Hope Starts Broken Hearts

Wandering eyes in the room landed on me, watching suspiciously as I approached the table by the wall in the far end. Green robes were hardly ever caught somewhere other than their own table so I guess the sight was naturally odd to some. When I reached the Gryffindors, it wasn’t until his friends spoke up that Clyde noticed my presence, who’s smile dramatically dropped the moment he looked at me.

“Oh, hello there, Belle!” a cheery voice was the first to greet me once I had walked up.

Another voice brightly spoke, similar in tone to the last one, instantly after the other had ended her sentence. “This is splendid, a Slytherin visiting a table of Gryffindors!”

In front of Clyde, who sat on the other side of the table, were two friendly girls grinning widely at me.

“Hello there, Emmy, Effie,” I greeted the sisters with a smile of my own.

Effie had short, chestnut colored hair that ended just over her shoulders. Emmy’s hair was the same color, but cascaded long passed her chest. They were both pale girls with a petite figure, sharing the exact same green eyes, and the exact same face. Efelyn Everard, however, was a third year Gryffindor while her twin sister Emily was sorted into Ravenclaw. They were two of Clyde's many cousins.

“Why is a Slytherin at a Gryffindor table?” a boy I recognized to be Dean Thomas whispered to Clyde, failing at not allowing me to hear what he was saying. People seriously don’t know how to whisper these days.

“She’s leaving,” Clyde replied harshly, looking up at me. “Isn’t that right, Crowe?”

“Leaving already?” the twins cried at the same time.

“But it’s good to have different houses sit together!” Emmy yelled.

“Oh yes, Hogwarts is far too segregated,” complained the other.

“Shut it, brats,” Clyde scolded the two, causing them to slap their mouths shut and sink a bit into their seats. He looked at me once again with an angry stare. “Now why are you here?”

“You know why I’m here,” I replied, preventing myself from feeling even a little interrogated.

“Actually, I don’t.”

“Will you just talk to me?” I snapped.

As fast as my temper rose, he sat up from his seat and bashed his hands onto the table. “Talk, then!”

Lurking eyes watched us curiously, probably wondering what the dramatic scene was about. I stared intently into Clyde's amber eyes, who did the same for the next few seconds. No one around us said anything as they waited for our argument to proceed.
“Clyde,” I spoke slowly, breaking the unblinking pattern of our gazes. “We’ll talk, but in private. Come with me to the Entrance Hall.”

He didn’t tear his eyes away from me until he muttered a small, “fine.” Then he stood up, and we met when the two of us reached the end of the long table. It was awkwardly silent as we walked across the room—Clyde following a foot or two behind me. I snuck a quick glance at Aspen and Maggie when we passed the Slytherin table, who returned my look with equal confidence. Maggie’s mouth tugged into a slight smile, and Aspen shot me a reassuring nod.

When we finally reached the half-empty Entrance Hall, I stopped in my tracks. “Clyde—“ I started, turning around to face him, but was immediately interrupted.

“You ditched us, Belle!” he instantly began. “You ditched us for Malfoy! What kind of friend are you?!”

“I suppose you were being a much better friend, right, Clyde?” I replied, anger replacing the fading remorse. “You walked off to avoid me without even giving me a chance to apologize!”

Clyde looked taken back at first, his eyes slightly narrowing. He eventually regained his composure and shouted, “don’t turn this around, making it seem like it’s my fault!”

“It’s not your fault,” I responded, my tone a bit calmer than a few seconds ago. “I know it’s my fault. I admit that! And I’m sorry, Clyde,” I said solemnly. “I’m really, truly sorry.”

His tense face softened at that moment, but he didn’t say anything. It was quiet, and I wondered what was going through his mind as he avoided eye contact with me. I slowly crossed my arms in front of my chest, melting into the silence, my eyes looking at anything except his.

“I guess,” Clyde started again, exhaling a huge breath of air. I looked up at him, hope clouding my mind. “I guess nothing’s worth losing your friendship, Belle,” he continued, but a smile had already formed across my face. “Even Malfoy.”

I instantly stepped up to him and gave him a hug. Clyde, after recovering from being surprised at first, eventually returned my embrace even tighter.

“A simple, ‘it’s okay’ would have worked,” I muttered slightly, hesitating from removing my arms from the boy’s body. “Thank, Clyde.” I then pulled away from him; my smile growing even wider. “We’ve been friends since we were in diapers.”

“Yeah,” he laughed, scratching the back of his head, and then grinned. “Before we started attending this school. Before we met anyone else. That’s why your friendship’s the most important.”

“Aw, Clyde!” I slurred his name, throwing my arms around him again in pure bliss.

This time, instead of hugging me back, an uncomfortable expression hit his face as it lit a bright shade of scarlet. “Hey now, don’t go turning all emotional on me!”

“You’re the one being all emotional, silly, sharing all those unnecessary remarks.” I giggled quietly and let the poor boy go free.

Clyde didn’t hesitate before taking a seat on the bottom step of the stairs. I followed him, sitting on the steps a few more up.

“Heidi was extremely jealous, seeing you there with Malfoy,” he murmured out of nowhere, and I instantly felt a painful pang in my chest.

“What are you talking about, Clyde?” I stammered, unconvinced. I suddenly grew a bit nervous, but I wasn't denying it in my head.

