Some Kind of Magic

As the sunlight snuck into the room from small gaps in the curtains it shone upon the motionless bodies in bed. As the sun rose higher in the sky, the rays of sunshine grew brighter causing a chain reaction. The boy’s arm rose from his side and slapped across his eyes. His hand brushed against the girl’s hair next to him, and as his body turned away from the girl he was previously holding, her hair was tugged a little causing her bright blue eyes to flutter open up to the world.

“What the fuck”, were the first words that filled the silent air in the room that held the strong smells of sweat and alcohol. As the smell reached Vanessa’s nose, her eyes widened and every amount of sleep that was trying to take over her mind was gone. Wide awake, she sat up in the bed, letting her eyes trace around the foreign windows and colors. This was not her room, or Alicia’s room.

Inhaling deeply, her eyes shut and her head blindly moved to the side. Pressing her hands into each other, she opened her eyes to the view of the motionless body next to her. Small tuffs of brown hair stuck out from the blankets over him, and as a small grumble left the pile of blankets, Vanessa’s heart rate soared through the roof.

She had slept with him.

Sickness soon washed over her. Every movement she made added to the dizziness in her head and heaviness of her limbs. As she threw the covers off of her body, her eyes scanned over the button up shirt over her, and with that, she shut her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose, taking a deep breath and trying to hold back the strong urge to cry.

‘I’m never drinking again’, Vanessa thought of herself as she slowly got off of the bed and started to make her way across the room. When she reached the door, she froze as a soft mumble left the other side of the room. Freezing in place, she held her breath, waiting to hear the sound again to see if she could just run to the bathroom or she would have to face him now. The first was her ideal wish.

“What…” The silence that followed that one word was deadly. Everything that could have been said or should have been said in the following minute was taken away by the tension in the air. Vanessa knew for a fact that Zach realized what had happened and on the bed, Zach was too afraid to turn around to see if what he expected was true. Last night, he was drunk and didn’t remember much, the only thing he remembered was how perfect he felt when he kissed her.

“Vanessa?” Zach sat up in bed, letting the sheet fall off of his bare chest that was now exposed to the sun seeping into the room. His eyes traced over her, wearing his button up shirt and a pair of black underwear. The feeling that then exploded in his stomach was a mixture of embarrassment, anger, frustration, and alcohol poisoning.

Inhaling sharply, the girl turned around. As their eyes connected, Vanessa started to shake, and within a minute, she was fighting back the urge to cry all of the pain away, but instead she swung open the door and walked through the halls, pushing open every door trying to find the bedroom. When she finally did, she held her body up with the marble around the sink and let a few tears slip from her eyes and end up in her hands.

What had she done?

Ignoring the sickness stirring in her stomach, Vanessa turned away from the medicine cabinet and with a destination set in mind, left the bathroom. Grab her clothes, change, and go home. When she got there, all questions would be ignored, and she’d lock herself in the second bathroom in the house and stay there the whole day, letting all of her emotions come out so the next day she could go back to work like nothing had ever happened.

Of course, the plan was doomed by the second she took a step out of the bathroom.

“Here”, Zach was about two inches away from her, and his body so close brought unsettling memories from the previous night back into her head. Shivering, she brought her eyes up to his hands. In one were two aspirins; in the other was a glass of water.

Taking the things slowly from his hands, she swallowed the pills and then chugged the rest of the water in the cup. When she was done, the boy took back the glass and instead of walking away like she had hoped, stayed there, eyes trying to connect with Vanessa’s.

Not being able to look into her eyes started to kill Zach on the inside. He realized what had happened last night, and that it was probably the one thing that Vanessa didn’t want to happen, but what could they do now? Nothing. It would be their little secret. He wouldn’t tell anyone, and he was almost three hundred percent positive that Vanessa would do the same.

Sighing heavily, he put his hand under Vanessa’s chin and moved it so her eyes were finally aligned with his. “I’m sorry”, her cheeks burnt to a deep red and as she tore her eyes from Zach’s a small bead of salty water slid down her cheek and fell from her jaw. Slowly placing his hands on her cheek, he wiped away the glossy trail it left behind and tried to give her a small smile, but the anger and confusion rushing through her eyes, he couldn’t even smile himself.

“I can’t believe…”, her teeth bit down on her bottom lip to stop anymore words. There was so much she wanted to say, but nothing that seemed appropriate. All at once she wanted to rip his face off and kiss him just to feel the rush of warmth she felt last night. “I need to go”, her teeth failed at containing her words, and with a small push she walked back down the hall and into the bedroom.

Zach’s blood ran cold for a moment, but as he realized what this had really done to her, his shoulder slumped forward and he shut his eyes tightly. ‘This is not how you win a girl over’, he screamed at himself resisting the urge from slamming his head into the wall. Instead, he took a deep breath and walked to the kitchen, dropping the glass into the sink and staring at the empty bottle of Vodka sitting in the sink. The view of it caused a sickness to rumble in his stomach, and as soon as he took a deep breath, smelling the liquid, he set off into a sprint to the bathroom.

