Confusion Girl

Wolf-whistles.

That was the reception the three boys greeted me with when I slumped myself down at the kitchen table the following morning. John, Tom and Jo all stopped what they were doing – eating and nursing headaches thanks to their hangovers – to appraise me. I rolled my eyes but couldn’t help but smile. It felt good to know I didn’t look like such a plastic train-wreck any longer.

“Well hello there,” Tom carefully lowered himself into the chair opposite sloshing a bowl of cereal around “but where has blondie gone?”

I shrugged before leaning over and stealing the cereal from right under his dozy nose. It was always fun when the boys had hangovers – I could get away with murder. Their dazed expressions could never turn angry enough and their hands could never most fast enough. “She got boring.”

“I don’t know… she proved quite entertaining at the gig last night with Alec,” John smirked lazily from where he was slumped against a countertop. He was lucky that Jo’s parents were away on a holiday, he would have gotten an earful for putting any of his body anywhere near Aunt Carol’s fancy marble units.

“What are you talking about?” I played dumb and slurped up the cereal.

“When you and Alec were sucking face,” Tom didn’t seem to have noticed I’d stolen his breakfast. Either that or he thought the empty space below his head was tastier as he spooned thin air into his mouth.

“You lot were drunk, God knows what kind of hallucinations you harbored.”

“Nuh-uh,” Tom protested “we saw alright.”

“Alec couldn’t stop talking about it either,” Jo grumbled darkly “I swear if he hadn’t fallen asleep I would have punched his lights out.”

I cocked my head to a side and scrutinized the boys’ faces for anything suspicious but found only half stunned expressions of stupor. “You guys look like hell; maybe you should get some more sleep. If you want I can go make a run for some more Advil?” In all honesty I just wanted to get out of the house before Alec had an opportunity to stumble upon me. I kept telling myself that my rather radical hair change was nothing to do with him but that was failing.

“I swear,” John advanced quickly and engulfed me in a bear hug from where I still sat at the table. “If you weren’t Jo’s cousin and Alec didn’t have dibs on you I would actually kiss you.”

I laughed and patted his arm awkwardly. “Go back to bed tiger.”

In around 5 seconds flat the three boys had all evacuated the kitchens to wherever it was they crashed. That was the fastest I had ever seen them move – hangover or not. I chuckled to myself before grabbing Jo’s car keys from the desktop and heading outside.

It was fresh that morning. Dew sparkled in the newly arisen sun’s light so the lawns twinkled as if some small hyper child had been around the neighborhood wreaking havoc with their glitter pens. I smiled pleasantly into the sunlight and looked down at the ends of my hair. It shone copper red – not exactly the shade predicted on the box but nonetheless dramatic and actually quite pretty.

I got to the car before I saw Alec sitting in his fancy vehicle perched awkwardly on the curb. Instantly, an inner debate sparked as to whether I should ignore him or actually attempt to see whether he was experiencing some kind of mental breakdown. The way he was staring so blankly into space made me almost worry for his psychological health – not that he would lose much anyway.

With a heavy mind, I tapped lightly on his window, carefully positioning myself with Jo’s car behind me so I could still make a speedy getaway if the need arose. You never knew around Alec. I ran the risk of being kissed all over again. Alec slowly tore his eyes away from nothingness so that they fell on me instead. A shocked smile almost instantly aligned his features. The window rolled down easily with the help of expensive mechanics but I didn’t lean in any closer.

“Hi,” I said timidly.

“Your hair,” he stated.

“Well if that wasn’t just the most intelligent and flattering thing you’ve ever said to me…” I snorted.

“You look just like you used to.”

“It’s closer to auburn than blonde I suppose,” I rubbed my arm unsurely. I didn’t like how his eyes assessed me; as if I was the old Lizz who would kiss him back and let him tell me how much he loved me. Like a hair colour would ever make me stupid again.

“I like it,” he beamed “and I like how hot you look in that outfit.” I rolled my eyes, fighting the blush, to steer closer to Jo’s car. I didn’t know whether he was serious or not – I was only wearing an oversized jumper of Jo’s and leggings that were a size too big.

“Sure,” I mumbled “just what are you doing in your car anyway?”

“Thinking.”

“Why?”

“There’s a lot to think about Lizz.”

“In your car?” I could barely suppress my laughter.

He grinned too “the leather helps me think. It’s as if I can feel the cow spirits telling me what to do with my life.” I finally let the laugh break free and roll between us. It had been too long since we’d been like this. Feelings that only hate had been able to contain seeped into my stomach until the laughter died to leave me feeling odd.

“Well I’m going to get the lads some Advil so I’ll see you later.”

“I could always drive you,” he was far too eager. Alarm bells rang.

“Oh no. I really want to drive myself, I’ve been ferried around for far too long – need to feel like a real woman again instead of some pansy damsel.”

“You up for driving this baby?” he smirked.

I bit my lip and glanced guiltily back at Jo’s battered old car. There was really no comparison as to which one I’d rather roll up to Wal-Mart in but the idea of being in an enclosed space again with Alec was too daunting. I couldn’t trust myself let alone him.

“Nah… maybe another day,” I lowered myself into Jo’s ‘beauty’ . The stupid thing stalled and then, when it did splutter to life, made an alarming noise that sounded more animalistic then mechanical. My face burnt with frustration and embarrassment. Alec was smirking even wider from where he now leant against his car. Before I had a chance to really change my mind, the vehicle started properly and had me down the road. I breathed out a long sigh of relief before checking out Alec in my rear-view mirror. Butterflies were still invading my stomach with a force far greater then necessary. I knew I still liked him… stupid things didn’t have to physically remind me of that.