I Will Breathe Fire

Shot Through the Heart and Your to Blame

I groan throatily bringing my palms tight to my temples. My head felt like it was going to whirl off if I didn’t hold on to it. I rubbed my eyes thoroughly and rolled over to my side resting my head on my forearm. Even though my eyes where closed, the bright lights that hung from the stadium ceiling, seemed to penetrate through the thin skin covering them.

I groan again, my head wouldn’t stop pulsing. Argh this sucks. I brought my knees up to my chest and sat on them. If my head wasn’t so sore I would be able to see but I was too much of a pussy to get up. But I knew I had to. I half sat, half lied in that position for a while, just long enough for my legs to go to sleep.

“My head,” I moaned before throwing myself on a plastic chair, “oh this sucks so much.”
I slowly opened my eyes shielding my sensitive pupils with my hand. I was in what looked like the commentators room, why was I in the commentators room, on the floor?
“Gerard… Frank… Mikey?” I whined staggering to the door, “where are you?”

I came to the opened door and peered down corridor. Empty. ‘Just great’, I mumbled to myself, ‘aw, where are they’. I stopped at a row of lockers and slumped down to the floor on my back in defeat. My legs fell to the side of my body and my head hung in the opposite direction. I left my hands fall loosely in my lap and trying to focus on soothing my throbbing temples.

“AIDEN?” I hear someone call cautiously. My eyes opened lazily to be greeted by Mikey.
“Yeah, just leave me sprawled out on the floor in the commentary box why don’t you, it’s not like I’d think you guys just left me there to die or anything.” I replied sarcastically. He took my left arm and strapped it around his shoulder before lifting me to a stand.

“Sorry bout that.”

“Why was I in there Michael?”

“Geepers what’s with the Michael?” he giggled. “After you hit the wall pretty hard you kind blacked out so we took you, well Frank carried you to commentary box ‘cause it was the only room with a working heater remember?.”

I gave Mikey a confused look. "What?"

"Don't you remember?"

I don't remember anything. I don't remember hit a wall, I don't remember being carried up by Frank (I want to beat myself up for that). Instead of agruing I sighed and carried on with getting myself down stairs.

“Ooh, ooh, be careful, my head” I cooed as he lifted me more. Mikey giggled before he stopped to study my face, staring into my eyes.

“Ah? Why are you looking at me like that?” I asked questionably.

He slowly brought his fingers to my face and brushed my fringe out of my eyes. “Oh, was I staring?” He smiled “sorry…” He was really creeping me out with the looks he was giving me. Do I have some disgusting shit on my face or something, because I’m sure Mikey’s having a good check of it.

“O-kaaay,” I said rolling my eyes, “well where are the rest of the gang?”

“They’ve gone…”

“What!? Where?” I asked cutting him off.

“Gees can I finish? haha, they’re outside.”

“Ooh.”

“Haha, ooh...” he repeated cheekily.

“Whatever, just take me home… My head hurts.” I laughed.

Time Elapsed

“Guess who I found crawling out of her own shit hole?” Mikey calls out to a group of boys as we walk out to the parking lot to Gerard’s car. I give him a good punch to the arm, “Ow, gees I was just joking, gosh!” Mikey giggled holding me tighter into him.
When I looked up, I saw Gerard leaning on the car dangling a cigarette between his lips, wide-eyed and wicked smile. He grabbed me pulling me from Mikey in a tight embrace.

“What’s with all the lovey dovey thingy happening here? Moreover, what are Bob and them doing here? Wasn’t it just us?” I asked confused looking at the crowd standing around in the parking lot.

“Aw, I’m so proud of you…” Gerard replied totally ignoring my questions.

“Haha, me too, now what the fuck are you talking about? And what’s happening?” I asked again more confused than ever.

“What? You don’t remember?”

