People Change

Brian plucked uninterestedly at the strings on his guitar, raising his head as the melody of notes washed swiftly throughout the whole house. He sat upstairs in his house in the guest bedroom that also doubled as his studio: he’d stored most of his guitars and band stuff in that room. Brian focused on his guitar, mindlessly playing a few more notes. He couldn’t focus, however, and stood up holding the guitar by its long neck and sat it at the base of a wall along with his other guitars, most of them acoustic.

He couldn’t stop thinking about Sydney’s speech directed at him. It cleared away most of the tension between them, something Brian had been meaning to do from the beginning; it was impossible before when Sydney didn’t want to do so much as look at him. She’d rarely talked about herself, even; mainly, it’d been centered on Brian becoming as happy as Sydney herself was. She even seemed to understand, without words, what he’d meant when Michelle wouldn’t want to talk to him.

Michelle and Brian never talked again after the fiasco at the mall. Brian knew Michelle would be pretty miffed about him not telling her he already had a girlfriend. He’d never called her for that reason; in turn, Michelle never called him. He didn’t want to push the subject, so he just never called her. It seemed so much easier that way.

And then he’d seen Sydney with Jason. Jason, Jason Berry, had the charms to draw Sydney in. It’d taken Brian several months to first convince Sydney to forgive him, and then also to begin dating her. How long had it taken Jason? A month tops, since their double date with Matt and Lanie. Seeing the two of them together made Brian realize how much he really hadn’t gotten over Sydney as much as he’d said at first. It just perturbed Brian so much that Jason had snagged Sydney right out of the air, while Brian remained undeniably alone and single.

But after Sydney spoke with him, he realized Jason really did deserve a girl like Sydney. Brian could faintly recall scoffing at Jason when he admitted thinking Sydney was cute during high school. That was one of many faults of Brian’s: being a jerk to Sydney in high school. Maybe they would’ve had more of a chance if he hadn’t been. The past is the past, dude, Brian thought to himself. So put it where it belongs: behind you. After speaking with Sydney, he hadn’t been angry about Sydney and Jason being together any longer. Sydney and Jason didn’t stay much longer after Sydney and Brian talked, but Brian made sure to speak with Jason and tell him no hard feelings about Jason dating Sydney. And when Jason looked highly relieved as Brian said that, he knew he’d done the right thing in doing it. His relationship with Sydney drove a dagger between Brian and Jimmy for a short time; he didn’t want the same fate with his relationship with Jason.

Speaking of which, Jason and Sydney made a great couple. Anyone with eyes could see that, and could also see how much they truly loved each other. All through the barbeque, Jason had his arm around Sydney and she always looked so happy when he was near her. Through the many observations Brian took as he sat mostly alone, he noticed the two of them always glancing towards each other even as they stood in separate conversations. It was sort of cute, Brian decided, how even though they stood apart, they longed to be together.

Jason could make Sydney happy in ways Brian could only dream of. Jason and Sydney had such an easy relationship; they could be together so easily, and they could be themselves with each other. The two of them had a connection Brian and Sydney never shared. Sydney and Brian had a great attraction and connection towards each other, but they mistook it for love, when really it’d been simply friendship. Brian agreed with Sydney on that front: they’d made good friends, but then they fucked it up by dating.

Brian found himself stepping out into his backyard, pulling the door shut behind him. Three of his backyards could fit into Jimmy’s backyard, but Brian didn’t mind how small his backyard was. It could support a small round patio table with an umbrella speared down into the center of the table, and a grill, so Brian was content. Besides, his house sat right on the beach; a few feet beyond his back fence, sand took over the soil. He didn’t hold many parties anyway; everyone preferred Jimmy’s house, and Brian couldn’t blame them. Brian preferred Jimmy’s house as a party house, even.

Brian sat down on one of the cushioned chairs grouped around the patio chairs, looking over the low fence at the ocean splashing against the sandy shore. It was only nine o’clock in the morning; within an hour, the whole beach would be covered in families and scantily clad men and women, some who looked like they were in a Speedo ad, some who looked as though they didn’t belong in a swimsuit at all.

Sydney looked great in a swimsuit, Brian remembered; so had Michelle. Which brought his mind around to thinking about his relationship with Michelle. From the top of his head, he couldn’t think of a bad memory he had with Michelle when they’d been dating. They dated for several years after high school; Brian broke up with her shortly after they released City Of Evil. Brian could remember how amused Michelle would get because of how pissed the fan-girls would get when she’d kiss Brian right in front of them. The girl had a death wish where it concerned Brian’s avid fans. One time, she bought a black shirt and wrote on it in silver Sharpie: I SCREWED SYNYSTER GATES LAST NIGHT... On the back, she wrote: AND YOU DIDN’T! That really pissed some fans off, but it amused Brian to no end.

Little things like that always made Brian love Michelle even more. No matter what, even when he couldn’t get a new solo right in the studio and felt like ripping somebody’s head off, mainly Mudrock’s, Michelle could always get him to calm down with just a few soft-spoken words and a brush of her fingertips down his cheek. She could make him laugh almost on demand, and when he woke up hung-over some mornings, she wouldn’t berate him, instead bringing him a Tylenol and a glass of water. That is, if she wasn’t lying hung-over right next to him.

He’d loved Michelle with all his heart, which was why he was so scared he’d be unfaithful to her. He didn’t want to lose her, but for some reason, he decided it would be better if he lost her on his own terms instead of because he got caught cheating on her. He couldn’t stand the thought of seeing her hurt that way; it broke his heart to end their relationship, but the thought they’d at least remain friends afterwards, and when he was good and ready and fully faithful, they could get back together, made him feel a little better. But instead, they drifted further apart and didn’t talk much.

That would be the exact reason he jumped at a chance to meet with her again when they saw each other again, despite the obstacle of Sydney, and a little more indirectly, Jimmy. And look where it got him. But other than that, his relationship with Michelle had been bliss, for both of them.

Brian rose from his seat and walked to the edge of his yard. He climbed over the low fence and headed into the sand, already warm from the mid-morning summer sun. The gritty grains of sand slipped around his bare feet, forming loosely in the shape of his foot as he stepped through it. Soon, he reached the water’s edge and stared out at the sparkling ocean, letting the waves wash over his ankles.

Maybe that was the conclusion he’d been trying to reach for months, years even. His relationship with Sydney had been no doubt pleasant, but it hadn’t been meant to last. It was like a fire made from straw: strong and bright at first, but dying away fairly quickly, leaving a long moment of darkness in its wake. Sydney belonged with Jason; her fire had already been rekindled, only using wood this time.

Brian wasn’t meant to be with Sydney. He was more geared towards being with Michelle. In order to reignite his fire and brighten his life again, he needed to throw wood onto it instead of straw. Michelle would be that wood.

It would be awkward, but Brian needed to do it. He pulled out his cell phone from his back pocket and dialed in a number that, even after all this time, he still remembered as though it were his own middle name. He calmly put the phone to his ear, thinking through what he would say.

After three rings, a familiar female voice answered with a cheerful,”Hello?”

“Hi, Michelle? It’s Brian. I want to talk to you.”