The August Project

Anthony dragged me into the house so fast you’d think Delilah’s father was on the warpath or something. But more than likely he was still treading a groove into their living room floor.

“Oh my God, what did you do that for? Now he’ll know where to find us!” I yelled at him.

“Jed, calm down, he’s not coming after us,” he said to me, as I was trying to get my breathing regulated.

“Not yet!” I exclaimed. “Did you see him in there?! If we ever go near his darling little Lila again I think he might actually go all chain-saw-massacre on us!”

“I hate it when you get hysterical. He’s not literally going to kill us! Look at me,” he grasped my shoulders and made me do so. “Stop it.”

“Feel my pulse, am I alright?” I felt really panicky.

“Jed this is silly.” He drew me into a hug and rubbed circles on my back and whispered to me, “You’re being ridiculous. He’s not going to do anything just because we took his daughter shopping. Okay?”

“I’m quite aware of how ridiculous I am,” I told him.

He laughed and squeezed me tighter. “Oh you really are the living end.”

“Keeps you on your toes though,” I smiled up at him.

As if to answer he just kissed me and didn’t say anything. Then I took his hand and led him into my kitchen to see how Delilah was doing.

“Jed-”

“Ah ah, I’ll none of that. This time it really is research. If we’re going to be her fairy godmothers then we need to orchestrate the most efficient way to get Cinderella out of that tall tower she’s been trapped in.”

“Okay, I’ll ignore that blatant mix up of classic fairy tales only because I want to help save her. But we’ve never had to rescue anyone form their own house before,” Boyfriend noted. I honestly hadn’t thought that far ahead. I was more worried of how I’d get him to go along with my plan, whenever I got one that is. “So what’s the plan?” he asked.

Oh great, Jed, time to pull something out of your ass here. “To get her out of her house, become her best friends and give her the best fucking adolescence ever!”

“No Jed, that’s the goal. The plan would be a series of steps that we follow to reach the goal.” Know it all. “Do you even have a plan?”

“Well not in so many words…” I trailed off.

“What?! You mean to tell me that Mr. Torchwood Enthusiast doesn’t have secret plan to solve this mission? I’m shocked!”

“Oh shut up. You just caught Captain Jack on an off day, that’s all.” Boyfriend was enjoying this too much. He always teases me for my obsession with that show.

“Last I checked, you said I was Captain Jack and you were the coffee boy…what’s-his-face.”

“His name is Ianto and despite what you say, he’s cute. But that’s not important! Right now I’m Jed and you’re Anthony and that is Delilah over there thinking that her father has just ruined her only chance at having friends in this town! And we need to help her.”

“Yes, we’ve gotten that far at least. But how do we help her? We’d need to get her a message somehow and find a place to meet where her parents won’t be suspicious of. We’re probably going to have to hide any contact we make from them so they don’t actually come after us.”

“But you said that wouldn’t happen!” I squeaked, my voice cracking.

“Oh love it won’t, don’t worry,” he said, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. “I’ll protect you. And besides, everybody knows that two queens can beat a straight any day,” he finished with a lame pun and kissed the side of my head. In the world of poker he would actually be wrong, but when he says things like that it just makes me love him a little bit more.

“Okay, then. What now?”

“Well actually I’d be quite content to just stay like this for the rest of the day. Your hair smells good,” he said, nuzzling his nose into my brown hair.

“Stop, that tickles,” I giggled. “But seriously, we have to figure out a way of getting a message to Delilah. She doesn’t have a cell phone or a computer and I’m certain her father would hang up on us if we tried to call her house. What does that leave?!”

“It’s starting to seem like we may have to resort to more primitive forms of communication,” Boyfriend said somberly.

“Like what?” I asked. He sounded so Goddamn serious I was almost afraid of his answer.

“Paper airplanes.”

“Oh my Lord, how did I ever get stuck with you?”

“That Valentine in eighth grade, remember?” He had both arms around me now and I was wriggling to get free.

“Yes, I remember. Now let me go, I just had an idea!” As soon as he withdrew his death hold I dashed out into the backyard, leaving him stunned and stupefied in my kitchen. After realizing he hadn’t followed me, I ran back inside, pecked his lips and said, “Come on,” leading him out back by the hand.

“So what was this idea you had?” he asked. Nosy Boyfriend. Couldn’t he wait until I unveiled the genius of my plan on my time?

I sighed. “My plan is,” I said emphatically, grabbing a piece of paper from the notepad my Mum keeps outside. “Give me a pen.” I could tell this was getting to him, but he handed over the mini-pen he always kept clipped to his keys. “My plan is,” I began again as I started writing on the paper.

“What is your plan?!”

“Patience, Boyfriend,” I scolded him. “My plan is to write her a note and then clip it on the line.” The line I referred to was an old clothesline that ran across both our backyards and was fastened by pullies on either side. I noticed, when I had helped my Mum fold sheets the other day, that it was darling little Lila who was doing the laundry for her house. “Then if I pull the line and get the note over to her side, with any luck she’ll find it and that will be the end of that!” I clapped here for emphasis.

“You know,” Anthony looked at me as if he was thinking about what to say. “That’s crazy. So crazy it just might work.”

“Your Mom’s so crazy it just might work,” I mumbled, as I worked on attaching the paper to the clothesline.

“What?”

“Nothing Boyfriend,” I replied, smiling at him sweetly. “Nothing at all.” After getting the note on the line, I pulled it until the note was hanging in Delilah’s yard. It was up to fate now.

“Okay, sure then.” He held a hand out to me and I let him lead us back into my house when I took it. “So what did your note say?”

“I can’t remember exactly,” I told him, scrunching up my face. “But I let her know that her fairy godmothers wouldn’t let her down and that she wouldn’t have to be trapped in that prison for much longer. We’ll go all underground railroad if we have to!”

“Well that’s all well and good,” Anthony said. “But I just hope she can make sense of it.”