Lullabies

The car engine was started, but Jack wasn't going anywhere. Sitting in the driveway of his house, he tried to work up the courage to pick Alex up. His friend hadn't been feeling well, mentally. He let his head rest on the steering wheel, letting the conversation play in his head a billon times. "Hey Alex, sorry to show up unannounced, but I thought you could ride with me today?" He could just imagine the conversation. He finally built up the courage, and backed out of his driveway.

Upon arriving at Alex's, Jack noticed something abnormal. Alex's car was gone.. He never left early from the house to go to school. Jack shook it off, slightly let down that he didn't get to drive Alex to school. Everything seemed normal, until lunch. They always had lunch together, but he was gone again. Jack ate with Rian and Zack, trying to keep his mind off Alex. He was hoping that he'd be in their fourth hour class, but once again, Alex was no where in sight. Maybe it was all just too much for him, and he'd left for the day, but Jack couldn't help but feel slightly hurt. Alex wasn't coming to him with his problems so he could fix them.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Alex woke up the next afternoon, surprised that he slept so long. He changed his clothes in the back seat, then moved to the front. Leaving the spot that gave him the most comfort was hard, but he needed to get back. He checked his phone on the drive back, seeing the eight missed calls. Four being from Jack, two from his mom, and two from random numbers. Looking at the clock, he realized school was over. It was time to return Jacks phone call.

"Hello?" Alex said softly, into the receiver.

"Alex...," Jack said, thrilled to hear his voice. "you missed school," he told him quietly, worrying where he was all day.

Alex nodded, then remembered he was on the phone. "I know. Look, can I chill at your house for a while?" he asked, not wanting to go home just yet.

Jack knew something was wrong, the second Alex called him. "Yeah, come on over."
When they hung up, Alex felt relieved. He just wanted to see Jack; he wanted to open up to him, tell him how much it was affecting him, and how he needed someone to make it all better. No, not someone, he needed Jack.

The drive gave him time to think about what he'd tell Jack. Although he really wanted to tell Jack he liked him, well loved him, he felt that it was the wrong timing. Upon arriving at Jacks, he parked on the side of the street, and turned off the car. He needed this, the contact with someone that could make his stomach run in circles. Alex got out of the car and closed the door.

"Alex," Jack said when he opened the door. without saying anything, Alex wrapped his arms tightly around Jacks thin waist, wanting to feel his arms around him. He wanted to feel safe, and Jack could do that for him. Once inside the house, Jack took Alex upstairs, and onto the balcony that was connected to his room. The breeze hit his face, and he sat down letting his feet hang off. Jack joined him, and looked out at the now setting sun.

Alex remember the events of the past day, even though he was trying to forget them. "Jack...," he said, trying to say what he needed to, but not making it. Jack wrapped his arms around Alex, hoping he would tell him what was going on. "My dad," he said, as his tears started to pour out, leaving wet spots on Jacks shirt, "he blames - its my fault," finally spitting out what he'd been trying to say. Jacks shirt clenched tightly in his fists.

Jack shook his head, rubbing circles into Alex's back with his fingers. "It's not your fault," he repeated, wanting Alex to stop thinking about it. Alex laid his head down on his shoulder, trying to dry his eyes. "Its just," he began, letting a few tears slip out before he rubbed his stinging eyes, "he's my own father, how could he?" he asked, not understanding how the hell he could blame his own son. Jack looked down at Alex and put his hand on his shoulder. "I know Alex, I know. Look, stay here tonight okay?" he asked him, wanting more time to sort everything out.

Alex looked up to him with red eyes, nodding. "I would like that," he said quietly, then looked out to the sunset. Even after it set, he continued to look out in to the deep blue sky. "You think I'll ever stop missing him?" he asked Jack, turning to look into his deep brown eyes. Jack shook his head, "Nah, but the pain will become less and less over time. The part of you that misses him the most will numb and your left with all the good memories you've had together. Everything is going to work out Alex, I promise," he told him, giving him one last warm embrace before they went back inside.