I Wanna Live a Life From a New Perspective

Jess

I headed towards Jon as Brendon walked away with Ryan.

“So, are you already super sick of the bus and you’re glad that we’re off?” Jon asked.

“Not really, I mean, I guess eventually I will be, but not right now anyway.” I shrugged.

“That’s good, but just wait. It’ll hit you in a few days.”

“I think I’ll have to wait for the initial shock of being on a tour bus with,” I paused with my favorite band was what I was going to say, “With beds and a mini-kitchen will have to wear off before that happens.” I covered up, nodding.

“Yeah, that’s true.” He laughed. We walked in silence for a few more moments until I heard a small ‘thump’ noise. I turned to see Brendon had stumbled into the bus, and he reached forward towards Ryan. I flinched a bit, and took a step back, gasping when Brendon completely attacked him.

“What?” Jon started to say, before turning and glancing at Brendon and Ryan.

“Spencer, Zack!” He called motioning towards the pair. Spencer jogged towards them, and by now they were on the ground. I stood frozen in my spot as Jon and Zack followed. I glanced behind me, then glanced in front of me, trying to look for an escape. I cautiously walked towards the bus, shielding myself behind the corner, before I saw Brendon flip Ryan over, his head connecting with the curb. I hurried into the bus and into the bathroom, curling up on the floor and squeezing my eyes shut.


“You’re a skank.” James snapped, “And stop trying to convince me otherwise. I put up with you, so just shut the fuck up.”

I whimpered and avoiding his eyes, as he spoke.

“And look at me, when I’m talking to you.” He snapped, grabbing my jaw and squeezing. I blinked furiously trying to keep back the tears. He laughed a bit.

“So, do you want to tell me the real reason you were talking to that guy at the club?”

“James, I was just getting another drink, I swear, I would never,”

“Shut up.” He snapped, “I gave you a chance to explain yourself, but you just won’t tell me the truth.” He exaggerated the last word by pushing my head back until it hit the wall behind it. I clenched my eyes shut.

“No, please, I’m sorry-”

I was cut off by him laughing again, “You’re pathetic.” He sneered.

“Jess?” I was pulled out of my thoughts by a voice. I glanced up at the door quickly, freezing when it was pushed open.

“Hey, you okay?” He said. I flinched and subconsciously scooted back further, willing my voice to work and not show my fear.

“I just want to be alone for a little bit.” I muttered. He nodded, and closed the door, I breathed heavily in relief and tried to clear my thoughts and not think about anything.

---

It seemed like hours before the bus halted to a stop. I slowly pushed myself off the floor, wincing when my knees cracked and leaning over the sink. I turned it on, splashing some water on my face and wiping my eyes. I was drying my face and rinsing off my hands when there was a knock on the door.

“Hmm?” I hummed.

“Hey, we’re at the hospital, so come on, we’re going in.” It was Jon’s voice this time.

“Yeah,” I muttered, and cleared my throat, “I’ll be out in a second.”

I could hear his footsteps fade and dried my hands, patting down my hair and exiting the bathroom, only kind of shaking.

“You okay?” Jon asked when I stepped off the bus. I nodded slowly. He glanced at me cautiously, before putting an arm around my shoulder and leading me into the hospital. Normally, I would’ve flinched at the contact, but this was more comforting, and I sighed in relief. I tried to ignore the smell and brightness of the hospital, imagining that I was back on the bus.

We entered the waiting room and I glanced at the chairs to see Spencer, Brendon, and Zack sitting side by side. Jon gave my shoulder a squeeze, before sitting beside Spencer. I sat on his other side staring at the floor, and trying to ignore the familiar scent of what words can only describe as ‘hospital’. I closed my eyes and leaned forward, resting my elbows on my knees.


“Stay with us, just a little longer, Jess.” A nurse muttered and I could hear the faint ‘beeping’ of the heart monitor.

I faintly felt them hooking up an IV drop and could hear fragments of their conversation.

“-losing a lot of blood.”

“-fell down her apartment’s staircase?”

I was out cold after that.

---

“Jess, honey,” I heard his voice, slowly opening my eyes, “You scared me so bad!” He exclaimed relieved, kissing me, “Be more careful, babe, please.” He sighed, grabbing my hand. I looked at him confused before glancing over at the doctor.

“So, what exactly caused the trama to the head?” She asked holding up her pad and pen.

