Be a Man

“Hey,” Austin greeted, as he sauntered over. He had less of his usual confidence, I thought. “What’s up?”

“Hello.” I said, opting to go for the civil approach. “Nothing. You?”

Taken aback for just a few moments, Austin covered it up by pulling out his chair.

“Same as usual.” he finally said, after settling down. “I’m going to be blunt. How far through dinner do you think you’ll be able to resist the temptation to start shouting?”

I grimaced, but replied, “It is my intent to succeed in making it all the way through dinner. Mr. Preston.”

“Then, may luck be with us.” He held out his hand, and after a brief debate with myself, I shook it. “We’ll need it.”

Perhaps the scraping of chairs that was his parents sitting down disguised my snort of amusement, because Austin didn’t seem to notice. And then our usual waiter came over, grinning like the dumb bimbo she is, and of course, began flirting with Austin immediately.

“Oh, Austin! Nice to see you again! Will it be your usual - the eight ounce steak with A1, a baked potato, green beans, a Dr. Pepper, and a chef’s salad?”

My look of disgust was clearly visible to Austin - thankfully, though, the waitress’s back was to me.

“Um, no, actually.” he finally said.

“Oh.” she seemed put out, but then asked, chipper again, “then what can I get you this evening?”

“If you wouldn’t mind, I’d like a moment to think --”

“Alright. I’ll go ask Mr. and Mrs. --”

“So, can you take Anna’s order here real quick?”

The bimbo faltered, then hitched her grin back, declaring that ‘of course’ she would, but when she looked at me, the smile was false.

“What can I get you?”

“What, you don’t have my usual memorized like dear Austin’s?” I snorted. “The spaghetti, with just a glass of water.”

“You usually don’t have water with it,” the waitress said snidely, scribbling on her paper.

“Actually, she does,” Austin said, and the waitress turned back to him, grin already in place.

“Well, she doesn’t usually, but she might have had sometime --”

“She has always gotten water with it.”

It was here that I could clearly see that Austin was angry. The glare I had believed to be reserved for any person who threatened me was hitched on his handsome features - it seemed to have appeared just as easily as the waitress’s own falsely cheery smile towards everyone but him. He was downright glowering at the waitress.

“Austin…” I said in a low voice, warningly. He looked at me, as though shocked at what I’d picked up on, but the waitress shot me a glare.

“I’ll have the same as Anna,” Austin finally said. “And if you don’t mind, I’d appreciate it if you stopped fawning over me and shooting Anna death glares, because it’s rather pathetic, and it’s annoying, and I’d much rather be in a dump with Anna than anywhere with you.”

“Austin!” I said, nearly hissing at him for his rudeness.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” the waitress said through her teeth. “I’ll have that to you as soon as I can!”

“I hope she leaves me alone…” he mumbled, more to himself than to me.

“I wouldn’t be surprised if she did!” I retorted, shocking him. “That was unnecessarily rude!”

“I can’t stand it,” he said, making a sudden movement to put his elbows on our table and face me. “I can’t stand that all she ever does is ask me if everything’s okay, and ask me if I’d like anything else. I can’t see how she can just ignore you because you’re the one sitting by me instead of her. How can it not get to you?!”

“It get’s to me,” I said in a low voice, “but if I have the sense to stay quiet, what gives you the right to offend her?”

“You don’t understand,” Austin replied. “You wouldn’t understand. You probably wouldn’t even try to understand if I told you.”

“Try me, Austin Preston, try me.” I hissed, almost inaudibly.

“Anna,” he said, sighing, “Please don’t be like this, not now.”

“Why?” I said, plowing on. “Why can’t I be myself? The me you expected me to be the minute you walked in?”

“Because it’s the you I met the first night I moved here that’s the real you, not the one I see every day!” he muttered back. “The real you, Anna, is afraid! You don’t want to let me in because of the arrogant asshole I used to be and…and still am! ‘Be a man’, you told me. Be a man. That’s what I’m trying to be, I’m trying! But…all you’re doing is sinking deeper and deeper into what you’ve become, and not who you are.” Austin paused, massaging his temple. “You’re not who you seem to be, don’t you get it? It’s not fooling me…so why are you trying to fool yourself?”