Help I'm Alive

“I have something to tell you,” Kate whispered, her lips close to my cheek.

My hand fiddled around in my pocket, feeling the little velvet box. I smiled inwardly. “What is it honey?”

“I don’t know how to tell you...” she couldn’t look at me.

I wasn’t worried at all as to what she had to say. I was too busy playing out the next few moments in my head. I was afraid I’d goof up and look like an idiot. I was proposing to her after all.

“Just tell me,” I said impatiently.

She looked at me. “I don’t love you anymore, Mike.”

My stomach knotted up. “W-What?”

“I don’t love you like I did years ago when we were first going out. I don’t know... that fire, it’s just... dead.”

“What did I do?!” I was panicking inside my mind.

“Oh it wasn’t you, you didn’t do anything. It’s me.”

It’s not you, it’s me. How cliché.

“Think about it. We’ve been together for two years. Eventually we’d need to break up, right? This wasn’t going anywhere,” she explained and put down her napkin on the table. She hadn’t eaten any of her dinner. She didn’t like my cooking.

My throat closed up. If this wasn’t going anywhere then why was there a ring in my pocket?

“Get out of here,” I said, the words nearly inaudible.

“Mike, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have dragged it out for so long...”

“Get out of my apartment,” I said angrily. “Please.”

She let out a whimper and got up. I didn’t watch her as she got her coat, put her shoes on, and left.

My head was on the table. That was the only time I cried in my entire life.

I took out the little box and threw it across the room.

I got up angrily, knocking over two wine glasses. I didn’t care if the wine stained my floor. I didn’t care if the glass cut me open, made me bleed.

I changed out of my nice clothes, which were just for that special occasion, and put on just a pair of sweatpants. Tears still stained my face as I walked into the living room.

The little velvet box was right in front of the couch. I picked it up and stared at the beautiful ring. It had cost me a fortune, but price didn’t matter as long as it was for Kate. I would have given her everything.

I threw the box against the wall as hard as I could and crumpled up on the couch, crying until I fell asleep.