“She was taking our laundry down to the machines on the first floor, and lost her footing, scared me to death.” James said squeezing my hand tighter.

“Is this true?” the doctor asked. James squeezed my hand again, and I glanced at him. He gave me a smile that looked sickeningly dangerous.

“Yes.” I nodded.

“Are you here for Mr. Ross?” A voice cut me out of my thoughts.

“Yes.” Zack answered. I glanced up to see a nurse.

“Follow me.” She replied. Zack stood up, ushering Spencer, Brendon, and Jon down the hallway. I got up and followed behind slowly, carefully, not listening as Spencer spoke with the nurse. I’d rather not know the details.

We got to a room and the nurse pushed open a door. I pointedly did not look at the bed.

After everyone had seen Ryan, who was apparently fine. He just busted his head open. Lovely. I could tell that they wanted to ask what was up, so I gave them a crappy answer.

“I’m squeamish.”

“I swear, there’s no blood.” Ryan said, suddenly.

“Yeah, no, I’m fine over here.” I nodded, not taking my eyes off the floor.

“Suit yourself.” Ryan snorted. After that Spencer, Jon, Zack, and I exited the hospital room, to let Ryan and Brendon work some things out.

---

Brendon

“Ryan,” I started, “Damn, I’m such an idiot, I’m so sorry.”

Ryan was silent, I glanced up at him sheepishly.

“Continue.” Was all he said.

“I know that you’re classier than to try to lay some random girl that I bring on the bus, and I should’ve known better. I over reacted and I feel really embarrassed and stupid.”

“And?”

“What?” I asked squinting at him.

“You were…”

“Out of line?”

“No,” He rolled his eyes, “I think this rhymes with Ellis.”

“Ellis?” I squinted again, before frowning and sighing, “I’m sorry, and I was.” I paused mumbling, “Jealous.”

“Couldn’t hear you.” Ryan stated, “What was that?”

“I was jealous, Ryan! Gosh, okay, I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright.” He smirked, holding open his arms, “Hug it out?”

I rolled my eyes, before heading towards the bed, and leaning over it awkwardly.

“Man, but what was up with Jess?”

“I don’t know. You should’ve seen her on the bus right after,” Brendon cut his sentence short.

“What was up?” Ryan asked.

“Well, after I,” I paused, “And after you,”

“Yes.” Ryan laughed.

“We were all like ‘Well, where’s Jess? Maybe she’s getting help or something.’ So we get on the bus and I glanced around and look for her, cause seriously it’s like a bus, where could she go? So, she’s sitting on the bathroom floor looking terrified. Then she tells me she just wants some ‘time alone’.”

“Oh,” Ryan muttered, sounding like he knew what was up.

“Wait, do you know something I don’t?”

“No, it’s just.” He shrugged, “Maybe it was shell-shock.”

“That’s what Jon said!” I exclaimed, “But man, it wasn’t you should’ve seen this, it was so not shell-shock.”

“Hmm.” He shrugged.

---

Jess

We went to the hospital’s gift shop, which was a bit more comforting in the sense that it smelled more like old people than hospital and glanced around.

I glanced around and saw Zack and Spencer buying something at the counter. I glanced to Jon who shrugged.

We talked to the doctor some more and Ryan could go tonight, considering there wasn’t much damage, he just lost a bit of blood. He’ll just need to keep the bandage –which his hair covers….for the most part- on his head and apply this ointment nasty stuff until the cut is healed.

“Hey, man.” Spencer greeted as we re-entered Ryan’s room to find Ryan and Brendon watching TV and laughing.

“Hey.” They both said simultaneously. Ryan glancing at me, slowly. I lowered my head.

“Merry Christmas,” Spencer laid some clothes on the end of the bed with a bag on top of them, “We’re leaving, put them on.”

Ryan grabbed the bag, and pulled out a pink card.

“Congratulations on your new addition! She’s truly a miracle.” He read off the front before opening it, and reading some cheesy joke about naming the kid after them.

“Dude, you didn’t even sign it.”

“Well, there, that way you can re-gift it.” Zack joked, “But seriously, get dressed.”

Ryan sighed, slipping back the covers and starting to pull the pants on under the gown.

“Yeah, no.” I muttered, turning and exiting the room. I heard Jon and Spencer snorting out their laughter as the door closed.