“She can’t be jealous. She’s over Malfoy, she loves you!” I exclaimed, but by the look on Clyde's face, I seemed to only be convincing myself.

Clyde was staring in front of him into nothing, his elbows resting on the tip of his knees. “She’s not over Malfoy.” His voice was low, morbid now. I could sense the pain in just his tone.

“That’s insane,” I said. “She’s in love with you, Clyde. You’re her boyfriend.”

“That’s exactly how I know!” He turned around to face me in a split-second, causing me to jump back, completely startled by his movement. “That’s why I despise Malfoy so much. She loves him, Belle, maybe even more than she claims to love me. Earlier today…All she was going on about wasn’t you, but Malfoy. She wasn’t upset with you for ditching us, she was upset with him for taking interest in you.”

I found myself at the verge of tears; my eyes fighting to simply hold them in. “I…” I started, but my sentence dissolved into silence. I was at a loss for words.

“If you don’t want to believe me—“

“I believe you,” I intruded, staring sympathetically at him. “It’s just…It’s ridiculous! They broke up a year ago. She’s been with you—She’s been with you for an entire year.”

His frown rose into a sly, almost masochistic smirk. “Yeah,” he said in a dull, lifeless tone, turning his body around so that he wasn’t facing me anymore. I stared at the back of his head, not knowing exactly what to say or do to ease the pain he was obviously putting up with. “I’m just as confused as you are, Belle, but it’s the truth.”

“Why haven’t you told me before? Why are you still with her, then?” There were a million questions running through my mind, but some were better left unsaid.

“I’ve been denying it the past few months, actually. No one likes to admit that their girlfriend is in love with someone else.”
“I guess that’s true,” I whispered solemnly, figuring he was right. I waited for him to say something else.

“And to answer your second question,” he continued, and I waited patiently, hoping that for once in the start of this new topic he would say something that didn’t bring pain to the both of us. “I love her. That should explain why I haven’t ended it with her.”

This whole time, I always thought that their relationship was so strong. I always imagined it to be full of nothing but love and compassion for each other. Nothing but loyalty, honestly, and trust. Aspen, Maggie and I have always talked about how Heidi still fancied Malfoy, but we believed her love for Clyde was stronger than that.

“But doesn’t it bother you, Clyde?” I let out another of the questions skeptically running through my mind. “When you pass by Malfoy, or when you see her look at him, or—“

“Of course it bloody bothers me!” he suddenly shouted, and I timidly bit my bottom lip. He turned around to face me, and his face softened immensely. “Sorry,” he mumbled sincerely, realizing my lack of comfort at the sudden raise in his voice. “But…The thing that bothers me the most is the fact that, that Malfoy doesn’t even realize she’s there. He’s too bloody stupid to notice her when she’s looking at him, or just too mean to say or do anything. I don’t even think he knows that she’s his ex-girlfriend!”

“He doesn’t,” I replied without thinking, and then instantly slapped my hands onto my mouth when Clyde turned to me with widen eyes.

“What?” he questioned, completely astonished.

My heart rate was now speeding a mile a minute. “I-I mean! I think h-he—“

“Belle!” he burst, impatiently might I add, after I struggled so hard to find the right words.

I sighed, and without the courage to look him in the eyes, I lowered my head and mumbled, “he doesn’t remember. I asked him where Heidi was earlier, and he didn’t know who I was talking about.”

When I brought my head up to apologize, I saw rage burning in his widened eyes, and his face flushed with absolute anger. My heart skipped a beat when Clyde suddenly stood up, enraged in his own wrath, and I suddenly grew extremely frightened as my eyes flood with tears.

“Clyde!” I yelled, grabbing a tight hold of his Gryffindor robe to stop him from stepping into the Great Hall. The look in his eyes after I said what I did…It was pure vex; as if he wouldn’t hesitate from skinning Malfoy alive. I was beyond scared of what he was planning.

“What d’you think you’re doing?!” I gripped tighter as he attempted to slip his robe away from my grasp. “CLYDE!”

That’s when he stopped fighting, and as a tear rolled down my cheek, I let go of his robe.

“Why does she like him, Belle?” his voice was calm now, but I couldn’t see the look on his face as he was facing the other direction, staring at the floor. I watched his left hand tighten into a fist. “Tell me what she bloody sees in that boy?!”

“Clyde, I wouldn’t know,” I sobbed quietly, picking myself up from my seat. “I don’t…I don’t really know him very well,” I managed to whisper.

"You were with him earlier," he said quietly. "He's a foul little prick, isn't he? What could girls possibly see in that?"

I didn't reply. I couldn't reply. If I had, I would have defended Malfoy. He was selfish, rude at times, unbelievably blunt and cocky as hell. But not to me, and not to everyone.

As my head faced the floor, I noticed the swaying of Clyde's robe turning around to face me. I brought my head up, and when my watery eyes traveled up to meet his, I noticed two parallel lines of tears running down both of his cheeks.

"You fancy him, too?" he ask softly. No trace of anger, simply curiosity.

My reply was lost too quick. "Of course not."

I felt an uneasy flutter in my stomach when I said it.

Clyde turned the other way now, away from the Great Hall. The atmosphere around us had calmed to a still silence.

"He's in your house, I suppose I can't force you to stop talking to him," Clyde said suddenly. "But I'm warning you now, Belle, nothing good comes to those who associate themselves with the Slytherin Prince."