Stupid Girl
Stupid Girl
She sat stirring her iced coffee, eyes hidden behind designer sunglasses, a ring sparkling on her third finger, long brown hair pulled back into a high pony tail. Gena Valentique looks like a modern, everyday woman, if one chooses to exclude the lines of ink tracing up her arms and across her neck. She smiles brilliantly and takes a sip from her drink.
"So, shall we get down to business?"
I nod and put a tape recorder on the center of the table, asking my first question.
"Do you think people underestimate you?" She nods, laughing.
"Consider this: I'm a pretty bartender who never went to college. Of course everyone does."
I met Avenged Sevenfold by chance, walking off to a bar after seeing them play their live show, which was okay. I don't really like rock music. There were a group of people walking out of a side door, directly in front of me.
"Excuse me-" In front of me, I'm pretty sure this had been that lead singer guy who screamed himself hoarse tonight. "M. Shadows?" The tall, muscular man nodded. I smiled and introduced myself, shaking his hand and getting introduced to the rest of the throng. One bimbo to every rocker, save for one, who tried to hypnotize me with his green-blue eyes. Pretty, but not that pretty as to make up for his odd nose or that chub showing through his shirt.
"Hey," Green Eyes started, "Would you happen to know of any decent bars around here? We're lookin' to party." Eugh. Rock stars. Have they no motive in life but to get drunk? There was, in fact, a bar very close to here.
"Yeah, I'm actually on my way to working at one right now." And so it began that I got a group of kind of-not really-sorta-famous people to follow me to 6's and 7's. I ran in ahead of them after showing the bouncer my tits (it has to be done of you're going to get anywhere) and watched a bleach blonde walk out from the bar to a side door. I followed through the thick crowd of drunk bodies and got to the door before it shut.
"Hey, you!" I called to Bimbo.
"The hell do you want? I'm on my break and not making you a special order anything, so piss off."
"First off, I came out here to tell you that you can take a long break. Ya see, I'm a trained bartender, and my friends don't believe me.." I babbled on and on about how I was credible and my friends were being stupid, and blahblahblah until she was nodding along with my words. I honestly hoped she was as dumb as she looked.
"I'm Marley." She held out a hand with inch-long yellow acrylic nails. I shook it hesitantly, hoping her claws wouldn't draw blood.
"I'm ah, Gena." Fuck, I'd almost forgotten my name. It happens, but Bimbo -I mean Marley- didn't catch the slip. She was giving me a very weird look.
"Okay, lemme get this straight.. You want me to leave my job for an hour so you can, with no pay, be a bartender to some of your new friends?"
I nodded vigorously. "I went to bartending school, so it's alright." I hadn't gone to bartending school, just a lot of parties out of high school. What's another lie? Marley shrugged.
"You absolutely sure? There's a lot of idiots in here tonight." She flipped her wispy blonde bangs out of her mud-coloured eyes and shrugged. I nodded again, slow enough that this idiot would understand. "If you're absolutely sure..."
I smiled. "Yeah, I am."
***
The band and all girlfriends sat at the bar I'd never worked at in my life, drinking shot after free shot. It was only twenty minutes or so before they all started to get rowdy and say stupid shit. My eyes roamed to Zacky (AKA Green Eyes). He looked up at me and smiled, waving me over.
"Another Jack and Coke, Gee?"
I froze halfway to a glass, looking up.
"How'd you know my nickname?" It always helps to act believable. Or, in my case, dumb.
He shrugged, blue-green eyes twinkling in the dim light. "I guessed. My ex always liked being called that." Ah. Now that he was drunk, he'd start babbling about his ex, whom he'd loved and missed and blah, blah, blah he'd wanted to have babies with her, marry her, blah. Not to be overly callous, but by being a fake bartender, I fake hear this fake shit every fake night. It gets fake tiring.
"Oh. Good guess." I smiled a little at him before turning around to get the whiskey before he did, in fact, begin babbling. I bent down to retrieve the bottle and heard a "Damn," from behind me.
"What?" I asked. He likes my ass, right?
"I said, damn. You have a nice ass."
I rolled my eyes. Bingo. Getting hit on is a give-in when you're in a room full of assholes.