As Vanessa pulled stood next to the bed looking at her clothes lying on the floor, she heard the loud slam of someone falling against the floor, and then the low hum of someone throwing up. Contorting her face in disgust, she went to grab her dress to slip back on, but as the sound of a light groan filled the air, her hard outer shell cracked and fell to the floor. Picking up the button up shirt she had taken off, she slipped it back on, buttoned it up, leaving the top three open, and then rolled the sleeves up to her elbows.

Sighing heavily Vanessa pushed open the bathroom door and watched as Zach pulled himself to his feet and grabbed a bottle of mouth wash. Swishing it around his mouth, he then spit it out. Five seconds later, he was back hanging his head over the toilet. “Zach”, her voice was soft after the sound of the toilet flushing disappeared into the air. “Did you take any aspirin?” she looked at him, waiting for a reply.

As he shook her head, Vanessa nodded and quickly walked around until she found herself in the kitchen. The first thing she noticed was the bottle on the counter, and as she walked over to it, she noticed the empty bottle of vodka lying in the sink. Clenching her fists, she sighed heavily and grabbed the bottle of aspirin and searched around for a cup. Once she had a cup of water and the bottle of aspirins, she set off back for the bathroom.

“You didn’t leave?” Zach asked as he swallowed the aspirins dry and then quickly drank the bottle of water. As he set it on the floor, his hands pressed against his mouth. Once nothing happened, his eyes opened and connected onto the girl standing before him.

“I felt bad”; Vanessa answered honestly, pressing her fingers to her head, counting every second until the aspirin would finally kick in. “And this shirt is pretty comfortable”, she couldn’t believe what she was saying, and on the other side, Zach couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “I think I’m still a little buzzed”, Vanessa whispered honestly. “I don’t feel myself.”

“I like this better”, Zach blurted out and then wide eyed turned to her, waiting for her to get up and walk out of the bathroom, leaving Zach to fend through his hangover alone. But for the second miracle of the day, Vanessa just stood there, staring at her reflection in the mirror. Her loose brown curls were deflated, her skin had a glow to it, and her eyeliner was smeared. To some she looked like a mess, but to Zach, she looked perfect.

“I don’t blame you”, her voice was captivating. The sickness rumbling in Zach’s stomach was silenced as her voice filled the room. He couldn’t do anything but stare at her, the words were to rare, to perfect to hear at a time like this. “My mind gets too caught up in the need to be good at something, that I stress myself out to the point where I just hate everyone else. I don’t mean too, but after everything, I just want to focus on my job.” With a small sigh, she looked up at Zach.

‘You, I could make time for’, she wanted to say it, let it slip passed her tongue and then if she changed her mind tell him she was still out of it the next day, but no matter how hard she tried, it stayed in her throat, suffocating her.

The next two hours Vanessa spent talking with Zach on his huge bathroom floor. The topics ranged from their favorite colors to trying to piece together what had happened the night before. When words spilled onto this subject, tension rose into the air, and their eyes could only trace along the grid on the floor created by the tiles.

Words left them after Zach pointed out the most obvious event, they had sex. After that, Vanessa couldn’t say much. That was the only thing that she could remember. The way his fingers traced over her skin making her shiver, his soft lips pressing against her skin making her brain malfunction and skin burn, all of it came rushing back into her, and as she brought her eyes from the grid on the floor, she looked at the boy across from her, and let her stomach flop with the overwhelming feeling of butterflies.

‘No, no this isn’t supposed to happen!’ She screamed at herself as her arms pulled her knees into her chest. Forehead pressing against her folded arms, she let out a deep breath and blinked a few times trying to calm down her mind. ‘Get a hold of yourself’, she inhaled slowly, ‘You cannot let these stupid emotions get the best of you. Zach is off limits. Zach is-‘

“Hey, Vanessa”, his soft voice danced around Vanessa’s ears making her head lift from her arms. Peering deep into the brown pools across from her, the butterflies in her stomach started to flap violently against the command of her head. Inhaling slowly to try to calm herself, Zach placed his hand on her face and directed her eyes into his. “Are you alright, you’re really pale, and-“

Shivering from his touch, Vanessa jumped to her feet and quickly glanced at herself in the mirror. She was whiter than the porcelain sink. “I need to get home”, she mumbled and quickly turned to Zach, watching the confusion and devastation wash over his face.

How could she just jump up and leave like this after all they spoke about. It just didn’t make sense to him, and then an idea slowly started to dawn on him. What if after everything that had happened, all of the mood swings that she had went through, this just made her hate him more? She said it herself; she was still a little buzzed, so what if she finally came out of it? What if it was the old Vanessa, the one that hated Zach. The one he will obviously never have a chance with.

Blinking slowly, Zach stood up and watched the girl walk toward the door, her fingers rolled into a fist. “Want me to walk you home?”

“No, it’s fine. Thanks”, she whispered and with the annoying butterflies still beating in her stomach, she walked out into the hallway and quickly into the bedroom. Although the flannel shirt she was wearing was more comfortable, she quickly squeezed herself back into her dress and slipped into her shoes. Laying the shirt she was in on the bed, she grabbed her things and walked back into the hallway.

