Blood, Sex, and Cocktails

Eric sat behind me and began massaging my shoulders and lightly kissing my neck. “What has you so stressed, Destiny?”
“I just – I can’t do this, Eric. I can’t do ‘us’ – I just can’t.” I had turned to face him and was making a great effort to remain calm, but it wasn’t working very well.
“Why not,” he asked, making the same effort but succeeding.
“Because - ,” I tried so hard to keep the words from coming out. “Because of what you are.” I sighed. “I can’t be involved with a vampire…I’m sorry.”
“I never would have thought you the sort of person with a problem with vampires.” I could hear that thing again, that…humanity in his voice that I had been hearing more and more often lately. He was actually hurt – disappointed.
“I -” ‘Stay down words, god damn it, stay down!’ “don’t.” I half-groaned and half-sighed. “I don’t have a problem with vampires, Eric. Not at all. But, I have some damn-big Fangbanger issues, and I just don’t think I could live with myself being one.”

“My Destiny, you are not, by any stretch, a Fangbanger,” he assured, reading me like a familiar book. It’s unsettling to have someone actually understand me for once.
“I know,” I sighed, though my view hadn’t changed at all. Arguing would only upset us both and I just wasn’t in the mood tonight. “Thank you,” I said sincerely, planting a light kiss on his chest, where my head was resting.
“Why do you so dislike them,” he asked. The question had been on his mind several times by now. He knew very well now how I felt about that portion of our clientele, but this was the first time he ever asked why.
Against my instinct to shrink away as far as the bed would allow, I snuggled up closer to him and he began running his fingertips up and down my spine. “It was a long time ago,” I began with a sigh. “Long before the Revelation. He was only 12 and I was 9 when he started acting…weird toward me. Nothing big at first, but it just…progressed.”
I didn’t want to tell this story to Eric or anyone else – the only person I’d ever mentioned it to at all was Jazz. But, as had become common, his calming presence had washed over me, not to mention the additional calming gesture of the spine-stroking.
With another sigh, I continued. “It was a lot more saying things than touching but, in a way, that was worse.” By now he knew what I meant without need of a lot of explanation, and he tried to just continue to be calm and comforting. I could feel how tense he was, though, and began rubbing my thumb, resting on his chest, in small circles as an attempt at mimicking his comforting. “I could’ve gotten over that. I’d still be a bit damaged, but I could leave it in the past. But, when I was 13 – my dumb ass friends talked me into going to this party and I didn’t know he was going to be there. His friends helped him, and they watched. It was…pretty bad. Chained to a bed – with real chains - and just - …anyway. ”
“I am so sorry, my dear,” he said, and he meant it though he couldn’t keep the vicious growl out of his voice. “Who?”
“Eric -”
“Destiny, please.” If you asked me a few minutes before, I would have told you that the last person on the face of the Earth to ever say ‘please’ would be Eric Northman.
“My cousin, Pride.” He tensed even more than he already was, which I would’ve thought impossible. “After the Revelation, he hopped right on the Fangbanger wagon – goes for the young teens, always. Not surprised. He and his friends had been obsessed with vampirism since they hit puberty.”
“Scum like that - …he doesn’t deserve another damn breath.”
“Don’t, Eric,” I sighed. “I know what you’re thinking – literally – and it’s sweet that you’re thinking it, but just don’t. He’s not worth the blood stain.” I planted another couple light kisses on his chest.
He sighed, annoyed but defeated. But, as I continued to plant kisses, working my way up to his neck, he chuckled lightly. “And do you know what I’m thinking now?”
“I’ve got a pretty good idea,” I smirked as waves of lust started rolling off of him.
“Know what I just love about sex with you?”
He seemed to fight himself over whether to chuckle or scoff. “The one and only thing?”
I smacked his chest lightly. “You know what I mean, ya jerk.”
He decided on chuckling into my hair. “What is it that you love about sex with me, my dear?”
“Well, I’m especially vulnerable in that situation – same as Sookie and Barry. But, that’s kind of fun with you. Because, for one thing, I catch a lot of interesting thoughts. And, for another, you project all the good feelings very very well. So, double fun.”
“Oh, now that’s hardly fair,” he commented with a chuckle – he was very…chuckle-y tonight. Even as much as we talked, I had seen him smile and he gave little laughs - chuckles - here and there, but this was still out of the ordinary for him. But then he took on an air of pleasant curiosity as he asked, “Do you feel bloodlust? And what we feel when we feed?”
I was surprised it’d never come up before. “Yes. It was…weird, the first time. I’ve gotten used to it. It's played a part in our sex lives more than a couple times - I'm shocked you couldn't tell. Remember how I mentioned that most vampires give off this warmth, rather than a sound, when I try to block them out? That’s mostly the same feeling I get for blood lust and feeding – the only part I really notice most times. But, if the bloodlust is very very strong or I’m in a vulnerable state, I can absorb some pretty…primal feelings, urges.”
“So, you actually feel the hunger?”
“Not so much,” I replied, noticing how off-track we had gotten. “It’s more like…hunter’s instincts, adrenaline, the thrill of the hunt or whatever.”
“Does it bother you, my being so interested in your abilities?” He actually, genuinely was concerned as he stroked my cheek with a thumb as he asked.
“N-no. Not really. I’m just not used to talking about it,” I replied. “It’s actually kind of nice to, I guess.”
“I am glad,” he replied. “I…feel a connection to you, and I like that you are at ease speaking to me about such personal things.” He had shifted toward more proper speech. I knew by then that he did then when he was uncomfortable.
“I feel the same,” I replied simply. There was an awkward kind of silence, and after a moment I meant to break it, but all I got out was, “So.”
He sighed softly with a smile in his breath, “A chuisle…”
“W-what was that?” A smile crept onto my lips.
He chuckled so softly. “Not a thing, dear.”
“Bullshit,” I replied, though just as sweetly. “You just called me your pulse.”
“I…had hoped you’d understand Gaelic.”
“Definitely understand enough… Käresta,” I replied.
“Mmm, accented as a true Swede. Now where ever might you have learned that?”
I smirked. “Well, certainly not from you crying out in sweet Swedish pleasure every time we…” I trailed off as my hand trailed down his chest and stomach to just almost reach his cock.
He let out a very small preemptive ‘mmm.’ I resisted a chuckle.