Here Comes Goodbye

Zacky looked up as the door opened and Sam walked in with Lauren beside her, they were both crying, which made Jimmy, Johnny and everyone else start crying again. He didn’t know whether he wanted to see her or not.

Sam went to Roxy and said something, which made Roxy nod her head. He just got up and left the room, he stopped at the door, then knocked. He thought it was the right thing to do. “Come in,” he heard her voice and it made his insides twist.

He walked in and her mouth dropped, his eyes took a while to adjust to the low lighting, but when he did he didn’t smile, or move, he just let the door slide shut behind him. They stared at each other for a moment, green eyes into brown eyes.

“Hi,” she felt just as shy as the first moment she met them, but now it was different she didn’t have the confidence from back then, she wasn’t wearing stilettos, or a mini skirt. She was in a hospital issue gown, with no hair, a bandana, and bruises all over.

“Hi,” Zacky chocked on his words, but one thing he promised himself after watching everyone fall apart, he was going to be there for her, the way she was afraid to ask him to be. He was going to be the strong one.

“How are you?” Jo asked. She really didn’t know what to say, seeing him reminded her how easily she fell in love with him, and how much she still loved him.

“Um....” Zacky scratched his chin.

“No, you don’t have to answer that, I’m sorry, is James here?” Jo had little hope they would of brought him half of her wanted to see him, while the other unselfish half wanted him to be as far away from there as he could humanly be.

“No he’s at home with my mom and dad,” Zacky said. Thinking of all the reasons that Jo didn’t want James with her, he could understand finally, what kind of mother would be able to give up her child. A mother that cares too much for her child.

“That’s good, look....I really...” Jo was about to say, but she needed her oxygen she grabbed the mask and put it on, Zacky was by her side.

“Listen to me, for once, just keep the mask on and don’t talk. I’m sorry, I’m sorry 7 years ago I didn’t tell you how I felt, I’m sorry we slept together....No, that didn’t sound right, I’m sorry about the circumstances, or what happened after, I’m grateful for our son. I’m sorry you didn’t trust me then, to tell me what you were doing, that I wasn’t trustworthy enough for you to not do what you did,” he took a breath.

“I’m sorry that I was a dick when I realized it was you, I’m sorry for not telling you everything, but one thing I’m not sorry for is the fact that I love you,” he said it, at last he said those words to her again and her eyes started to burn. She laughed and moved the mask.

“What did you say?” she wanted to hear him say it, clearer, she shut off the oxygen.

“I love you, I loved you from the moment I got into that crazy car with you, and we drove so fast past them, I loved you when I found out that you could write with such beauty, I loved you when I saw you on that bike, I loved you when you held me in the hospital, I loved you when I met you, I was falling in love all over with this blond chick who had this attitutd about her, but she was hiding something, and I fell in love with you all over again when I saw my son. My beautiful son, that has the same hair as you, and the same nose, the same shape of the eyes, but my eyes. I love you, and I can’t let you go, not this time, you are not dying.”

“Zacky?” Jo’s voice was quivering.

“Yeah?” He looked at her and watched her tears fall down her cheeks, she was still the most beautiful person he knew, because he knew her inside and out.

“I love you too,” she said and he let out a laugh. Of relief, of happiness, this was where he was supposed to be, here taking care of the only person in his life that mattered more then the band and his family. He leaned in and kissed her lips the simple contact made his heart beat faster, it made hers speed up which was showing on the machines.

“I can tell,” he laughed pulling away but holding her hand. “By the way, I forgive you,” he said lying down next to her and running his hand up and down her arm.

“For what?”

“For making my blood boil when you said the world lover,” he said kissing the top of her head. He didn’t care she smelt like a hospital or that she had no hair he loved her and she loved him that was all that mattered.

She remembered a song from a long time before that applied now, she tired the tune on her lips. “What am I supposed to do when the best part of me is always you”

Zacky continued “ What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're ok
I'm falling to pieces
I'm falling to pieces”

“Funny thing for the first time in a long time, I think I have all my pieces together,” Jo said as she let her eyes drift shut, if this had been a dream it was one she didn’t plan on waking up from, if she died and this was heaven it was alright by her, she didn’t care. For the first time she didn’t care for a good reason.