I Wanna Live a Life From a New Perspective

(Brendon)

I cannot believe he’s all cuddly with her in the bunk section. I said to apologize, not woo her. I sat on the couch and rolled my eyes.

“PMS much?” Spencer asked glancing up at me.

I just huffed and crossed my arms. So, I can act like a diva when I want to. I saw Jon heading back to the bunks and laid my head on the back of the couch. A few minutes later the bus halted to a stop.

“-Yeah, but Spencer was so ticked, and…” Ryan rambled on to Jess as they came out of the bunks. I rolled my eyes and stood up.

“Hey, we’re working on rooming arrangements.” I cut into the conversation. Ryan paused and glanced at me confused muttering a delayed ‘Okay…’

“Yeah,” I nodded, “And I need to talk to you about a problem with this, uh,” I scratched my head, “This music-writing block that I’m going through.”

“I was not aware you were in a music-writing block…” Ryan squinted.

I nodded, “Yeah, so, preferably now, I’d like to discuss it…privately.”

“Alright.” He nodded.

We headed off the bus and Jess headed off to talk to Jon, as I walked to the front of the bus with Ryan.

“So, what’s really up?” He asked.

“Why are you all over Jess?” I quickly added, “I mean, we shouldn’t be all in her space so soon, it’d probably annoy her, and she doesn’t want four deprived males flirting with her.”

“I was just talking to her.”

“Just talking?” I cried, my eyes widening, “You were all cuddly in her bunk and then you’re telling her all about your life, which is kind of personal, and are like, ‘yeah, and me and my girlfriend are over, by the way’.”

“What are you even insinuating?!” He laughed, “You’re so freaking jealous. I’m not putting the moves on Jess.”

“Well, it kind of seems that way.”

“You’re such a freak, this is just like the first tour.” Ryan snapped pushing me.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked pushing him back.

“It means that I’m referring back to the first tour, when I had coffee with your girlfriend and you flipped out! You’re so possessive! She’s not even dating you! For all you know, she could’ve had sex with Spencer last night!”

“Shut up.” I snapped, slapping his arm, “You’re such a jerk.”

“You’re such a kid.” He retorted, shoving me so hard that I stumbled into the front of the bus. I shook my head before leaping on him, and from there it was batting hands and arms. We stumbled to the ground eventually, and ended up rolling a bit towards a curb. We got Spencer’s attention a few moments later.

“Guys!” He yelled, trying to intervene without getting hurt. Jon ran over next, grabbing at my shoulders, but I shook him off.

“Stop, Brendon.” Ryan snapped, still batting at me.

“You stop!” I retorted as we flipped again. I put all my strength into it, and rolled back over ontop of him, emitting a sharp cry out of him as he hit the ground. I noticed suddenly that he was limp. I sat up a bit, wiping the sweat off my forehead and noticing that we had rolled too far and I just slammed Ryan’s head effectively down onto the curb.

“Shit,” I cursed, wide eyed, “Ryan, wake up, no, dude, I didn’t mean it. I’ll stop, just wake the fuck up!” I groaned pulling his head up carefully. I instantly felt stupid -like I was a kid throwing a temper tantrum then I accidentally went too far and broke the TV set. If I would’ve just stopped and not overreacted, I thought miserably.

“Ryan?” Spencer questioned dropping to his knees, “Zack!” He yelled. He put his hand on Ryan’s neck and felt a soft, but still there, pulse.

“What was that all about?” Spencer snapped as I stared down at Ryan’s limp body, wide eyed.

“We just got into a disagreement, and we just overreacted, I-I don’t know.” I shook my head, babbling nonsense.

“Where’d Jess go?” Spencer asked Jon, and Jon glanced behind him to see, no one, except Zack running up.

“I don’t know.” Jon said, “Maybe she’s calling help.”

Oh, no. Help meant an ambulance, right? No, no no! I glanced at Spencer and before I knew it, Zack was lifting Ryan up carefully, and telling Spencer something, then he turned to me and I just squinted. Nothing was making sense.

“Brendon.” Jon said, putting a firm hand on my shoulder.

I jumped glancing up at him. He pulled me to my feet and put a steadying arm around my shoulder, “We’re taking him onto the bus, until we can get an ambulance here.”

Brendon nodded, glancing down to the sticky blood on his hands and then back up at Jon, who was leading me onto the bus as well. Spencer was keeping a hand around Ryan’s wrist, making sure his heart kept on beating, while Zack wetted a washcloth and started dabbing at the blood and dirt messed in his hair and at the back of his head. I didn’t see Jess. I left Jon’s side and headed into the lounge, not there either, the bunk curtains were all open, and I quietly knocked on the door.

I heard nothing, “Jess?". Still nothing. I pushed open the door and glanced in, seeing Jess sitting on the floor, back against the shower, breathing even, and eyes alert.

“Hey, you okay?” I asked, trying to ignore the pain when I saw her flinch. She glanced up at me, shaking her head a bit as if clearing herself from a haze, “I just want to be alone for a bit.” She said hoarsely and in a monotone, no life in her voice. I nodded, squinting and shutting the door back.

“I don’t think Jess called an ambulance.” I told Zack, who nodded and quickly pulled out his cell phone, passing the washcloth to Spencer, who tried to stop the bleeding without applying too much pressure to Ryan’s head.

It felt like hours that we sat there before we heard the sirens. Zack quickly got Ryan off the bus, while Jon stood by and flagged down the ambulance. I glanced at Spencer, before telling Jon and Zack that we should go on and get the bus to head towards the hospital. Spencer was riding in the back with Ryan.

They agreed and we let them get Ryan safely into the back as we headed onto the bus and left the parking lot.

Jess hadn’t come out of the bathroom and I glanced at Jon, lowering my voice to a whisper.

“I’m worried about Jess.”

“Why?” He asked glancing around.

“Shh,” I hushed him, “She’s sitting in the bathroom, with no expression, at all.”

“She’s probably just a little shell shocked.” Jon said quietly, this time.

“No, Jon, this was,” I shook my head, “This was weird.”