Walls

(Magie)

I can’t believe I downgraded myself to this.

Not that Alex is below me or anything, but drunken sex on the first make-up date with your ex, that’s below me.

It’s been a week since the incident, or rather accident.

I haven’t talked to Alex. I refuse to.

I left after realizing it was him. I doubt he even remembers the night.

Jack seems concerned, but he’s smart enough not to push me when I act like this.
I was scared and felt lonely and I knew the only person that could make me feel better would also make me feel the worst.

But today I was determined to get out of this self pity.

I had to leave my bedroom. I had to eat. I had to shower. I had to leave this apartment.
After I had done all these things and was sitting in my car, I just sat there staring at the steering wheel. I had no idea where to go.

I was stuck. I felt trapped in this town. Like no matter where I went, I would see him. I had to leave. I had no idea where to go.

I just began to drive and let the car took me where it wanted to go.

After hours of driving, I arrived somewhere that used to be familiar to me. I wanted to the door and rang the bell.

And then he answered the door “Hey” he said with a devilish smile

“Hey” I smiled back.

(Alex)

I had ruined what was supposed to be our perfect evening.

I can barely remember it, but from what I do remember, it was amazing. I remember the movie, how she laughed, and how that made me smile. I remember going to a bar for dinner and how she got her regular drink, Long Island Ice Tea, and how we both drank way too much. The rest was blur.

I wanted to see her, but Jack won’t let me.

He said that ever since she came the next day, she’s been out of it. And if she came home the next day, we probably did some inappropriate in my bedroom.

I’ve just wanted her back in my life and the one time I try to, I fail horribly.

But today I was going to her apartment and was going to make this right. I don’t care if Jack tried to stop me or if she didn’t want me there. I was going to make this better.

I wasn’t going to bring anything; I wanted her just to be happy to see me. But I did remember how much she loves candy.

So here I was, standing at her doorstep, box of candy in my hand.

I rang the bell. And then, there was Jack.

“Hey” I said throwing on my biggest smile.

He just continued to glare at me.

“Is Magie home?”

He just kept looking at me

“Jack you know how much she means to me. You out of anybody knows that best. You know I would never plan on hurting her.”

“Well Alex, lets just say this isn’t the first time that you’ve hurt her. Or used her. Or broken her. And I’m her big brother way before I’m your best friend. I don’t give a shit about your feelings when I’m being protective older brother.”

He had a point, but I still wanted to see my girl.

“Jack, you know she needs me as much I need her.”

“Even if that cheesy line was true, she’s not home right now.”

“Where is she then?”

“Even if I did know where she is, I wouldn’t let you know.” He tried to say in his angriest voice.

“Well then, can I come in?”

“Hell yeah! I got the new Call of Duty yesterday and I’ve been waiting for you to play with it.”

Not all the afternoon I planned to have, but sounds good all the same.

(Magie)

“Magie, I just don’t understand why you would ever want to go back that douche. I mean I saw what he did to you. He ruined you. You looked dead for nearly a year. I mean even when we got together, I knew you were happy. But anytime his name was mentioned or even his band, you looked like you were ready to jump off a cliff.”

“I know that, but that still doesn’t mean I don’t like underneath that all. I mean, I think I’ll always love him a little, no matter who I end up with.”

“I understand that completely, because I’m hung up on a girl the same way. But you also have to realize what’s good and right for you and what’s not. And Alex is definitely not good for you.”

“Then what is?”

“Me?”

And with that he leaned in and kissed me on lips.

Something in me wanted to stop kissing him. To pull away and yell at him for doing this and leave

But something even stronger and louder told me to keep kissing him and follow him into the bedroom.

And I listened to that second voice.