I'll Wait Here for You in My Time of Dying

Lyndsey’s hands were flapping about above her head as she explained to Brian what had happened today at the cemetery. When we had got back to mine, we discovered that all the guys and their girls were now there. Sarah immediately ran over to Jason and began to babble about what had happened, making him chuckle a little before he told her to slow down and start again. Brian freaked out when he noticed his wife unconscious in my arms.

I’d explained that she was fine and had laid her down on one of the couches, having to bat Jimmy away from her when he tried to poke her awake.

Everyone then listened to Sarah explain about Lesia, every so often looking over at me as if we’d all gone insane. But with Taylor backing Sarah up, there wasn’t much room for them to argue with them. The moment Lyndsey woke up, she began to tell Brian about what had happened.

“Baby,” Brian chuckled a little and took her arms in his hands. “What the fuck did you lot take together?”

Lyndsey grumbled and crossed her arms over her chest.

“Don’t give me that mister,” she growled quietly. “I never believed in this sort of shit before. This was Sarah territory and when she told me about the ‘ghost’ in Matt’s house, I presumed that they’d gone insane. But they haven’t. I fucking saw her!”

“So explain again who she is,” Rhian commented as she snuggled into Jimmy’s side.

“She lived her a few years ago,” I explained. “But was killed during a burglary here.”

“And she is still waiting for her fiancé to come back like he said he would,” Sarah finished as she sat herself down on Jason’s lap. “But he died whilst serving in the army, like ten days after she did.”

Everyone was silent for a while and I could tell that they were all contemplating what I’d said.

“This is fucking cool,” Raychel grinned.

I chuckled as Zacky looked at her as if she was insane.

“Cool?” He questioned incredulously. “You think it’s cool that half our friends have gone completely bat shit crazy?”

I rolled my eyes and looked down at Taylor as she giggled quietly. I tugged her closer to me and smiled as she looked up at me before she leant up a bit and kissed me. I kissed back, ignoring the mild arguments that were erupting between everyone else. My hand curled around her neck as the kiss deepened and I realised something.

For the first time since everything happened with Ashley, I felt alive.

Lesia’s P.O.V

I smiled as I loitered in the doorway of Matt’s living room. It was quite funny watching Lyndsey try and fight her corner, not wanting to seem completely insane. Some of their friends seemed to believe them, Raychel was quite excited by the idea. But most of them were rather sceptical, something that I completely understood.

If I was in their shoes, I’d probably be a little suspicious too.

I looked over at Matt and smiled as I saw the way he was with Taylor. You could see the life that had been taken from him by Ashley was finally back. He was so happy and I couldn’t have been happier for him. I felt a tear trickle down my cheek as I watched them for a few more minutes.

This was what I wanted again. I wanted to be in a room full of people, knowing that I belonged and knowing that I was loved.

Or I wanted to have moved on from this world.

I still hated this limbo that I was stuck in.

I thought that knowing Tyler was dead would mean that I would move on but I was still here. So maybe I did have to move on from the fact that he was dead. But would that even be possible? How do you get over the death of the person who you had given your heart to? He had meant the world to me and he had died and I hadn’t even known.

That was something I didn’t think I’d ever be able to get over.

I had always thought that Tyler and I would grow old together, that it wouldn’t be for another sixty odd years that I would have to say goodbye to him.

As I watched Matt, I realised that I’d never have that. I’d never grow old with someone. I’d never get married. I’d never have children...I’d never be with Tyler ever again.

I sniffed and brushed away my tears, swallowing as more and more threatened to fall. I wrapped my arms around my body and leant against the doorframe.

“Whether you believe us or not,” Sarah spoke up, successfully quietening down the room. “We’ve got Lesia to thank for a lot of things.”

I straightened up as I heard her say my name and looked over in question, not knowing if she could see me at this point or not.

“How so?” Mattie asked.

“If it wasn’t for Lesia, Matt would never have phoned me,” Taylor commented and looked over to where I was and smiled. “I probably wouldn’t be with Matt if it wasn’t for her.”

I smiled and bit my lip as Taylor grinned over at me.

“If it wasn’t for Lesia, Matt would probably still be just drifting through life,” Lyndsey commented, shrugging a little. “Even Sarah and I couldn’t get him to leave the house for long periods of time.”