“Remember what!? I’ll I remember was waking up on the floor.” I returned still squashed into Gerard’s chest by his masculine arms. The sweet smell of Gerard’s colon filled my nostrils and clouded my thoughts. For a friend Gerard has been there since day one when life began to suck for me. Just because he’s my best friend doesn’t mean I can’t have thoughts for him too. Yes, I’m selfish, I can’t just stick to thoughts for one man.

“So you don’t remember confessing?”

“Confessing what?” I choke pushing Gerard away feeling my head throb even more. I turned to the sudden eruption of laughter from the other group and saw Mikey talking to Frank who just stared at me expressionlessly. I quickly broke the eye contact and focused on the conversation Gerard and I were having.

“Oh no…” Gerard sighed. My heart pounded wilding sending my migraine into over drive. Talk about stress.

“Fuck Gerard, don’t tell me I…”

“You told him you loved him.”

“What!? Are you Fucking Serious?” I screamed getting everyone’s attention. I knew who he was talking about.

“Fucking tell me what happened when I, tell me everything!” I demanded rubbing my temples. The corners of his lips turned into a smile.

“Well, everything else is boring so I’ll just skip to the part where you declared your love for Frank Anthony Iero.” Fucking cheeky bastard I hissed to myself. “Well you were blacked out, Mikey was ready to give you CPR but then that’s when you mumbled sheepishly about Frank, well, technically you were half awake, you looked wasted honest…”

“What happened?” Ray asked laughing with a drink in hand. “You like Frank?”

“Gah! Ray shut up!” I argued, Gerard looked dumbfounded just standing there wondering where the fucking Ray came from.

“Aw hunny, that’s so sweet. Hey Bob! Guess what!?” Ray called out.

With a throbbing head I pounced on Ray taping his mouth shut with my hands.

“What Ray!?” Bob yelled back.

“Aiden… likes…” Ray got out through the gaps between my fingers

“Ray nooo…” I whined, Gerard came and strapped his arms around Ray top get a hold of him, but it was too late.

“FRANK!” he squealed.

My first reaction was Frank; I looked up to see his face flush bright red.

“Ray your lying!” Bob argued. For some reason I stopped I took my hands from Ray’s dirty mouth and let them hang from my sides just staring in Frank’s direction.

Once I unglued my feet from the pavement I ran in to the building. As I got to the door I felt my cheeks light up, I felt it burn red, and frustration soon took over. I leaned against the wall near the door feeling more embarrassed then ever and sat on the floor with my eyes closed; just listening, listening to my breathing and the faint voices from outside. Fuck Frank and his gorgeousness; fuck him for being so nice and thoughtful and wonderful and patience and caring.

I slumped down to the floor again and held my arms tight around my legs. To my surprised a rather puffed out Gerard came bursting in through the doors.

“Why’d you go?” he smiled after getting his breath back. Gerard always seems to be happy, even in the most shit situations he always finds something to smile about. It’s one of the things I hate about Gerard. His contagious smile.

“What do you think? How many people know about this?”

Before Gerard got to his explaining, laughter erupted loudly from outside. I slowly got up with hands held to my temples and peeked through the gap between the doors.

They chanted and laughed, making fun of me and Frank. Teasing us, more so me than Frank.

"She's a freak, honestly man, don't." one said.

"Look at me... I'm Aiden, I think I have a shot at Frank." another mocked

“Aiden and Frankie sitting in the tree, F, U, C, K, I, N, G!” they sang aloud.

I sat there feeling my eyes sting, as I watched Frank with anticipation.

“Aiden?” Gerard spoke placing his hand on my shoulder.

“Fuck you’s man! I don’t even like her! Shit man, she's not even important. I mean, c'mon, she's just one in all the girls that fall for me, pssh!" Frank blurted out after finishing their childish song.

"Ooo... All defensive now Iero just because you're embarrassed?" someone asked.

"Whatever, she's nothing." he replied coldly.

My heart sank to the end of a bottom-less pit (even thought that isn't possible, it sure as hell felt like it).