’m still alive”. Ron drank his, feeling fine, except for the bulging erection in his underwear, which he tried to hide with his cape.
With both boys still focusing on their penis problems, neither noticed Draco slipping memory loss potion into their drinks, which he knew they must finish off before Snarp came and saw; and that’s what happened.
The next 30 minutes were a blur, and as Harry woke up stark naked in a small cupboard, he didn’t remember anything, not even when he saw another figure hunched in the corner, recognisable by ginger hair.
“RON! What the hell happened?” Harry shook his awake
“I don’t know, but I’m covered in this white…fuck!”
“Silence or someone’ll hear you” a voice groaned from by the door
“PROFFESEUR SNARP”
“Now boys, we shall never speak of this moment again, or I’ll turn you into girls”
“But what happened?” Ron whined
“Oh, something quite spectacular” Snarp smiled, fiddling with his clothes, before leaving the two naked boys wondering what really had happened between them and the moody potions teacher.
“What sweetums?”
“Sweetums?”
“I…erm…mean…Harry!”
“It’s 9! We overslept! We’re meant to be in potions now!”
“Holy Fuck”
Both boys pulled on their clothes, grabbed their books and legged it down to the basement., where Snarp had already began his lesson:
“Memory Loss Potion. Page 325. Test it on a friend. They won’t know about the next 30 minutes. Go”
One small section of Gryffinwankers and one small section of Slitherapists, were merged to form one class: the class that Harry and Ron burst into 10 minutes late.
“HAROLD! RONALD!”
“What the fuck? Harold?” someone sniggered
“Silence. I don’t care if you’re a ‘celebrity’” Snarp growled at the word “it’s no excuse to be late. And Ronald, well, just because you’re sleeping with him, doesn’t mean you can be late”
“THERE’S ONLY 4 BEDS!” Ron protested, scraping a bit of dry eyeliner out of the corner of his eye.
“Pfft. Go work over there somewhere, and let me continue my lesson”
Snarp made his way over to the front of the class, stepping up onto a small stage like box behind a table, scattered with bottles.
“The potion will make the drinker appear drunk, and they will have no conscious memory of half an hour after they drink it. It shall take 10 minutes to make”
Both Harry and Ron had forgotten their books, and in a haste mixed together bottles that others appeared to be using, unaware that they were one wrong ingredient away from a love potion.
“Bats or Newts?”
“Bats” Mi whispered from the next cauldron over
“Newts it is”
“But I said Bats!”
“Like we trust you!” Ron smiled, added the newt and watching the potion turn pink, a small red heart circling.
“I guess we better try it” Harry gulped, dipping two glasses into the mixture, drinking his back in one “well…I’m still alive”. Ron drank his, feeling fine, except for the bulging erection in his underwear, which he tried to hide with his cape.
With both boys still focusing on their penis problems, neither noticed Draco slipping memory loss potion into their drinks, which he knew they must finish off before Snarp came and saw; and that’s what happened.
The next 30 minutes were a blur, and as Harry woke up stark naked in a small cupboard, he didn’t remember anything, not even when he saw another figure hunched in the corner, recognisable by ginger hair.
“RON! What the hell happened?” Harry shook his awake
“I don’t know, but I’m covered in this white…fuck!”
“Silence or someone’ll hear you” a voice groaned from by the door
“PROFFESEUR SNARP”
“Now boys, we shall never speak of this moment again, or I’ll turn you into girls”
“But what happened?” Ron whined
“Oh, something quite spectacular” Snarp smiled, fiddling with his clothes, before leaving the two naked boys wondering what really had happened between them and the moody potions teacher.