Well I Know I'm Not Alright

I stared at Maegan as tears began to form. I didn't really know what to do or to say. This was happening a little to quickly. Maegan looked at the magazine that showed a baby smiling at her. The more I thought of this, the more scared I became.

Maegan sighed and looked at me with a tear going down her face. I could tell that she was very upset, and confused. "I'm not ready to be a parent." Maegan said as she rested her head on her hand. I nodded.

"Are you thinking about adoption?" I asked. Maegan looked at me.

"I don't know. I mean, I know for a fact that the kid would end up finding me and Billie, and hate us." She said. I sighed.

"Maegan, do you even know if your pregnant?"

"Not really. I've been sick for the last week, and my period is two weeks late."

"I think you should get a test." I said. Maegan nodded.

I got up and walked over to her and gave Maegan a hug. Maegan hugged me back and started to cry on my shoulder. I let her have her moment. She was very scared. I could tell. I felt bad for her. She never had a father figure. She doesn't know what to expect out of Billie.

Then out of nowhere, I remembered the arguments that Billie and Maegan have been having for the last week. I looked at Maegan as she finished crying. "Maegan, you and Billie have been arguing because of this?" I asked. Maegan nodded.

"So that explains everything." I said.

I waited outside of the bathroom as Maegan was taking the pregnancy test. I sighed. I was hoping that she wasn't pregnant. I don't think could handle a child right now. Maegan has no clue what she wants to do as a career. The fact that Billie got fired from his job doesn't help at all. He also going on tour in less then two weeks! Poor Maegan.

I sighed, and looked at the box. I then began to think about Mike. What would happen if I got pregnant? He probably would take care of me. I think it would get hard on us though. Kids are not easy to raise.

Maegan came out f the bathroom. I got up and stood in front of her. She sighed before handing the thing to me. She shrugged. I rolled my eyes knowing that she wanted me to tell her if she was pregnant or not.

We waited for two minutes as the box read. When the timer went off I looked at the little box on the stick the Maegan peed on. I looked at it for a few seconds trying to think of a way to tell Maegan. I sighed. "Well?!" She asked. I looked up at her.

"Maegan . . . . it's positive." I said.

I sat in the living room with Mike as I heard Billie, and Maegan talking in her room. I muted the show so I could hear. Billie was taking it pretty good. He didn't flip out or anything. Mike was listening too, and also laughing at their situation.

"Mike, it's not that funny. Maegan is shitting herself." I said sternly.

"I know. It's just Billie's luck." Mike said.

"Go figure. You think he's gunna want to keep it?"

"Yeah! He hates when parents put their kids up for adoption."

"Really?"

"Yeah. He believes that if you get pregnant, then it's you job to take care of the situation."

"I agree. I don't want to get pregnant yet."

"Good. I'm not ready to be a dad yet."

Me and Maegan stayed up together after the boys left. I wanted some time alone with Maegan. We made some tea, and started to talk about the child that growing in her tummy. It was weird how this was happening. From what Maegan was telling me, Billie was ready to have a kid. I was happy about that.

We then talked about how her parents would take it, and his parents. Billie already has two nephew's, and three nieces. So we think his mom wouldn't care to much. The more I thought about her situation, the more comfortable I got. Billie Joe is different from other guys. Most of them say that there going to stay. Then two weeks after the baby is born, the dad leaves. When Billie says something, he means it, and he will stick with it till he dies.

Soon after we both went to bed with thoughts going through our heads. I never imagined that our journey of living in California would end up like this.