Fate Is Insanity.
I Don't Believe In Fate.
She walked alone.
The single car’s headlights cut her in half, sending her shadow running, long and narrow in front of her. Her fingers, how numb they must be, grappled with the edges of her worn coat and I watched as she pulled it closer around her. The car slowed as it came up to her, and then swerved slightly to avoid hitting her. She didn’t look up as it passed her; instead she turned her face to the shadows, her hair dropping like a shield in front of the pale moon of her face. The car sped up as it left her, sending the newly fallen snow flying in her face. She walked quickly, head down.
I watched her from the steps of my porch, the embers of my cigarette burning alongside me, forgotten. I watched her, and I vaguely considered asking her if she needed a phone. I mean, it was after all, after eleven at night and it was fucking snowing. She drew level with the edge of my driveway and then suddenly, stopped.
Startled, I shoved my cigarette into the snow, and waited uncertainly.
She was standing still, as if she had heard her name, and was looking over her shoulder at the road behind her. Suddenly she coughed, the sound echoing off the trees, her thin shoulders shaking as she bent over with the force of the cough. Her hands twined in her hair, pulling it into a messy ponytail, and she looked around once more.
I drew back into the shadows, not wanting to be seen by this girl. It’s not like I was afraid of her, I just didn’t want to be caught watching her. She sighed, the sound reaching me like a whisper and I felt suddenly guilty. Like I had been watching something too personal. I stepped farther back into the shadows, and like an idiot, hit some decorative iron angel thing my mom insisted was gorgeous. The angel fell over, smacking into the wall, and then the wooden porch, breaking the silence and sending my heart racing. I stumbled away from the noise, tripping over the angel and my own feet, finally banging into the screen door.
So much for fading away into the shadows.
“Hello?” I heard her call. “Is someone there?”
I froze, and stayed silent. I didn’t want her to know that I had seen her. She had looked so weak, so alone.
It was a private moment meant for God’s eyes only.
“Hello?” she called again. I heard footsteps, a crunching in the snow.
Oh fuck. I took a breath and turned to look at the girl.
The girl must be equipped with night vision because she was now standing in the yard, looking right at me.
“I said hello.” She accused.
“Hello…” I said in my best ashamed voice.
She smiled, her face cracking into a beautiful mask. No, not a mask. The worry, the fear, the cold that I had seen was the mask.
I was looking at the girl.
And I think I fell into something like love.
**********
Should I continue?
The single car’s headlights cut her in half, sending her shadow running, long and narrow in front of her. Her fingers, how numb they must be, grappled with the edges of her worn coat and I watched as she pulled it closer around her. The car slowed as it came up to her, and then swerved slightly to avoid hitting her. She didn’t look up as it passed her; instead she turned her face to the shadows, her hair dropping like a shield in front of the pale moon of her face. The car sped up as it left her, sending the newly fallen snow flying in her face. She walked quickly, head down.
I watched her from the steps of my porch, the embers of my cigarette burning alongside me, forgotten. I watched her, and I vaguely considered asking her if she needed a phone. I mean, it was after all, after eleven at night and it was fucking snowing. She drew level with the edge of my driveway and then suddenly, stopped.
Startled, I shoved my cigarette into the snow, and waited uncertainly.
She was standing still, as if she had heard her name, and was looking over her shoulder at the road behind her. Suddenly she coughed, the sound echoing off the trees, her thin shoulders shaking as she bent over with the force of the cough. Her hands twined in her hair, pulling it into a messy ponytail, and she looked around once more.
I drew back into the shadows, not wanting to be seen by this girl. It’s not like I was afraid of her, I just didn’t want to be caught watching her. She sighed, the sound reaching me like a whisper and I felt suddenly guilty. Like I had been watching something too personal. I stepped farther back into the shadows, and like an idiot, hit some decorative iron angel thing my mom insisted was gorgeous. The angel fell over, smacking into the wall, and then the wooden porch, breaking the silence and sending my heart racing. I stumbled away from the noise, tripping over the angel and my own feet, finally banging into the screen door.
So much for fading away into the shadows.
“Hello?” I heard her call. “Is someone there?”
I froze, and stayed silent. I didn’t want her to know that I had seen her. She had looked so weak, so alone.
It was a private moment meant for God’s eyes only.
“Hello?” she called again. I heard footsteps, a crunching in the snow.
Oh fuck. I took a breath and turned to look at the girl.
The girl must be equipped with night vision because she was now standing in the yard, looking right at me.
“I said hello.” She accused.
“Hello…” I said in my best ashamed voice.
She smiled, her face cracking into a beautiful mask. No, not a mask. The worry, the fear, the cold that I had seen was the mask.
I was looking at the girl.
And I think I fell into something like love.
**********
Should I continue?