“Lesia...helped me find life again,” Matt voiced and looked over to me, sending me a wink that would have had me blushing if it was possible.

The boys all looked at him before Johnny snorted quietly.

“Okay, pansy.”

Matt grumbled and went to throw a cushion at him but I beat him to it. I picked up the cushion that was by me and lobbed it at Johnny’s head, grinning as Matt, Taylor, Sarah and Lyndsey all burst out laughing whilst the others all looked confused.

“Fuckers,” Johnny grunted. “Who did that?”

I smiled and looked over to Matt. He mouthed ‘thank you’ over at me and I knew it wasn’t just because I’d hit Johnny in the head with a cushion. I knew he was thanking me for everything. I wanted to say something in return and I went to. I knew he could see me at this point and I went to mouth my own ‘thank you’ to him but before I could, pain rushed through my body.

I gasped and closed my eyes, not understanding how I could feel pain when I was already dead. I opened my eyes and found that the house was completely dark and that I was somehow upstairs. My brow furrowed as I listened out for Matt and his friends but I couldn’t hear them anymore.

I looked around the room I was in and realised I was in Matt’s bedroom but there was something wrong. I reached for the light and switched it on, noticing how the room was decorated as I had had it when I was living here...when I was living. I walked over to the wardrobe and peered into the mirror, sucking in a breath when my reflection met me.

My head snapped over to the doorway as I heard something crash downstairs and walked over to the door, peaking my head out to see if I could find out what it was. I took a deep breath and quietly made my way over to the stairs, noticing that there was a light on in the kitchen.

I was sure I’d turned that off.

I was stunned by that thought that went through my head, seeing as I didn’t live here anymore and didn’t have control of the lights. That was all down to Matt. But something inside of me told me that things weren’t as they were a few minutes ago.

I began to walk down the stairs, regardless of how much my gut instinct was telling me not to. I glanced down and managed to miss the creaky step before quickly descending the rest of the stairs. I could hear Tyler’s voice in my head telling me that I was too curious for my own good and telling me to get back up those stairs but I didn’t listen to him.

I kept on going, skirting around the walls and keeping myself pressed into the shadows so I could see who was in my kitchen. I stepped forward just as the shadow from my kitchen stepped out and we both froze. His eyes went wide and I felt myself freeze. I wanted to run back upstairs, to lock myself in my bedroom and to phone someone for help but I couldn’t. I just stood there. If I’d moved, like any other sane person would have, then I would have probably gotten away.

I would have probably survived that night.

The shadow darted backwards and grabbed something off of the surface in the kitchen before running towards me. I screamed as I felt the sharp metal pierce my stomach, the hissing pain from that night burning through my veins.

Matt’s P.O.V

I shot to my feet as a scream echoed through my house, noting how everyone else jumped as well. I did a quick head count of the room but in my gut I knew who it was. My blood ran cold as I waited a couple of seconds. I felt someone hold onto my hand and looked at Taylor, her eyes wide with worry.

Together, we slowly walked out of the living room, Taylor’s grip on my hand tightening with every step that we took. We didn’t have to go far in order to find what out what had happened. One step out of the living room had us facing something I’d never thought I’d ever see in my life.

“Fuck,” Taylor half whimpered and half breathed.

She took her hand away from me and I tore my gaze away from Lesia and looked at my girlfriend, seeing the way she backed herself up with both her hands over her mouth. I looked back at Lesia, not believing that I was watching her blood pool across the floor.

“Lesia?” I whispered and stepped closer to her.

She opened her eyes and looked over at me before gasping and putting both her hands down to her stomach. She lifted them and cried out as she saw the blood on her fingers. Just that heartbreaking sound made me want to hold her in my arms. I sank down to my knees beside her and tentatively reached out to her, even though I knew that my hand would just sink through her.

My eyes widened as my fingers touched her shoulder, feeling the warmth of her skin and the tremor of her body beneath my touch. I shook off my shock quickly and didn’t hesitate to bring her into my arms, holding her tightly as she cringed slightly and looked up at me again.

“Matt...” Lesia breathed, pausing as she winced. “As strange as it sounds...I think I’m dying.”

