Trembling With the Strings

I was sitting on the bed with Darius and watching him read over a lyric sheet. I noticed just how much his band must have meant to him. He was mouthing the words silently as he ran over the print with his index finger. He would occasional furrow his brow and mutter something under his breath, but just got right back on it. I tried to peek at the sheet, but he glanced over at me softly, almost as if he was begging me to just sit still. I obeyed him wordlessly and, with a sigh, I fell back carelessly. I was bored out of my mind.

“If you’re bored now, then you just wait until Lyn gets here. He needs to practice his vocals and drumming. He’s not as quick of a learner as me,” Darius told me with a bit of laughter in his voice.

“You don’t need to practice anything?” I asked, trying to get him into a conversation about something that he wouldn’t just shirk off. He shook his head lightly.

“Love, I’ve been practicing music ever since I got here eighteen years ago. I don’t need any more practice. From the drums to the mandolin, I can play it all.”

Darius dropped his music sheet and fell back to lounge beside me, pulling my back to his chest. Even if I couldn’t stand the guy, it was still nice to have someone hold you when you were feeling lonely. Obviously I wasn’t hugged enough as a child!

“I grew up around music, too,” I admitted quietly, turning around in his arms so I could face him. He was glancing down curiously at me. “Well, during the summers anyway.”

“How so?” he asked me, sounding almost genuinely interested.

“My uncle, Isaac Harper, always invited my brothers and me to come visit him in Oregon every summer since I was seven. I took Marty the summer he was born. He was born July 7, 1985. We went to visit Isaac later in July and I took him because I knew my parents weren’t responsible enough to watch over him unsupervised.” I made a face. “But Isaac sold instruments like guitars and drums and even pianos. He had a Fazoili grand piano... It was gorgeous.”

“Why didn’t you play it?”

“I couldn’t play then. I haven’t seen him in four years. He got married and has kids now. I guess he forgot about us. I finally learned how to play when I was thirteen and this nice old lady from the local church promised that if I went to Sunday services with her, then she’d teach me for free. I learned to play, but when Dad found out that I’d been going to church, he beat me black and blue. He said that God had no place for hopeless girls like me.” I bit my lip, trying not to let my emotions get the better of me. “I just wasn’t ever good for anything, I suppose.”

Darius opened his mouth to say something, but there was a knock on the door that interrupted us. Lyndell barged in without any more warning.

“Dray, my man!” Lynn exclaimed, grinning like a madman. His glow slowly faded when he saw Darius and me lying in each others’ arms.

“Oh, hey, Lynn.” Darius pulled me up with him as he got to his feet. “Sorry, we were just talking.” I watched as Dray’s eyes hardened visibly, and he secured me by his side possessively. My heart sank.

“No problem,” Lyndell muttered, looking all around the room rather than at me. That didn’t make me feel so great about myself, but he eventually bent down and picked up the sheet Darius had dropped. “You’re still obsessing over this song?” Lynn presented a sheet with “Is It Progression If A Cannibal Uses A Fork?” in bold print at the top. Darius snatched it with his free hand.

“It’s a good song,” he grumbled. “You still in love with Fall Out Boy?” He uttered the name as though it were a curse.

“Oh, they’re good, so stop it. But no, I went to a concert late last night and I got special privileges. Backstage, buddy. Yeah, I’m pretty good friends with Eron Bucciarelli, who has to be the best drummer alive!” Lynn grinned suddenly. “I’m in love with their songs now.”

“Let me get this straight,” Darius started, “You met the drummer of Hawthorne Heights?” He nodded. “I fucking hate you, Lynn!”

I think he was joking because he suddenly released me to lunge at his friend, pulling him into a man-hug and clapping him on the back a few times. I had to stifle a chuckle at the sight of two men all-out embracing each other. They finally pulled away and all tension was gone as I let myself go into a fit of giggles.

Even as they laughed along with me I couldn’t help but wonder about their friendship. Not too long ago Darius had been at his throat and ready to murder him, and now they were all okay.

I only hoped their pointless, violent clashes were over with.