Can't Stop, Won't Stop

On that day, that day
The day I walked away in December
I will always remember
I’ll regret it forever

I remember brown eyes
So sad and blue skies
Turned to darkness and night
I’m so sick of the fight

“Sunny?”

I won’t breathe unless you breathe
Won’t bleed unless you bleed
Won’t be unless you be
‘Til I’m gone and I can sleep

I heard my radio being shut off.

“Hey!” I whined, “I was listening to that!”

“You don’t need to listen to that.”

“It’s your own song, why wouldn’t you want me listening to it?”

He sighed, “Bad memories.”

“You know, you never told me what this song was about, George.”

He was silent for a moment, “I don’t think I’ll ever tell you.”

I sat up and crossed my legs on my bed Indian style, “Why not?”

“It’s-it’s not important.”

I huffed, “It’s obviously important if you wrote a song about it.”

He sighed again, “It’s…very important. It’s just…not important for you to know.”

I crossed my arms over my chest in a childish gesture, “You’ll tell me one day. I know you will.”

He let out a small laugh, “Stubborn, aren’t you?”

I smiled, “You know it!”

He laughed, “Right. Well we’re all going out today. Coming?”

My face lit up, “Really? Where are we going?”

“No idea. Just walking around, a park maybe or something.”

“Great! Let’s go!” I said excitedly.

“Um, don’t you think you should change first? I mean, you’re only wearing pajamas."

I scoffed, “Not to go downstairs and eat breakfast.”

“But the rest of the guys are down there-”

I cut him off, “Really? I have to see them!”

“Um, Sunny-”

“Huh? Oh yeah! I can’t see!” I giggled.

I jumped off my bed and headed for the door. I slipped on my bunny slippers and turned to face the direction I thought George was, “Coming?”

“Yep,” he said. I heard his footsteps getting closer as he followed me out of the room and down the hall.

I walked straight through the living room and into the kitchen of Jorel’s apartment. I knew my way well around here. No one needed to guide me.

“Morning, Sunny baby!”

I turned to the voice, a smile on my face, “Morning, Dilly-bar!”

He ran over to me and scooped me up in his arms, twirling me around.

I giggled, “Dillon! Put me down!”

He set me down and I stumbled back a couple steps, bumping into someone else.

“Hey there, gorgeous.”

I turned around and wrapped my arms around the person, “Deuce Deuce!”

He laughed, “Hey, baby, how you doin’?”

“Fine, now that you’re here,” I winked at him.

“Hey guys how’s the-Sunny?”

“Jorel!” I smiled. I heard him, now I just needed to find him…

I reached my hands out in the direction I thought he was and grabbed around.

“Jorel?”

“Sorry to disappoint you, sweet cheeks, but that’s not my name.”

I put my hands on my hips, “Nice to see you too Jordan. Now move so I can find Jorel!”

I could hear the smirk in his voice, “Nah, I’m not giving up this view.”

A smack was heard and Jordan spoke again, “Hey!”

“Don’t look at her like that!”

“Jorel!” I yelled again, throwing myself at him and hugging him tightly.

He laughed and hugged me back, holding me against him protectively.

“Stop looking at her like that, guys!”

“Us? What about the way you are looking at her right now?” George said accusingly.

Jorel scoffed, “I’m not looking at her any way…”

Dillon laughed, “Yeah, sure man.”

“Seriously,” George said, walking over to where Jorel was still holding me, “You’re practically drooling right now.”

“Pfft. I am not.”

Even though I was still in Jorel’s death hug, I felt someone try to squeeze in the small space behind us and the counter. This person also rubbed their hand across my butt.

“Excuse me.”

I turned around, laughing, “Did you just grope my ass, Matt?”

“What? Me? No…”

Jorel was probably scowling right now, “Not cool, man.”

“You’re just jealous because she wouldn’t let you get away with that,” Jordan said.

Jorel gasped, “What? Of course she would let me get away with it!”

I laughed, realizing the guys had already forgotten that I was still in the same room. In Jorel’s arms, nonetheless.

“Try it,” Aron said. He probably found this amusing. Weirdo.

I pretended to look around and not pay attention to the conversation going on around me. I had to hide the smile that threatened to come across my face as Jorel’s hands made their way from my back to rest on my butt.

Finally I couldn’t hold it anymore. I started laughing uncontrollably, though my laughs were muffled by Jorel’s chest.

