40 Ways to Annoy Tom Kaulitz

It’s the last couple of weeks of tour and soon we’ll be going home. I kind of wanted to go home, but then again I didn’t, Touring with the guys was fun. I’d gotten even closer to them, something that I didn’t think was possible, and I didn’t want to end just yet. But, I didn’t really have a choice in the matter.

We were on our way to New York again. Why? I wasn’t really sure, we had already been there. But, apparently there was a different venue that they wanted to play at. I didn’t really understand why it mattered. New York is New York right? They all just looked at me like I was insane when I pointed it out, so I just dropped it. It had to be some kind of band thing that I just wasn’t getting.

At the moment, I was sitting on the couch on the tour bus, watching American T.V. It was some show called Made and so far it was proving to be pretty interesting. It was about a Goth girl wanting to be prom queen, which I laughed at and called impossible. Hey, I had just gotten out of high school and knew that it was impossible. Surprisingly, she ended up getting what she wanted. I just brushed it off as people getting paid off for it. That’s exactly what it was.

I was just getting into a new episode when I heard an angry voice calling my name from the room over.

“Natasha!” The angry growl belonged to the one and only Tom Kaulitz. I rolled my eyes, but in the back of my mind I couldn’t but help thinking about what I had done this time. As far as I knew, nothing. I hadn’t done a single thing.

I stood from my spot on the couch, leaving the half eaten bag of chips behind. I strolled into the next room, trying my hardest to think of what it could possibly be. But, unfortunately, I couldn’t think of anything.

I had to have done something though, because the look Tom was giving me when I arrived in the kitchen was murderous. I almost ran out of the room after stepping foot inside. The curiosity of what I could have done is what kept me in place. “Uh, hey Tom.” I said awkwardly, shifting my weight from one foot to the other. I looked around the kitchen quickly, trying to find something out of place. That’s when I saw it.

Black and grey smoke was billowing from the toaster. The faint smell of nail polish remover hung in the air and there was used fire extinguisher sitting beside it. I face completely fell when I saw it. How could I forget that I had put it in there? Not only that, but why hadn’t it been discovered sooner? And last but not least, how did I miss this? There was bound to be some kind of commotion.

I pulled my eyes away from the toaster and smiled sheepishly at Tom. I caught a look at Georg in the background. He was doubled over in silent laughter, most likely trying to keep Tom from noticing, and looked like he was getting ready to pee on himself.

“What happened?” I asked innocently.

If it was possible, Tom’s glare deepened, and the frown on his face was hard to miss. “Don’t tell me you don’t know anything about this, Natasha.” He scolded harshly.

I shrank back slightly, but I didn’t want him to notice. So, I tried to regain my initial stance but failed miserably.

“No, really. What happened?” I asked.

Tom opened this mouth, most likely to yell, but was cut off by Georg.

He had managed to compose himself greatly in the last 30 seconds and was now only adorning a smile. “Tom decided he wanted some toast and when it was halfway done we noticed a really funny smell in the air. But, it was too late and the toaster burst into flames. We managed to put it out, but found the remains for a nail polish remover bottle. You’re the only one stupid enough to put that in a toaster, so we knew it was you.” He said, shrugging slightly.

I took offense to his stupid comment, but I couldn’t address that as of right now. I was to busy trying to make myself seem innocent when I knew fully well that I wasn’t. It wasn’t an easy task to succeed in with Tom, but I was trying my damnedest.

“I could have been Bill,” I pointed out, referring to his always freshly painted nails. I have to admit that I felt like crap for blaming Bill, but honestly I forgot about the bottle and didn’t want to get bitched out about it right now. I would gladly place the blame on Bill for a while if that meant that I got a few more minutes of watching my newly found favorite show. So, it was worth it.

“You and I both know that Bill wouldn’t dare waste any nail polish remover.” Georg said instantly, shooting my theory done.

Damn. I instantly deflated. There was absolutely no way that I was getting out of this now. Guess it’s time to fess up.

“Okay fine,” I groaned throwing my head back. Tom looked pleased, yet just as pissed as he did before. “I put it in there that one time I painted Tom’s nails and forgot about it. I’m sorry, I really didn’t mean to okay?” I spat our quickly. I wanted it out before Tom had a chance to yell at me and hopefully I would calm down a bit.

To my surprise, Tom’s anger vanished. I raised an eyebrow and looked to Georg for an explanation. He looked almost as shocked as I did and shot me a looking telling me that he didn’t know either.

“By the way, Tom. You look like Medusa when you’re angry, except with more snakes out your head.” I blurted out my random thought before I could even think about stopping myself. Damn word vomit, it always like to act up when things started to calm down. I guess my body just didn’t like calm.

I glared, but wrapped his arms around me anyways and carried me towards the bunks. I knew that I was slowly on my way to my doom. I looked over Tom’s shoulder to Georg, pleading him for help with my eyes.

He just raised his hands defensively as if saying I was on my own and walked in the opposite direction to the T.V. room. I knew that by the time I was being tortured in the bunks that he would be finishing off my chips and watching the last bit of Made. The thought alone made me struggle against Tom. Of course, I had no idea what I was thinking because there is no way I would win.

Fortunately, the punishment I received wasn’t that bad. Actually, it was somewhat what you would call pleasurable. If you get my drift.

I should make comments like that more often.