I huffed out a humourless laugh as Lesia smiled a little.

“What happened?”

She shrugged as best she could. “I was just watching all of you and I went to tell you thank you...for letting me into your life and for helping me to find out about Tyler and everything...and I was suddenly upstairs. But it was like I’d gone back. I...I...”

She took a deep breath, one that shouldn’t have shuddered but it did. It was as she had said...it was like she was dying all over again.

“It was just like the night I died,” she admitted. “Everything that happened and everything that I felt that night.”

“Oh my God,” was rushed out behind me.

I didn’t need to look to know it was Lyndsey and I didn’t need to know to know that everyone was probably crowded in the living room door.

“I think...I’m finally moving on,” Lesia smiled up at me.

I smiled down at her, all be it rather watery, and swallowed.

“Thank you,” I told her. “For everything you’ve done for me.”

Lesia scoffed but winced a little. “It was all you Matt. I just gave you a gentle nudge.”

I chuckled and nodded, moving a hand up to brush some of her hair away from her face. I watched as life seemed to fade out of her eyes, her skin beginning to pale as her body slowly went limp.

“At least...” she broke off as a cough came up, blood trickling out from the corner of her mouth. “At least this time I’m not alone.”

She looked up at me fondly before her eyes fluttered closed and her body shook with one last breath. As I stared down at her, her body began to fade until I was staring down at the floor and my legs that were spread out in front of me.

You wouldn’t have guessed that anything had just happened. There was no blood.

There was nothing.

2 years later...

I chewed my lip as I looked down at the headstone in front of me, my eyes moving across the letters that had been etched in five years ago. I crouched down and laid a bouquet of flowers against the grave, straightening up and smiling as I felt a breeze swirl around me. I looked down as someone took hold of me, their little arms winding around my leg as they kept themselves on their feet. Her bright hazel eyes stared up at me in wonder, a smile splitting her features as she held up one hand to me.

“Daddy,” she grinned.

I chuckled and scooped her up in my arms, blowing a kiss against her cheek and making her squirm in my arms. She giggled and threw her arms around my neck, holding herself close to me as she looked down at the headstone I’d previously been staring at. I heard puffing behind me and looked over my shoulder, chuckling as my fiancé stopped a few feet away from us and bent over double, her hands on her knees as she tried to get her breath back.

“Okay,” Taylor decided as she straightened up. “I just got out crawled by a fifteen month old. I need to get to a gym.”

I smiled as Taylor smiled sheepishly and walked over to us.

“I’m sorry. I tried to keep her with me so you could have some time by yourself but,” Taylor shrugged as she poked our daughter on the nose, causing giggles to erupt from her. “Lesia is a little bit mischievous at the moment. And refuses to stay still.”

“No,” Lyndsey piped up with as she appeared beside Taylor. “Lesia refuses to be away from her dad.”

I grinned proudly as the rest of our group finished walking up to the grave.

“What can I say?” I voiced as I looked down at my daughter. “She’s a daddy’s girl.”

Taylor rolled her eyes before wrapping her hands around one of my arms and kissing my cheek gently.

“Love you,” she muttered.

“Love you too,” I replied and kissed her quickly.

“You ready to go Matt?” Sarah asked quietly.

I nodded and cleared my throat as I glanced down at the headstone once more, hearing the sound of everyone walking away except for Taylor. Lesia squirmed in my arms so I put her down on the floor, keeping an eye on her as she pushed herself to her feet and began to walk towards the headstone. She grinned as she reached it, her little hands splaying against the stone and the fingers of one hand dipping into the L that was engraved into the stone.

She rested her cheek against the cold marble and moved a little closer to it, almost as if she was giving the headstone a hug. I smiled as she left a loud and sloppy kiss against the marble before scooping her up in my arms.

“I’m not sure how I feel about my daughter kissing headstones,” Taylor mused as we began to walk back to the car.

I chuckled and wrapped my free arm around Taylor, tightening my grip on Lesia as we walked away from the grave that I made sure to visit at least once a month. The grave that read:

Lesia Amor Matthews

Daughter, sister, loving fiancée

Dream sweet dreams for you

25.07.84 – 05.05.06