I Will Breathe Fire

Walking around the massive mall wasn’t so enjoyable. I wore huge black sunglasses and a grey hooded jumper over my head. The bandages were still around my knuckles, and every time I would pass my reflection, I was near to convincing myself I would box Frank’s mouth at the party.

“How about this?” Gerard asked waving a long tore outfit, snapping back to reality.

“A witch’s outfit?” i replied looking at him funny.

“Okay… Maybe not.”

I crossed my arms and turned away as Gerard looked through the selection of outfits on the rack. I walked out of the store rocking back and forth on my heels, trying to calm my nerves, trying to forget. I lowered my hood my turned back my glasses and rested them on my head. I stood there minding my own business watching people brush passed each other in a rush, carrying loads of bag around the arms.

“Aiden?”

-ha?

“Aiden, is it really you?”

‘Who the hell was this’ I asked myself, it definitely wasn’t Gerard, for sure it wasn’t. I almost swore when I came face to face with Jack an old friend of mine. Jack in high school, gah he freaked me out. I kind of felt sorry for the guy, when he thought we were going out, emphasis on ‘thought’. Come to think of it, he’s like me to Frank.

After I cut it off, making it final that I didn’t like him the way he did, he sort of broke down. He went all deathly freaky on me. He would follow me everywhere, not in plain sight but he was there, he was around. Once he watched me sleep through my bedroom window. He just really freaked me out okay. He didn’t really have friends to go to; come to think of it, I was the only friend he had. He stalked me down for months, but I don’t think I did anything wrong. I felt really bad, I apologized, I really did. But then after Gerard found out about Jack, he kind of took ‘care’ of him. He then moved close after that and I had never saw he again… until now.

“Jack?” I asked shakily.

“Aiden, it is you, how you been?” Jack asked pulling me into a bear hug rendering me helpless.

“I-I’m o-kay…” I choked. “How are y-you? Loo-ng ti-me.”

“Too long.” He replied still holding onto me. His head rested on mine as he began to rub circles on my back, taking a sniff of my hair. ‘Eww! Get off!’ was all that was said in my head. I pushed off him gently and took as many steps as I could away from him, but that Jack kept coming toward me.

“Where you going Sweetie?”

Yuk! I felt like cutting out my ears. ‘Sweetie?’ who the hell are you calling sweetie mister.

“No where I…”

“Then come here and talk to me Doll.”

He grabbed a hold of my hand and took me over to the railing outlining the fifth floor balcony. I wasn’t in the mood to make small talk but I’ll try my best to be nice, after all it was me who did this to him, in a way.

“So how long are you down here for?” I questioned trying my best not to twitch.

“I’m here for Frank's Birthday Party.”

“Oh, yeah, that party. Alright.”

“You’re going right?”

“Ah, yeah…”

“So what are you doing here?”

“Gerard and I,” I began, stressing Gerard’s name. “Are shopping for a costume for Frank's Party, I guess.”

“Oh, well sorry for taking you…”

“Aiden!?” I heard Gerard call.

“Oh. Sorry, have to go! Bye!” I gave him a faint kiss on the cheek and ran my ass into Gerard’s arms, disappearing into the costume store. I pulled Gerard from the opened doors and dragged him all the way to the empty change room and locked it. There wasn’t much space, but I made us fit.

My faces was lost of expression as I slumped down using up the rest of the space in the change room. I rubbed my face and temples trying to relieve the stress that slowly started to build.

“Aiden?”

“I can’t do this?”

“Why? Where were you?”

“Jack is back, I just met him outside.”

“What!”

“Keep your voice down,” I hushed Gerard bringing him to the same level as I was on the floor.

“I can’t do this...”

I couldn't handle the added pressure, it was too much.

“Yes you can, you’re stronger than this; you just have to believe you can.”

My eyes began to flicker, is there hope? Is there really hope of me getting over Frank and away from Jack forever? Gerard thinks so. Is Gerard really good for me?

Sometimes I feel people want more than what I can give. But I can’t find it in me to say ‘no’. Can I do this? Gerard thinks so, why can’t I?

“I can’t do this alone.”

“You won’t have to, I’ll be with you.”

“Thank-you so much.” I sighed in relief, pulling Gerard into a half standing half sitting embrace.

Not being able to support our weight any longer Gerard fell hard on top of me with a loud thud. We both erupted into a heap of hysterics. We began to tangling ourselves even more every time we tried to get ourselves out, while cheekily stealing eye contact every now and again.

Why couldn’t I have loved him before?

Why now?