"Thanks." I responded quickly, adding a little coke to the glass before handing it off to him. His fingers wrapped gently around mine as I placed the drink on the bar, eyes locked on mine.
"You know, I'd really love to see that sweet ass again."
"Zacky.." I chided, momentarily pretending he was a senile man who had told me to stick a log up my pussy. That was the reason I didn't like nursing homes. "don't you have to be in Albany tomorrow?"
He smiled mischievously and let go of my hand. "Yeah, but tomorrow has nothing to do with tonight."
We left the bar half an hour later, just as Marley walked back in. She winked at me in reference to Zacky, who was stumbling behind me as I led him to a motel room close by.
<insert badly written sex scene here>
~*~
Whenever he's close, we'd get together and hump for a day, minus a show or whatever signing they had going on. It was interesting being close to a rock star, getting to know everyone so well. Of course, they knew nothing about me. This was just an entertaining game. At one point, almost ten months later, Zacky had invited me down to Huntington. And really, how can anyone say no to a week of beachgoing and sex?
I got to California when I'd said I would, taking a taxi down to an address I'd thought was Zacky's house. But, to my surprise, Brian opened the door.
"Oh, hey Gena!" I hugged him quickly and asked about Zacky. He hesitated, as though I'd found out his big, bad plan. "He's in LA until later tonight."
"Really? Shit..." Oh. So that means I'm having sex with you then. I tried to keep a little devious smile off my face, paying more attention to not reacting than said hot sexy man in front of me. I asked him to repeat himself.
"I said you can just stay here until he comes back, it's a boring and kinda pathetic to drink alone." I smiled at Brian as he moved to let me pass.
*have good drunk sex and Gena realizes Brian's better hung, not to mention a better fuck*
Right before I left, I walked up to get my bra out of the bathroom (round 2 had been in the very nice shower) and noticed something twinkling by the sink. A closer look revealed it was a Tiffany & Co platinum chain, studded with diamonds every few loops. I heard Brian walking up the stairs and quickly stuffed it in my purse. A nice souvenir to remember the great afternoon by.
I hopped back on a plane that night after Brian had dropped me off, giving me a rather distracting french kiss before I got into the plane. Zacky called me the next morning to ask where I'd been, why I hadn't shown up in California. I told him my new serious boyfriend wouldn't appreciate it. That excuse always works. And come on, like I wouldn't have a boyfriend? He's the clueless type.
From then on Zacky never called me again, though next time the band was in town, Brian did sneak off with me for a few hours in a hotel.
Brian called out of the blue a few weeks later to ask If I'd seen his favourite chain. Michelle had gotten it for him as a Christmas present and hadn't seen it in a while. I shrugged over the phone, clasping my prize around my neck. My reflection smiled evilly, the stones glittered beautifically.
"Nah, sorry." I answered, then hung up on him.
Whenever they tour and come anywhere between Pennsylvania and Rhode Island, I follow the band for a bit, Brian and I have a great time. Whenever the band is off tour, he'll pay for me to come down to Huntington and we'll fuck on and off for a week or two. It's fun.
What's even nicer is that I actually work for an acting company and like to use my skills to my benefit. My name is not Gena Valentique. It's Rachel Gadreau. Hi, I'm a part-time con artist. Of course, I don't tell the interviewer, a star-struck college girl, any of this story. Instead, she gets to know that I met the band at a backstage meet-and-greet or whatever and we all became really, really good friends. She smiles nervously and giggles before asking her next mumbled question.
"And.. what happened from there?"
Gena shrugs, another small, secretive grin implanted on her face.
"I got the hell out of there. Brian and I still talk from time to time. We've.. met up eight times in the year and a half since, but no one knows but him and I. Even Michelle has no idea."
"What did you tell Zacky when you left?"
"That I'd canceled the flight because I thought we shouldn't see each other anymore. The band's currently in Tokyo and I've heard nothing in a few weeks from any of them. It'll probably be awkward when they get back into town, but I've got a plan." She leaned across the table as though telling a secret. "As I said before, I'm just a pretty bartender who never went to college." Gena finally removes her dark glasses, showing dazzling green eyes.
