She Really Wants

Sitting at the table of our families restaurant Morning Thunder, I listened to my parents talk to Justin’s as me and him just looked back and forth acting as if we were paying attention to the conversation, but in reality I knew we were both thinking about the tour we leaving for tomorrow, A Rocket To The Moon, The Maine, The Summer Set, and Anarbor, and how we would be sounded by our best friends minus Alex, Jimmy, Justin’s older brother, and Quinn, my older brother, sighing I took a sip of my apple juice as, as my mom cleared her throat getting my attention along with Justin who set his fork down.

“So Kate have you been dating anyone lately?” I looked up at my mom and shook my head no, dating wasn’t really on the table for me at that moment, always on tour, and if I’m not on tour, I’m working with Jimmy creating band t-shirts, and if I’m not doing that I’m down in Arizona with my best friend Darlan. Julia smiled softly at me showing me that she was sorry, and that suddenly made me feel something was about to happen.

“What about you Justin, got your eye on any girl lately.” Justin sighed and smiled and shook his head, this was another thing me and Justin had in common our parents wanting us to settle down, like Jimmy seemed to be doing with his wonderful girlfriend Hailee, but it just wasn’t an option for Justin, he was always on the road, either doing something for Brighten or doing something for A Rocket To The Moon, and he just has yet to find the one.

“No dad, I don’t have time to even look, you know that, and Kate, she doesn’t have time either.” Justin looked over at my parents and shook his head as he took a sip of his water and picked his fork back up as his sign of saying that was enough, drop the subject, but no, may parents and his parents weren’t about to drop it, things were just heating up.

“Katy do you still have that crush on Justin?” Justin’s fork his, plate as he looked over at me, the blush was evident in my cheeks, and my hands quickly flew to my face, Justin was the first boy that ever made the butterflies erupt in my stomach, the first boy to make me cry, the first boy to ever really make me think.

“Mom, please.” I begged as I played with the ring on my left pointer finger, and was sure thee blush was growing stronger as Justin’s stare grew more and more, I never planed on ever telling Justin about the crush, because from dating Dan and Jake, I thought Justin’s little crush had sort of started to fate, sure there were times when he would smile and I’d get that feeling but it would always pass by.

“Justin, Kate we need to talk about something we have been talking about for a while no.” Justin rolled his eyes at his mother and sat back in his chair, I looked over at him and frowned, I knew this was going to be awkward, I may even be out of a job it was so awkward, remind me to thank my parents.

“Enlighten me please.” Justin looked over at out parents who smiled at us, making me worried, that feeling you get when something is about to happen like your about to have a panic attack, yeah that was currently residing in the pit of my stomach, and I was currently hoping my three egg, spinach, tomato, and feta cheese omelet would be keeping down.

“Well Justin, your mom and I have been talking to Kate’s parents, and well they would like Kate to settle down, get married and have a child, and long before we were talking about this, your mother and Rita, have been planning your guys wedding since Kate was five years old, and when your meet Gina, and Kate started to date Dan, we thought, they are going to marry them, then you broke up with Gina, and Dan cheated on Kate, we knew it was going to happen, and Jake was just a bump in the road, and well we decided that Justin, it’s time for you to settle down as well, and it would make us the parents very happy if you and Kate settled down together.” my eyes must have been the size of saucers, and the feeling of crying must have been evident to my parents because my dad reached over to put his hand on mine which I pulled away fast, always in my life I was the one who made decisions for myself, where I was going to go to high school, who I was going to hang with, who my friends were, and what I wanted to do for a living, but never had my parents made the decision of who was going to love me, if you could even call it love, this was wrong.

“Okay.” I looked over at Justin as I let a few tears slip, he so did not just say okay, he doesn’t love me like that, he never will, I’m nothing special, just the friend, he helps make a living, just the girl who will sit and watch movies with him, I wanted real love when it came and if it ever came, he just sold our lives to our parents happiness, something I’ve been trying to achieve for years.

“Great, we’ll talk about some plans when you get home from tour.” my mom was extremely happy while I was trying to fight the sob that was about to admit from my chest, taking out my cell I started to text Darlan, she was the only one who was maybe able to help me fix this in someway, and someway soon.

Darlan, text me soon please, I’m on the verge of breaking! This is an emergency! - Kate

Hitting send I held tightly to my cell as Justin stood up from his chair and pushed his seat in looking at me with no smile nothing, no emotion evident, sighing he put a twenty down on the table and forced his wallet back in to his tight skinny jeans.

“Come on Kate, we have to go finish packing.” just simply nodding and leaning over the table I kissed my parents on the cheek while still managing to keep my tears in my eyes and my shallow breathing hidden from them, and followed Justin as we walked out of the restaurant and over to his old truck he’s had since his junior year of high school, I sat in the passenger seat looking outside of the car, I hadn’t noticed I wasn’t breathing till Justin reached over and put his hand on my shoulder.

“Kate, go ahead and let it out, cry, just do it because our parents around, and I know you want to.” letting it out and gasping for air I let out a shaking sob, and held on tightly to my wallet, as Justin started the truck, I looked down at my cell and remembered that at this moment, Darlan was with Anarbor pack the trailer, I just hoped she would text me or call me soon, because I don’t think I can go threw this alone.