Lullabies

Alex was left at a loss of words, racking his brain to find the right thing to say to Jack. He loved him to death, and this is what he'd been waiting for. So why did Jack take off like that? Alex sighed and looked down the street watching as Jack drove away. This was going to be a long night, he could tell. Once inside he called Jack, hoping he'd pick up and they could talk. But he didn't answer, and there was nothing Alex could do. He finally left a message on his voice mail, hoping Jack would finally call him back.

"Look," he sighed softly, then continued. "I need you Jack.. more than anything. I can't stand this silence, and I wanted to tell you how much you meant to me but I was so stunned. This whole time I've been thinking about you, and was too afraid to tell you. But you had the balls to confess. Lets meet - I need to see you. I need you Jack Barakat. I love you," he said letting the emotion take him over. He ended the phone call, with hopes that Jack would finally call him back.

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The voice message was seriously, amazing. Jack loved every second of Alex's voice and his emotion showing straight through it. He loved him - thats all that mattered. He drove himself back home, leaving the busy downtown crowds behind. It was always good to lose yourself amongst people when you were sad. The worse part was hearing Alex's voice mail. What did he do? He felt really bad because he hadn't answered the phone calls even when the outcome was good. He missed Alex already, and just wanted to feel his warm embrace.

Alex called once more, and this time Jack picked up. "Hello?" he answered, just wanting to hear Alex's velvet voice.

"Jack. I'm so- I'm sorry okay? I just...," he began, but Jack cut him off.

"I ran away, like I always do. I'm sorry Alex... I want to see you, please?" he asked Alex, hoping for the best possible answer. He arrived at his house, but then saw Mike's car in the driveway. "Alex, come outside?" he asked, hoping Alex would sneak out.

"Be there in a few," Alex answered quietly, opening his front door and hanging up. He jogged to Jack's car and smiled, opening the passenger side door. "Jack," he said softly, closing the door and looking over to his profile.

Jack started the car and drove, not sure where he was going. The silence that set between them wasn't awkward, well not to Jack. The exit for the ocean was coming up, and Alex felt like it was a good time for Jack and himself to share the spot. He pointed at the exit and said, "Will you take it?" he asked, wondering if Jack would or not. Luckily, he did and followed the road. It would take them all the way to the ocean.

Thirty minutes on that road, but it was all worth it. They were finally at the ocean, and Jack parked his car just before the sand. He turned the car off and put the keys in his pocket before he finally talked. "Alex... I'm so sorry," he said, feeling total and complete remorse. "I just, I didn't want to be hurt and I know you wouldn't do that but, you could always reject me in the way I wanted you-" he tried to continue, but Alex cut him off by leaning over and kissing his lips gently. "It's in the past," he told him softly, opening his door and walking around to Jack's. "Walk with me?" Alex asked, taking his shoes off and throwing them into the car besides Jack's.

Alex's hand was anxious, wanting to reach out for Jack's and lace their fingers together. But he held off, waiting for a sign that Jack wanted that. "I use to come here a lot," he said softly, looking out at the calm waves. "Yeah?" Jack asked, wanting Alex to continue. "My brother would take me to those rocks over there and play his guitar. I use to feel so safe, I feel close to him again Jack. Like he's not gone yet," he said softly, pulling Jack to sit down in the sand. He wrapped his arms around his legs, and let his chin rest on his arms. "The night before I missed school I stayed the night here in my car. It made me feel so safe," he said quietly, then let his hand reach out for Jack's, finding his fingers and lacing their hands together.

They laid down beneath the stars, looking into each others eyes. Jack looked at him with compassion, yet Alex's eyes still displayed grief. He kissed Alex's cheek softly, wanting him to feel safe again. "Come on," Jack said softly, pulling on his hand and leading him to the car. "We'll feel safe together," Jack said quietly and opened the back door letting Alex slide in. He closed and locked the door, then looked at Alex. "It feel okay in here?" he asked, knowing it was a bit chilly outside. "Yeah," Alex said softly, and smiled, letting his arms wrap around Jack's thin waist and shivering body. "Stop being cold," he said quietly, taking off his jacket and using it as a blanket for them both.

"Sing me to sleep," Jack said quietly. Alex began under his breath, wanting to say the lyrics. "I'll see you in my dreams. Waiting to say, I miss you I'm so sorry," he stated softly, opening his eyes and looking at Jack. "Goodnight," Jack said faintly, kissing Alex's cheek. Alex nodded, kissed Jack back then wrapped his arms around his waist once more. They fell asleep in the backseat of the car tangled together and it all felt so right.