How Do You Love Me Now?

Sighing, I sat on the bed and rubbed my face. I didn't know what to think, I mean I had just found out that I have a set of twins with Alexia and while she may be the love of my life she wasn't my current girlfriend.

Oh god, I forgot about Leah until now. What would she do when I told her?

I grinned thinking about how she might break up with me and if she doesn't, I had a legit reason to break up with her. My grin got wider as I realized that the twins could be the tie that breaks Alexia and I back together.

"You okay Brian?" Zacky asked me carefully.

I nodded, "I'm better than okay."

Matt looked at me skeptically, "how? You just found out you had twins."

"But that's okay! Don't you see what this means! I can break up with Leah and get back together with Alexia and everything will be perfect!"

"Dude, it won't be okay. Alexia thinks you cheated on her."

My mouth dropped, "what? How?"

Matt shrugged, "she has to be the one to tell her."

"Did you know Matt?"

"I found out two, three days ago when I went to get her."

"Do. . do they look like me?"

"Jersey, the girl, has your eyes. God Syn they both are adorable."

I smiled, "really?"

Matt nodded, "the girls name is Jersey Briar Lynn Sanders. And she's just as cocky as you are. She acts like she's a princess in our presence but she isn't a brat."

"That's because she is a fucking princess, she is my daughter after all."

"And the boy's name is Tyler Matthew James Sanders."

I nodded taking it all in, "you know the day she ran I was going to propose."

"Is that why you can't propose to Leah?"

"I don't want to marry Leah, I can't see anyone else walking down that isle than Alexia."

Matt nodded, "I can't see anyone else being my brother-in-law than you."

"So will you help me get her back?"

"I don't know you did break my baby sisters heart-"

"I swear Matt I never cheated on her."

Matt cracked a smile, "I know I was just messing with you."

I shoved Matt playfully, "shut up."

"So you want to be in the twins life?"

"Ya, they're my flesh and blood Matt."

I shook my head not knowing how Matt could ask me a question like that. They were my children, the people that would carry my name on once Alexia and I got married and lived happily ever after.

Jimmy took a seat next to me on the bed, "they truly are adorable."

"You knew?"

"Please don't be mad at me, but I was there when Alexia found out."

"She asked you not to tell me?"

Jimmy nodded and looked away, "it hurt every year to see them grow up and know you didn't even have a clue about them."

I cracked a smile, "fuck I didn't think you could keep a secret for the life of you."

"Neither did I, there were so many time I almost blurted it out."

"Matt said Jersey has my eyes and my ego."

"Tyler looks just like Matt, it's actually really creepy. But he wants to grow up to be a rockstar, they both do."

"Really?"

"Ya but they wanna to be drummers like their 'unckle Jimmy'."

I laughed, "my kids are learning guitar like their father and grandfather. Holy shit I'm a father."

Jimmy nodded and laughed as well, "wait till Papa Gates finds out."

"Oh god, he's going to spoil them."

"Just him? I think everyone will spoil them."

"Do you think they'll like me? Or will they hate me?"

"Kids love you! What makes you think they'll be different?"

"Those kids aren't my kids."

"I promise you they'll love you and you'll love them."

I smiled, "thanks."

"But I can't promise they'll like Leah."

"That's okay, I'm going to break up with her."

"Really?"

I nodded, "she ready for the next step and I'm not. I want to stay here and get to know my kids."

"I'm glad, I really am."

"She told me to quit the band, or take a break but we all know that means quit."

Jimmy's jaw dropped, "seriously?'

"Ya, I told her that I didn't want kids because the band's doing so well at the moment and she told me to take a break from the band. And I told her no and then she asked if the band was more important than the relationship and I told it was."

"You sure the relationship's not already over?"

"No she told me and I quote: 'I'll give you a couple days to re-think that Brian since we belong together. I wouldn't have stayed with you for the last three years if we weren't. I love you Brian and you love me so you re-think your life before you come back home.'"

"Wow so you thought about it?"

I nodded, "ya."

"And?"

"She's not the one for me."

Jimmy smiled and nodded before leaving me to my thoughts. I looked around, hearing music to see Jimmy had turned on the radio. I smiled listening to the lyrics.

'Hope it’s all the I have
The calm in the storm
Is right where I am
Inside of hope
It’s all that I know
It’s what I’m moved for
It’s what I live for'

I smiled feeling as though that song was a sign telling me not to give up on Alexia.

'I’m ready to live
I’m ready to dream
I’m ready for fear, and love and everything between'

That somehow both of us was ready to deal with this situation and could deal with it in an adult manor.

'Don’t tell me I’m right
Don’t tell me I’m wrong
Just tell me I’m strong enough for one more song
And this could be the one to say it right
Bringing warmth into the night
I’m going to broke, but I’ve got hope

The sound it’s all around
And we can be found
All in good time.
I’m forgiving yesterday
Wishing yesterday would forgive me, but I’ll never see'

And that somehow I could forgive Alexia and she could forgive me and listen to my side of the story.

'So wave goodbye to a time
That you once believed was everything

I’m ready to live
I’m ready to dream
I’m ready for fear, love and everything between

And more importantly, somehow everything would be okay as long as I never gave up hope.

'Don’t tell me I’m right
Don’t tell me I’m wrong
Just tell me I’m strong enough for one more song
And this could be the one to say it right
Bringing warmth into the night
I’m going to broke, but I’ve got hope'

I feel asleep thinking about what it would feel like getting back Alexia and how happy the four of us would live together in Huntington. I would get a bigger house, and everything would be perfect.

'Yeah, I’ve got hope.'

And I wasn't giving mine up.