Wild Night

Now I stood at the side of the stage. Watching them perform. Me and Jenn. We are who all the other girls want to be. The ones who want to sleep with them. He ran about stage. Screaming into the mic. Flying about when he didn't sing. Brian shot Jenn a look. She flipped him off and smirked. Her hand reached for a bottle of Crown Royal. That's what he wanted...besides her anyways. She walked out onto the stage. No regards to anyone else. All she saw was Brian. She opened the bottle and poured the liquid in his mouth. He bit at it and shook his head around. She took a drink for herself. I smiled. The crowd loved her. She didn't even have to do anything but they loved her. She went up to the mic and started singing along with them. Casually I walked out. Looking at all the blurry faces. My smoke dangling in my fingers. A bottle of Jack in the other. Brian went to his ego riser and kept on with his playing. Letting me and Jenn be drunks on stage. That's how the show went down.

Brian: I love you two.

Jenn: I'm sure...

She smiled.

Melly: make sure to get to the bus before you start taking clothes off.

Jenn: we like to make a show.

She led him somewhere. I probley wasn't going to see them for the rest of the night.

Melly: hello love.

Matt smiled at me and kissed my lips.

Matt: you taste like a brewery.

Zacky: that sounds delicious.

I smiled a thank you.

Jimmy: geeze Melly you started the party without me.

Melly: sorry sweetheart. I was bored.

He laughed a bit.

Zacky: let's go party Melly.

Melly: fuck yeah!

Jimmy and Zacky picked me up. Placing me on their shoulders. I laughed.

Melly: come on Matthew!

He frowned a bit. I got down and ran to him. Jumping in his arms.

Melly: I'll ride you instead if you like.

He sighed eyes closed. I bit his lip.

Melly: come on husband. Carry me to the party.

He smiled.

Matt: maybe you shouldn't drink to much more tonight.

Melly: ok...

I laughed out.

Melly: and maybe I shouldn't suck your dick either.

Matt: let's not get so irrational.

I smiled and shook my head.

Melly: I'm nothing more than a blow up doll to you love.

My head rested on his shoulder. He sighed.

Matt: that's not true.

Melly: just because you married me doesn't prove that wrong. After all we were wasted beyond reason.

He shook his head.

Matt: I do love you...

I looked at him and laughed shaking my head.

Melly: don't lie to yourself Matthew. You love me on my knees. You love me on my back beneath you.

I stopped laughing but still shook my head.

Melly: no you don't love me, Matt, you love what I do to you.

He set me down. I stayed close to him. The others kept on their merry way.

Matt: you think you know everything about how people feel and see you.

Melly: what do you see then. Look me in the eye and tell me you don't see a party whore.

Matt: I see a lost lonely little girl who doesn't know what to do with her life.

I looked at his face for a moment then shook my head looking away.

Matt: yes. You are a party whore only in your eyes Melly. None of us see that. We see...a girl throwing her life away.

Melly: I'm living life.

He shook his head.

Matt: you can't remember it. You get wasted because you're alone and you're alone because you're wasted. Jenn doesn't even party like you. And you know that.

I smiled.

Melly: no one partys like me love.

It was hard to put a smile on my face.

Matt: you don't have to feel alone Melly.

I bit the inside of my cheek.

Matt: just like you, I know things about you that other people don't. Its what happens when you're gone.

Melly: I'm done with this...

He grabbed my arm before I could walk away.

Matt: I'm not.

Melly: even with all you've said Matt. Me being lonely and not knowing what to do with myself and all that shit, tells me you still only see a drunk.

Matt: you're so much more than a bottle and a smoke. Have you ever taken a good look at yourself? And I'm not talking about the front of a party girl. I'm talking about the girl who loves her family and friends. You're scared to lose us. And you've said that more than once. Sober and not.

I crossed my arms.

Melly: it doesn't make you see me other than a drunk. Lost or not. To you I'll always be some sad little drunk girl.

I shook my head.

Melly: I don't need your pity.

Matt: its not pity...

Melly: then what is it? Are you trying to prove something? What a great person you are. Save the little whore from going to hell and redeem yourself along the way.

I huffed out a laugh.

Matt: its not like that.

Melly: then enlighten me.

Matt: you will lose us. And not because we leave you.

Melly: I don't understand why I'm being singled out. I'm not the only who gets fucked up around here. Jenn, Johnny, Brian, fuck even you do Matt.

Matt: you're the only one that matters to me!

He snapped. I took a step back. He doesn't ever really get worked up.

Matt: I didn't!

He sighed. His hand massaged his forehead.

Matt: I love and care about all my friends Melly...

Melly: me too.

I said quietly. His face softened.

Matt: but you...Melly I do love you, as hard as it is to believe. Because I'm a sick fuck.

Melly: you're not a sick fuck.

Matt: I am to most. You make it ok for me to use you. I can be who I am or am not with you.

Melly: w-what?

He ran his hands over his face.

Matt: its like we said the other night, I don't have to hide with you. You'll love me no matter how fucking annoying or stupid or a big asshole or even perverted I am.

He smiled with a weak sigh.

Matt: I didn't marry you for the fuck of it. I knew what I was doing...live fast die young. Now or never. I fucking love you Melly.

I've never felt more indifferently confused about anything.

Matt: sometimes I feel my words are wasted because you are.

Melly: they aren't today love.

I walked up to him.

Matt: I'm prepared for us.

My eyes scanned his face.

Matt: even if you aren't.

Melly: I'm never prepared for anything but a party Matthew.

Matt: I know.

Melly: this relationship isn't healthy.

Matt: unhealthy things are always what taste best.

I smiled.

Melly: and how do I taste?

Matt: you taste nasty...

He said with a smirk.

Melly: then what does that mean?

Matt: unhealthy things always taste the best.

I narrowed my eyes playfully. His lips met mine briefly.

Matt: you are what I need.

Melly: you sure?

Matt: you've known that.

Melly: I've known I didn't want you out of my life. I didn't care how you were in it.

Matt: even if I was fucking you wasted.

Melly: anything involving me, you, and the word fucking in the same sentence was good enough for me.

His hands squeezed my hips.

Melly: you and me. That's always been more than enough.

He smiled.

Melly: tell me about how you got me to marry you?

Matt: I asked and because you love me you said yes.

Melly: because I need you is more like it. And I was very wasted love.

Matt: that too.

He held me close.

Matt: I love you.

Melly: you keep saying that.

Matt: and I mean it that much more everytime.

Melly: I'm going to disappoint you Matthew.