With Every Strike Of Lightning.

“Jordan, I… uhm, im pregnant.” I whispered.

“What?” Jordan asked having not heard my nervous stutters.

“Jordan, im having a baby.” I said a little louder.

Her face dropped, her mouth hanging open a little bit.

“Why didn’t you tell us?” Was her instant reaction.

“Because of the way Alex took it.” I said, tearing up slightly.

“How did he take it?”

“He shouted at me. Told me we’re too young and that our careers come first. He means his career though.” I sniffed.

“Oh Lauren.” Jordan said, pulling me into a hug.

“Im sorry I didn’t tell you and Claire. I just don’t want you too leave me too.”

“It’s ok. Come on; let’s go back to the bus so you and Claire can talk.” Jordan said, pulling me out of the venue after making me slip on a pair of sunglasses.

We walked out of the venue, I looked anywhere but where I knew Kevin was stood. Once on the bus, I sniffed and walked straight to the bunks. Climbing into mine, I slid off the sunglasses and kicked off my shoes before curling into a ball, my hand instantly going to my stomach.

“Lauren. Claire’s in the living area. I think you two need to talk.” Jordan said softly, opening the curtain.

“I know. I can’t face her though. She’s so mad.” I sighed, turning to face Jordan.

“She needs to know why though.” Jordan said, pulling me out of the bunk and dragging me into the living area before leaving again.

Claire sat on the sofa, aimlessly flicking through the channels, her eyes not leaving the TV screen as it flashed.

“Claire, im sorry.” I said, sitting on the floor.

She didn’t respond so I carried on.

“Kevin guessed it was me. Well kind of. He said he couldn’t ask you and obviously he knows me too well to know when im lying. He saw right through the act I put up. He was the only one to tell because ive already lost him. I don’t want to loose you and Jordan as well. BFF’s forever remember?”

“I just don’t understand Lauren.” Claire sighed, turning the TV off and facing me.

“Im sorry Claire. I couldn’t tell you though. If I lost you and Jordan as well id be nothing. You two are actually like, my rocks.”

“I know Lauren. Im sorry for going off like that. It’s just when I heard you telling Kevin I felt hurt. Alex didn’t take it well I guess?”

“No. He yelled at me. Told me we’re too young and that our careers go first. By that he means his career will always come first.” I sighed, sitting next to Claire.

“Sorry.” Claire sighed as well.

“I don’t know what to do Claire.”

“You’re going to keep the baby and then I will be there for you. After all, im your best friend.” Claire smiled.

I smiled back before hugging her. I hated it when we were arguing so now that things were back to normal, I was the happiest I could be at the point in my life I was at.

After a few minutes, Jordan came from the bunk area and sat down next to me. I side hugged her before falling back onto the sofa and resting my hand on my stomach.

“I can’t believe your having a baby.” Jordan suddenly yelled making me laugh.

“I can’t believe im having a baby.” I sighed, closing my eyes.

“Are you ready for this?” Claire asked.

“Not at all. But do you know what, because of the sprog growing inside of me, ive realised that men are something I could do without in my life. Well apart from Kieran, dad, granddad, Frankie and Nick.” I laughed.

“I like how Nick and Frankie are involved.” Claire laughed.

“I know.” I smiled.

“What about me?” An all too familiar voice asked.

“Not at all.” I sighed.

“Why? I kept your secret.”

“Because you’re a pig. You can go home to Danielle now.” I said, getting up and barging passed Kevin, going straight to my bunk.

After changing into my pyjamas, I curled up in my bunk and fell to sleep almost instantly. During the night, I dreamt strange, confusing dreams. One was of me giving birth but it only taking moments; another was me falling off of a cliff and the final one I couldn’t remember. All I knew was it had woken me in tears.

Instead of going back to sleep so I could wake up in a few hours time again, I climbed out of my bunk and went into the kitchen to grab a bottle of water before setting up my laptop at the dinning table and signing onto my personal twitter.

After putting on there that I was awake and about to sort out my MySpace, I signed off and logged onto my own MySpace account. As I changed things around and updated everything, I heard movement from the sofa. Standing up, I looked around the small wall hiding the sofa from my view. To my surprise, Kevin was asleep on the sofa.

Instead of staying where I was so that I could wake Kevin up and then have to talk to him, I stood up, unplugged my laptop wire and started moving things into my bunk. Just as I went back out to grab my laptop, Kevin woke up. He looked around the wall just as I picked my laptop up and was about to go to my bunk.

“Lauren wait.” Kevin said, grabbing hold of my arm.

“Could you not touch me please? Your girlfriend might get jealous.” I said, pulling my arm away from him.

“Lauren, just wait ok. I hate arguing all of the time. If you trusted me enough to tell me your pregnant surely you can trust me enough to talk to me for two seconds. Please?”

“Quickly.” I sighed, not letting go of my laptop.

“Can we be friends?”

“You think you’ve got the right to ask me if we can be friends?” I asked, keeping my voice quite even though the anger could be heard.

“Yes.”

“Well you don’t. Not really. You broke me Kevin. It hurt so much when you broke up with me. Don’t you realise that? Just because I told you im pregnant doesn’t mean jack. Ok? I thought well ive already lost you so I might as well tell you so it’s not like im going to loose you again.” I said, turning around.

“I know I hurt you. I want you to be my friend though. At least if we’re friends we can slowly build up the trust we had.”

“I guess.” I sighed, giving up with arguing. Yes, im mad with Kevin, but I would rather have him as my friend and be able to tell him things again, just like when Claire and Joe got together, than not in my life at all.

“What do you say? Friends?” Kevin asked, spinning me around and extending his hand for me to shake.

“Friends.” I smiled, shaking his hand before going back to the bunks.

“Wait, where are you going?”

“To bed. See you tomorrow.” I smiled.

I sat on my bunk, legs swinging in front of me over the edge, just thinking, when Mel’s head popped out of her bunk and she climbed out.

“Where are you off to?” I asked her, making her jump.

“Oh my god Lauren, you made me jump.” Mel said in hushed tones.

“Sorry. But like I said where are you off to?”

“Im going to grab a bottle of water. Coming?”

“Ok, sure. I need to talk to you anyway.” I sighed, realising Mel still didn’t know about my new circumstances.

I turned off my laptop quickly before hopping out of my bunk and following Mel into the kitchen. Kevin had gone back to the living area. She grabbed a bottle of water before we went into the practice room. I sat on a stool and picked up my guitar before starting to strum a few cords.

“So, what do you need to talk to me about?” Mel asked, sitting down on the floor.

“Well, it’s kind of important you don’t tell anyone. I mean, Claire and Jordan know but no one else needs to know.” I said sternly.

“Ok, I promise not to tell anyone.”

“Thanks.” I sighed, still strumming my guitar.

“Go ahead. Im listening.”

“Well… like I said, it’s important no ones told. Because well… this is kind of hard to say really, well, im kind of… pregnant.” I stuttered.

“What?” Mel asked, spitting water across the room.

“Im having a baby. But please don’t tell anyone. This is something I don’t want people to know for a while yet. Like maybe for 9 months.” I sighed.

“I promise to keep it quite Lauren. Promise.”

“Thank you Mel.” I smiled.

“That’s ok. What are friend for?”

I laughed before putting guitar back down on the stand and standing up.

“Come on, I need some sleep.” I said, before leaving the practice room. Mel following me out again.

After climbing back into my bunk, I closed the curtains and put my laptop at the end of the bunk. Climbing under the covers, I hugged the pillow I had brought from home into my chest, the familiar smell comforting. I fell asleep around half an hour after climbing into my bunk again.