"But, I never said I was stupid, did I?" She gets up from the table with a laugh and swoops away on six-inch heels. I watch her leave before turning to gather my things.
Odd... I could've sworn the tape recorder was right here...
"So, shall we get down to business?"
I nod and put a tape recorder on the center of the table, asking my first question.
"Do you think people underestimate you?" She nods, laughing.
"Consider this: I'm a pretty bartender who never went to college. Of course everyone does."
I met Avenged Sevenfold by chance, walking off to a bar after seeing them play their live show, which was okay. I don't really like rock music. There were a group of people walking out of a side door, directly in front of me.
"Excuse me-" In front of me, I'm pretty sure this had been that lead singer guy who screamed himself hoarse tonight. "M. Shadows?" The tall, muscular man nodded. I smiled and introduced myself, shaking his hand and getting introduced to the rest of the throng. One bimbo to every rocker, save for one, who tried to hypnotize me with his green-blue eyes. Pretty, but not that pretty as to make up for his odd nose or that chub showing through his shirt.
"Hey," Green Eyes started, "Would you happen to know of any decent bars around here? We're lookin' to party." Eugh. Rock stars. Have they no motive in life but to get drunk? There was, in fact, a bar very close to here.
"Yeah, I'm actually on my way to working at one right now." And so it began that I got a group of kind of-not really-sorta-famous people to follow me to 6's and 7's. I ran in ahead of them after showing the bouncer my tits (it has to be done of you're going to get anywhere) and watched a bleach blonde walk out from the bar to a side door. I followed through the thick crowd of drunk bodies and got to the door before it shut.
"Hey, you!" I called to Bimbo.
"The hell do you want? I'm on my break and not making you a special order anything, so piss off."
"First off, I came out here to tell you that you can take a long break. Ya see, I'm a trained bartender, and my friends don't believe me.." I babbled on and on about how I was credible and my friends were being stupid, and blahblahblah until she was nodding along with my words. I honestly hoped she was as dumb as she looked.
"I'm Marley." She held out a hand with inch-long yellow acrylic nails. I shook it hesitantly, hoping her claws wouldn't draw blood.
"I'm ah, Gena." Fuck, I'd almost forgotten my name. It happens, but Bimbo -I mean Marley- didn't catch the slip. She was giving me a very weird look.
"Okay, lemme get this straight.. You want me to leave my job for an hour so you can, with no pay, be a bartender to some of your new friends?"
I nodded vigorously. "I went to bartending school, so it's alright." I hadn't gone to bartending school, just a lot of parties out of high school. What's another lie? Marley shrugged.
"You absolutely sure? There's a lot of idiots in here tonight." She flipped her wispy blonde bangs out of her mud-coloured eyes and shrugged. I nodded again, slow enough that this idiot would understand. "If you're absolutely sure..."
I smiled. "Yeah, I am."
***
The band and all girlfriends sat at the bar I'd never worked at in my life, drinking shot after free shot. It was only twenty minutes or so before they all started to get rowdy and say stupid shit. My eyes roamed to Zacky (AKA Green Eyes). He looked up at me and smiled, waving me over.
"Another Jack and Coke, Gee?"
I froze halfway to a glass, looking up.
"How'd you know my nickname?" It always helps to act believable. Or, in my case, dumb.
He shrugged, blue-green eyes twinkling in the dim light. "I guessed. My ex always liked being called that." Ah. Now that he was drunk, he'd start babbling about his ex, whom he'd loved and missed and blah, blah, blah he'd wanted to have babies with her, marry her, blah. Not to be overly callous, but by being a fake bartender, I fake hear this fake shit every fake night. It gets fake tiring.
"Oh. Good guess." I smiled a little at him before turning around to get the whiskey before he did, in fact, begin babbling. I bent down to retrieve the bottle and heard a "Damn," from behind me.
"What?" I asked. He likes my ass, right?
"I said, damn. You have a nice ass."
I rolled my eyes. Bingo. Getting hit on is a give-in when you're in a room full of assholes.
"Thanks." I responded quickly, adding a little coke to the glass before handing it off to him. His fingers wrapped gently around mine as I placed the drink on the bar, eyes locked on mine.
