The Fourth Drink Instinct

At the age of 15, Alex shouldn’t be in a bar, but with his fake ID he sat at the bar, lonely and very, very brave, drink in hand. He doesn’t deserve to be in a place like that, all alone. Alex found out his sexuality early, he knew he was gay. He got bullied for it, so the only thing he could do to make himself feel better was get hold of a fake ID and drink his troubles away. He had the worst idea ever, and entered the local gay bar.

He doesn’t deserve to be in a place like this
All alone, he’s under age and so very very brave
A fake ID lines his credibility.
He sits at the bar, the gents are gonna try so hard.

The bar tender pretended to pretend that he was concerned. His black hair slick, his brown eyes sparkling under the dim disco lights, making him look sexy to the young boy. The bar tenders slim figure was perfect, his tight top showing his muscles perfectly and the look in his eyes just spelt out his desperate attitude

“Boy you’re at your best, have another drink?”

“No, just one more” Alex slurred.

He reached under the bar for a clean glass, pulling one out and shuffling glasses around making sure the cocktail has the perfect amount of vodka in. He passed over the drink, watching the boy gulp it down, the look of need of comfort shone brightly from his eyes and stance. The bar tender smirked as he watched Alex down the drink within minutes, knowing, if he carries on like this he’ll be legless.

“Another, treat yourself, you look like you need it...” The bar tender said with a fake smile.

“One more then...” Alex slurred placing his head in his hands.

Alex stared at the bar tender as he prepared his drink for him. Alex’s silver eyes scanning over his body. His scruffy brown hair fell over his eyes, he moved it straight away, it was blocking his vision of the man in front of him... he knew he was only buying more and more drinks to impress the bar tender.

So the bar tender pretends to pretend that he’s concerned.
He said, ‘Boy, you’re at your best, when you’re so burned’
And her slurs ‘no no, just one more’ and one turns into four.
After two more drinks Alex is hammered. With it being one in the morning the bar was closing, the bar tenders shift had finished. Alex pulls the bar tenders tie and presses his lips against his. Soon after the bar tender was leading him to the door.

The Fourth drink instinct is taking over,
And the gentleman is leading him towards the door.

Going back to the hostel Alex was living at was a smooth journey. His parents kicked him out when they found out he was gay, that just made his life even worse, turning to drink was the only option. The bar tender kissed at his neck and complemented Alex greatly on his looks. Leaving a love bite, the bar tender paid off the taxi and pushed the door open to Alex’s room. The bar tender who by this time, Alex had found out his name was Ed, pulled Alex’s T-shirt off kissing his body all over.

Groaning underneath the older man, Alex was vulnerable and still very drunk. Ed took advantage and didn’t prepare Alex. The boy didn’t say no, but Ed had still taken advantage of a 15 year old virgin. Soon after they’d had sex, they both fell asleep, Alex clutching onto Ed tightly. Alex had always dreamt of finding a man as beautiful as Ed and now it happened, he hoped he could talk to him and they could become boyfriends, but for now, all he wanted to do was sleep the alcohol off.

-x-

Early the next morning a shifting about woke Alex up, he sat up in bed, his head banging.

“Where are you going Ed?” Alex whispered, trying not to hurt his own head again.

He watched as Ed awkwardly shifted about, putting his own clothes on. A pain shot up through Alex, where the night before, he had taken for the first time.

So what made you think that he couldn’t find the door in the morning?
When he found the bed so easily in the dark.

“Yeah last night was fun, but just for a one timer...” Ed said with a smirk “You really filled my need...”

Then he left, without a word, he just left. Alex didn’t want to believe it was a one night stand, he wanted to follow him... but that would only cause trouble. Alex had let a gorgeous guy like Ed just walk away, which left him feeling dirty and used. Alex grabbed an old bottle of vodka, downing it, to drown his sorrows. Staring into the mirror, all he could stare at was the bruise that was formed on his neck. Physical and emotional pain and the bruise was left to remind him.

He thought that he could buy happiness by the bottle.

The vodka took its toll, for that night. But when he woke up the next day, all his problems came flooding back, but his innocence was gone forever... due to that one night stand he couldn’t get his head around. Standing in front of the mirror he placed his big cold hand on the bruise and pressed hard feeling the pain it caused.

He smashed the vodka bottle open on a small unit in the hostel. He slid the cold sharp glass across his arms, the warm blood trickling off and onto the dirty white carpet, staining it. Sliding it across his arms multiple times, each time getting closer and closer to his wrist... deeper and deeper.

He slid the bottle one last time over his veins, wincing at the pain it was causing, but he knew... it would be over in minutes.

His eyes became drowsy and he became dizzy. He smiled in the mirror, his pain would be over. He knew he went to the club that night to find someone to solve his problems and prevent doing this... but going to the club that night, and being used just made him end his life so much quicker.
He lay on his bed, each second passed by was like an hour, waiting to dye took too long but as he started drifting out of unconsciousness, the smile on his face was sitting there peacefully. His troubles where now over.

He said it was a one night stand
but the alcohol didn’t let Alex understand.
He said it was a one night stand.
A one night stand.

What made you think that he couldn’t find the door in the morning?
when he found that bed so easily in the dark.