Trembling With the Strings

I slowly made my way to the hallway, and I stood at the door for around two minutes before slowly easing it open. Sure enough, Darius was lying half-naked on the bed with Kai sitting on his bare stomach. Dray was holding his son’s small hands, playing with him and frowning as he coughed and wheezed. I managed to sneak up on him, because he was so absorbed in his child.

I smiled softly as I lied down beside him, reaching over and taking one of Kai’s hands in my own. Darius jumped in his skin but relaxed when he glanced over. Then he did a double take, and I nearly giggled at the confused look on his face. But a heavy heart does not leave much room for joy and laughter.

“Gracie?” he whispered, keeping his eyes on me as if to see if I was really there.

“You said you’d be waiting, but I suppose I was too late and you found someone else,” I teased, taking Kai onto my stomach and kissing his cold forehead. I frowned momentarily, but I couldn’t keep that scowl when I looked at Darius.

“Demetrius squealed on me,” he told me, smirking and laughing softly. “He told me to hold you for as long as you’d let me, but you didn’t need to know that.”

“I see that now,” I told him. “And Robbie told me what you two talked about.”

“Oh.”

“Do you hate him?”

“Why would I hate him? I’d hate him if he wasn’t in love with you. I can’t blame him for falling for you; I fell even faster. Sure, it bothers me a little, but we’re on good terms. If I fuck up, I don’t stand in the way. If I don’t, he said he’d leave me alone. But I guess that all depends on whether I get another chance or not.” He watched me through nervous eyes, which was certainly different from the way old Darius would handle things. In response to confusion, he used to use brute force.

“I don’t know,” I admitted softly, bouncing Kai up and down as he started crying. “Hush, baby boy,” I begged, chewing on my lip.

“I know that you’re upset about the whole Demetrius thing, but I want you to know something,” he started, keeping his eyes on our son. “After you left, I almost couldn’t bring myself to change him. I…I just froze. I thought that killing his heart would mean killing us. I hope that’s not the case, but I just… At the last second, I acted out of panic. I thought about what it was like to lose my daughter—a child that I didn’t even know—and I just couldn’t imagine losing Demetrius.” He took in a shaky breath, looking anywhere but at me.

“I’m sorry that I lost her,” I murmured, a tear falling down my cheek.

He finally looked at me, and he shook his head, smiling softly. “It’s okay. We have this blessing, even if he’s a little sick. He’s more than enough to keep me busy. I never thought I could love a kid so much, but…it’s weird.”

“It’s called fatherhood,” I told him, smiling painfully.

“Don’t cry,” he begged gently. “Let’s focus on now, okay?” He sat up, and I sat up beside him with Kai in my lap as I totally ignored the TV set.

“Okay. What’s ‘now’?” I asked him, smiling as he took Kai into his arms and walked over to the extra crib he had put in the corner of the room. He turned to look at me, smiling as he strode up to me.

“Right now we’ve got all the time in the world,” he told me, helping me stand up. He pulled me into his arms, and it felt like home again. “I said that I’d be waiting.”

“You did,” I agreed softly, holding him closely and burying my face in his chest. His cold skin seemed to fight the numbness in my heart, even though that may sound sappy (or creepy, maybe).

“And you came to me,” he reminded me, pulling back to look down at me.

“Marty told me to talk to you. He said that you wanted to talk about something.”

He groaned, looking at the ceiling for a minute. “Fine, we can talk first. Marty is going to be in some pain for a few days, probably around three or four. I wanted to know if you’d stay here for those three days, you know to keep an eye on him with me. I don’t trust myself with his life. And I don’t think Marcus and Johnny will object to being able to see their brother again.”

“Okay, I’ll stay. So—”

He cut me off, shaking his head. “I’m not done yet. There’s something else I want to throw out there.”

“What?”

I gasped when he pulled me closer, pressing his lips to the hicky he had given me an hour ago. He smirked against my neck, kissing it softly. I felt a smile creep onto my face as my arms wrapped around his neck.

“During the three days, we’ll be around each other a lot, Grace. If you don’t feel anything for me anymore, then you can easily stay away from me. But if you have any doubts about that, you know where to find me. But,” he paused to kiss me, “You have to come to me this time.”

“Really?” I asked him, a little disappointed after he pulled away. “You sound so sure of yourself.”

“No, I’m not. But I’m not letting you think that I’m forcing anything on you this time. Everything’s up to you from now on, Gracie. If you don’t want something, I’m not going to do it. But if want it, you have to say it to my face, or I’m not doing a thing.” He smirked, pulling his hands from me.

I made a face. “You honestly think that you can outlast me? I know you, Darius.”

“No, you knew the Darius before he lost the love of his life. I’m willing to do anything to make this work. I’m not going to break—you are.”

“You’re too cocky,” I told him, smirking up at him. “You’re going to cave; I’m not going to have to raise a finger.”

“I guess we’ll see about that, won’t we, my love?” he asked, grabbing my hand gently and placing a single kiss on it. “I love you.”

“You’re not going to last three days,” I told him, smiling at him.

He smiled back. “I have a lot of self-control, Gracie. Remember the bedroom? I do believe I was the one that left you out of breath and wanting more,” he breathed seductively, grinning as I grew bright red. “Three days, love.”

He left me just like that, and I found myself thinking only one thing.

Damn.