Heart pounding in her chest, she looked over at Zach, his fingers pressing numbers on his phone. Once he was done, he looked over and gave Vanessa a small smile, and then turned and went back into the bathroom. Right then and there, her heart sunk to the bottom of her stomach. Even though Vanessa wanted to just walk out and shove all of her feelings for Zach in a bottle, there was just too many now. They were overpowering, and as she pulled her body out of the house and into the street, she pressed her tongue to the top of her mouth and stopped the urge to jump out in front of a moving car.

Vanessa fell in love with Zach. She may have had feelings for him before, but now, they were permanent.

The rest of the walk home, she frantically thought of having to deal with seeing him every other day, in and out of Alicia’s house. Before, it wasn’t a problem, but now, it was going to be. Vanessa needed to focus on her job, not the gorgeous twenty plus goal scorer.

When she reached the house, she walked up to the front door and in. On the couch was Travis and her best friend, and as they chuckled, Vanessa took a deep breath and looked them right in the eyes. “I’m going to go upstairs and change. I’m moving out”.

Friends completely shocked, Vanessa walked up to her room, threw her long brown hair into a pony tail, slipped into a pair of jeans and a tee shirt, and grabbed her cell phone. Clicking onto the internet, she quickly typed in ‘realtor’, then the state, and after checking a few boxes of local towns, she was given a number of a agency to call. This is the only way she could move on. Having her own place, she would only see Zach very seldom, and that wide gap would kill of her wild emotions.

Vanessa was a business women, not a hopeless romantic, and she intended to stay that way.

“What the fuckdid you do to her, Zach!” Travis screamed through the phone. The boy on the other end sighed heavily as he sat down on his bed, next to his shirt Vanessa had been wearing and shut his eyes. “She wants to move out, what could you have possibly done to scare her away… Literally!”

“I don’t know!” Zach cried into the phone. “We slept together, we woke up, we were fine, she wanted to leave, I finally came to my senses and realized that I have a snowballs chance in hell with her, and then she left. That’s it!”

“You… You don’t like her anymore?”

This question drove Zach into silence. Did he lose all of his feelings for Vanessa? Had he finally grown so tired of chasing her that his emotions shriveled up and blew away? Just moments ago, he looked into her bright blue eyes and felt his heart thud in his chest. Just last night, her soft kisses on his skin and fingers dragging along his skin drove him completely insane, but could all of that been washed away by the realization that he would never have a chance with her?

“I got to call you back, Trav”, Zach whispered and without listening for a goodbye on the other end, he hung up and threw his phone onto the messy bed behind him. Taking a deep breath, he pressed his fingers into his eyes and let out a loud groan as his lungs deflated.

Slamming his hands down next to him on the bed, he felt the soft fabric of his flannel shirt under his right hand. Closing his fingers around it, he brought it up to his vision and looked at it, imagining Vanessa’s small frame under the large sheets of fabric. Shutting his eyes, he brought the shirt up to his face and inhaled deeply. Her smell swam through his head, silencing any thoughts that were trying to gain dominance in his head.

Small memories from the previous night swam through his silenced mind. The way she smiled when he made a dumb joke, the way she smirked as she downed the alcohol in her glass and the glint in her eyes as she reacted to Zach’s touch. Even the thought of them made Zach’s skin crawl, and as he took one last inhale of her scent, he took the shirt and rolled it up into a ball. Sitting up, he threw it across the room into the laundry basket.

She didn’t want him. Vanessa Cooke would never want him. She hated him so much she was moving away, right?

Zach’s brain started to scream with the overload of thoughts. Headache coming alive in his head, Zach stood up and started to walk to the door, the idea of swallowing a few more aspirins calming the storm in his head.

As he walked past the laundry basket, he glanced down into it and saw the balled up shirt. For a moment, he wanted to reach back into the basket and pull it out, letting her scent flow through his head once more, but instead, he continued walking out of the door.

When he reached the kitchen he grabbed the bottle of aspirins and a glass of water. Taking them, he set the glass into the sink next to the glass Vanessa had drank from. As Zach let his eyes examine it, he felt his stomach flip.

Thoughts rushed into his head. She didn’t like him. Maybe she did like him but she was scared. Maybe that she just wants to be friends, but how could you be just friends after you slept together. Maybe she was just buzzed. Maybe she was being herself.

With a loud scream Zach pressed his hands to his forehead and then ripped them from his skin and slammed them against the counter.

“I do not love Vanessa. I do not love her at all. She doesn’t love me and I love her”, Zach paused for a minute and then sighed heavily. Even in his most angry moments, he just couldn’t say it. Pressing his hands back to his head, he walked back to his bedroom. As he walked past the laundry basket, he pulled the shirt out and brought with him as he crawled back into bed. Throwing it on the pillow that used to hold Vanessa’s head, he curled up in the sheets and stared at it as his skin burnt remembering her touch.

Last night, however much Zach hated to admit it, he fell even more in love with Vanessa.

last night I fell in love without you, I waved goodbye to that heart of mine, beating solo on your lawn