Jorel didn’t move his hands, but squeezed my ass instead. I let out a squeak and jumped. He finally let go of me and laughed, the rest of the guys joining in.

I smacked Jorel lightly and took a couple steps away, “That was not funny!”

He took a deep breath, trying to stop laughing, “Oh, it was great. That noise you made? Priceless! And you did it just for me!”

Somehow I had to get my revenge, so I sauntered back over to Jorel, making a point of swaying my hips. He stopped laughing.

So far so good…

I grabbed him by his shirt and pulled him towards me. His neck was hunched as his forehead was pressed against mine.

I hated being short.

“That’s not the only noise I’ll make for you,” I said, my voice soft and what I hoped was sultry.

A few random noises escaped Jorel’s mouth, but he said nothing.

Success.

I continued my swagger as I walked out of the kitchen. Someone slapped me on the ass and I walked past.

“Thanks, Aron.”

“Anytime baby,” he said. He was probably winking at me right now. Weirdo.

“I will never understand how she always knows who it is,” I heard George say, his voice getting softer as I got farther away from the kitchen.

“Whose turn is it to help me get dressed?” I called from the hallway.

“MINE!”

Chairs screeched and I could hear the guys bickering back and forth about who would help me.

I scoffed. Boys.

“I’m thinking of a number between 1 and 10. What is it?” I yelled.

“8!”

“2!”

“5!”

“10. Like you, sexy.”

I laughed loudly, “Alright Dillon, you win.”

“Oh! What now, bitches!?”

I continued to laugh as I heard Dillon approach. I wandered into the bedroom.

“Kiss Ass!”

“Suck-up!”

Dillon ignored the guys and followed me in. I was surprised he didn’t close the door. Most of the guys try to do that.

I sighed, “What do you think I should wear, Dil?”

He was silent, but I heard him walk over to my closet, which was way too tiny, might I add, and open the door.

“Mhm….ooh that’s nice…nah…doesn’t show enough skin…mhm…”

I stood in the middle of my room, amused by Dillon’s mumbles.

He threw some clothes on my bed, “There. I made you look even sexier, if that’s possible.”

I laughed and started to push him towards the door, “Thanks. Now excuse me while I change.”

“Aww c’mon!” he whined. I could imagine him pouting, “Don’t you need help putting your clothes on?”

“I’m pretty sure I got it. But I’ll call you in if I need help,” I said, knowing he’d probably stand outside my door and listen to me change anyway.

You learn these things after a while.

“Sounds good, Sunny baby.”

I suddenly felt dirty, and decided I needed a shower. I walked over to the door and knocked on it.

Dillon spoke through the door, “Yes?”

“I’m gunna take a shower, kay?”

“You got it.”

I opened the door and walked down the hall to the bathroom, Dillon following.

Now, I know what you’re thinking, but no. Dillon was not showering with me. I don’t need help with that, thanks.

See, the lock on the bathroom is broken, so when I shower I usually have one of the guys stand on lookout for me.

Not Aron, though. He doesn’t do a very good job of making sure everyone knows I’m in there and they can’t try to take a shower.

Closing the door behind me I called through it, “Don’t let anyone in!”

“Yeah, yeah, I got it.”

Not 5 minutes into my shower and I heard a knock on the door.

My hair was currently covered in shampoo and I sighed, “Who is it?”

“Dillon. But Matt needs to take a piss.”

I huffed, “Can’t Mr. Pussy Snake wait until I’m done?”

“No I can’t!” I heard Matt yell from outside.

“Hey man! I know you scream in the band but you don’t need to do it in my ear!” Dillon shouted.

“Sorry…”

“You can come in, Matt. Just…don’t look through the curtain, okay?” I said. I was a bit worried. The curtain was white, almost clear, Jorel told me. He didn’t want anyone walking in and seeing something they shouldn’t while I was showering.

Yet he did it all the time.

“I won’t!” he said, and I could hear the door open. He closed it behind him and walked over to the toilet.

It was a bit awkward, washing my hair while Matt pissed and Dillon yelled at him from outside.

He finished his business and left me to shower in peace.

“Dillon? You still out there?” I called.

I really hoped he didn’t leave. I hate the feeling of being alone, but, when you’re blind you always feel alone. You can’t see anyone, so you never know if they’re there. People's voices always sound so far away. I always fear the guys will leave me, and I'll have no one and no where to go. The thought scares me.

“Yep. Still here.”

I sighed in relief, “Good.”