If the slipper fits

Dinner was a sordid affair, with my mother and step father so head over heels in love it was enough to put me off my food and with my figure that was something I really didn’t want. So I forced the tasteless lumps down my throat while holding my gag reflex in check as Tania nudged me and I forced a giggle just for her sake. I knew she worried about me being too sad but when Ella asked for me to pass the soy sauce it was all to easy for me to slip back into my sombre expression. I passed the perfect princess the soy sauce and had to physically stop myself from recoiling as her fingers brushed mine. She looked fantastic, as always, even dressed down in white jeans and a cute little summer top, pink naturally her favourite colour. Her smile was dazzling; two sets of perfectly straight pearly whites framed by full pink lips and it sickened me. I pushed the food around my plate and watched as Tania scoffed her noodles.

I sighed and took a sip only to choke on it and get a worried query from miss perfect. I forced myself to stop coughing and nodded, letting my hair fall over my face to hide the tears that were springing to my eyes as I refused to cough. I took a few more sips of the fizzy drink that felt like poison and dipped a prawn cracker into my sweet and sour sauce, trying not to pull a face as it turned to ash on my tongue.

When dinner was finished Tania left quickly. I didn’t glance at her as Ella sprang up and started to clear away. I wondered if I should help, it wasn’t just her house but she looked so goddamn happy doing it that I had to turn away. Thanking my…parents I stood from the table and walked up to my room.

After I ducked under the stupidly low doorframe I glanced around to see Tania sitting on my bed and could only guess why she was in here. I sat next to her and we shared an almost comfortable silence. I knew she was itching to gossip about Ella, maybe a good bitching session would have helped me. But I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. Yes I hated her but that was just because she was so damn perfect. It was hard to bitch about perfectness. So when Tania said something about borrowing some lotion I relented easily, I felt bad, not being able to give her what she wanted yet at the same time I despaired of her. She always had to find fault in things; she could never just let things lie.

Even before the door opened I knew who had knocked at my door. Such a sweet, polite little knock could only belong to my perfect little step sister. Sure enough she poked her pretty blonde head around the door and entered my room. That I really didn’t like. I hardly liked Tania coming into my room without an invitation, let alone someone who made my blood boil every time I looked at her. Yet again she looked flawless, even the disarray of her hair seemed staged, like on films and television when bed hair is shiny and sleek with a few tiny strands out of place. I shook my head gently as she offered the hot chocolate. I couldn’t eat tea let alone have anything for supper. I sighed as Tania stormed off and Ella looked stunned, she obviously couldn’t understand why Tania was so stroppy. I had an idea but who knew what my twin sister was thinking?

I glanced at Ella who was looking around my room, her face was impassive, and I couldn’t see any expressions in her eyes to tell me what she thought of my room. I wanted to scream when she started to walk around, staring at all my posters. Abstract images expressing hidden emotions that called out to me. My eyes followed her until she came to my desk, the only piece of furniture I had insisted upon during this whole move. I stood quickly, striding over and closing my sketch book as I saw her hand reach for it.

“I’m sorry Tess, I wasn’t trying to pry.” Ella apologised quickly in that sickly sweet voice of hers that implored you to forgive her. But I wasn’t in a mood to forgive. My eyes turned flat and cold as I glared at her.

“No, you probably weren’t. But inevitably you were. This isn’t some perfect little dream world Ella, next time wait until you’re invited into my room alright? I could have been doing anything that I don’t even want Tania seeing, let alone you.” I snarled, I saw her face pale as she heard the venom in my voice but I couldn’t be bothered to try and censor anything, she was just lucky I wasn’t like Tania. Tania would have probably hit her by now; maybe a broken nose would do her good, mess up that angle face of hers. Before I could really contemplate moving my arm Ella turned and fled from my room. I sighed and took my sketch pad to the bed. Pulling out a fine liner I turned to my latest piece and continued to hash out shadows in the background of the grungy alleyway before flicking to a vivid green pen and brutally inking in the word ‘Jealousy’ in a graffiti style. I continued to add to the picture, keeping the rest of the colours dark in the light of the lamp next to my bed until it was light enough for me to turn off the lamp and use the natural light.

I glanced up as I heard people stir and sighed. I would be facing the first day of school without any sleep in twenty four hours. What fun.