"You know, I'd really love to see that sweet ass again."
"Zacky.." I chided, momentarily pretending he was a senile man who had told me to stick a log up my pussy. That was the reason I didn't like nursing homes. "don't you have to be in Albany tomorrow?"
He smiled mischievously and let go of my hand. "Yeah, but tomorrow has nothing to do with tonight."
We left the bar half an hour later, just as Marley walked back in. She winked at me in reference to Zacky, who was stumbling behind me as I led him to a motel room close by.
<insert badly written sex scene here>
~*~
Whenever he's close, we'd get together and hump for a day, minus a show or whatever signing they had going on. It was interesting being close to a rock star, getting to know everyone so well. Of course, they knew nothing about me. This was just an entertaining game. At one point, almost ten months later, Zacky had invited me down to Huntington. And really, how can anyone say no to a week of beachgoing and sex?
I got to California when I'd said I would, taking a taxi down to an address I'd thought was Zacky's house. But, to my surprise, Brian opened the door.
"Oh, hey Gena!" I hugged him quickly and asked about Zacky. He hesitated, as though I'd found out his big, bad plan. "He's in LA until later tonight."
"Really? Shit..." Oh. So that means I'm having sex with you then. I tried to keep a little devious smile off my face, paying more attention to not reacting than said hot sexy man in front of me. I asked him to repeat himself.
"I said you can just stay here until he comes back, it's a boring and kinda pathetic to drink alone." I smiled at Brian as he moved to let me pass.
*have good drunk sex and Gena realizes Brian's better hung, not to mention a better fuck*
Right before I left, I walked up to get my bra out of the bathroom (round 2 had been in the very nice shower) and noticed something twinkling by the sink. A closer look revealed it was a Tiffany & Co platinum chain, studded with diamonds every few loops. I heard Brian walking up the stairs and quickly stuffed it in my purse. A nice souvenir to remember the great afternoon by.
I hopped back on a plane that night after Brian had dropped me off, giving me a rather distracting french kiss before I got into the plane. Zacky called me the next morning to ask where I'd been, why I hadn't shown up in California. I told him my new serious boyfriend wouldn't appreciate it. That excuse always works. And come on, like I wouldn't have a boyfriend? He's the clueless type.
From then on Zacky never called me again, though next time the band was in town, Brian did sneak off with me for a few hours in a hotel.
Brian called out of the blue a few weeks later to ask If I'd seen his favourite chain. Michelle had gotten it for him as a Christmas present and hadn't seen it in a while. I shrugged over the phone, clasping my prize around my neck. My reflection smiled evilly, the stones glittered beautifically.
"Nah, sorry." I answered, then hung up on him.
Whenever they tour and come anywhere between Pennsylvania and Rhode Island, I follow the band for a bit, Brian and I have a great time. Whenever the band is off tour, he'll pay for me to come down to Huntington and we'll fuck on and off for a week or two. It's fun.
What's even nicer is that I actually work for an acting company and like to use my skills to my benefit. My name is not Gena Valentique. It's Rachel Gadreau. Hi, I'm a part-time con artist. Of course, I don't tell the interviewer, a star-struck college girl, any of this story. Instead, she gets to know that I met the band at a backstage meet-and-greet or whatever and we all became really, really good friends. She smiles nervously and giggles before asking her next mumbled question.
"And.. what happened from there?"
Gena shrugs, another small, secretive grin implanted on her face.
"I got the hell out of there. Brian and I still talk from time to time. We've.. met up eight times in the year and a half since, but no one knows but him and I. Even Michelle has no idea."
"What did you tell Zacky when you left?"
"That I'd canceled the flight because I thought we shouldn't see each other anymore. The band's currently in Tokyo and I've heard nothing in a few weeks from any of them. It'll probably be awkward when they get back into town, but I've got a plan." She leaned across the table as though telling a secret. "As I said before, I'm just a pretty bartender who never went to college." Gena finally removes her dark glasses, showing dazzling green eyes.
"But, I never said I was stupid, did I?" She gets up from the table with a laugh and swoops away on six-inch heels. I watch her leave before turning to gather my things.
Odd... I could've sworn the tape recorder was right here...