True Love Never Ends
Chapter 5
Lou's P.O.V
For the past week my brain had just switched onto auto-pilot. My body carried me around, doing everything I had to do, my brain never really taking notice of everything around me. I did my job every day with no enthusiasm. Usually I loved it, this was what I had always wanted to do ever since I was a teenager, but now I couldn't enjoy it. It was really hard, sitting in the small booth at the back of the room controlling the lights and the pyrotechnics making the A7X show amazing. Whenever I looked up, the guys would notice me and wink, that I didn't mind but whenever Jimmy looked in my direction and I was looking, he'd look down. I knew what I had done but I never realised the damage it had caused him.
I had tried talking to him, just friendly conversation but he just wouldn't talk to me. Sometimes he'd just walk off. I suppose I had deserved it after treating him like that but I wasn't in the right state of mind. In the end, I gave up. I didn't interact with the guys anymore. I didn't even talk much to Kays. Most days I spent in my bunk, sleeping the hours away, wishing for a better life.
I sighed quietly and grabbed my MP4 player, I never went anywhere without it. I slumped myself on the sofa and plugged my earphones in. Music filled my ears, but what was playing never registered properly. My eyes focused on the two couples huddled together in front of me.
Czaree and Matt were cuddled up together, discussing what colour would suit the baby's nursery, he smiled down at her. Pulling her in closer, never letting her go. Brian had Kays on his lap, giggling and smiling at each other. Every so often he would plant little kisses on her neck and whisper cute little things in her ear. Everyone knew it, they were completely in love. They would probably spend the rest of their lives together. I wished for that so much, but no one would take me. No one wants me. Apart from Jimmy but I don't think he would want me after last week.
I began to realise that maybe I wasn't meant to be here. No one had noticed that I had just gone downhill, I was withdrawn from the group even though I was supposed to be the bright, bubbly girl that had everyone in stitches. Not even Kay had come and talk to me after last week. Tears began to form as one little thought span round my head making me dizzy.
Maybe I should just go home.
For the past week my brain had just switched onto auto-pilot. My body carried me around, doing everything I had to do, my brain never really taking notice of everything around me. I did my job every day with no enthusiasm. Usually I loved it, this was what I had always wanted to do ever since I was a teenager, but now I couldn't enjoy it. It was really hard, sitting in the small booth at the back of the room controlling the lights and the pyrotechnics making the A7X show amazing. Whenever I looked up, the guys would notice me and wink, that I didn't mind but whenever Jimmy looked in my direction and I was looking, he'd look down. I knew what I had done but I never realised the damage it had caused him.
I had tried talking to him, just friendly conversation but he just wouldn't talk to me. Sometimes he'd just walk off. I suppose I had deserved it after treating him like that but I wasn't in the right state of mind. In the end, I gave up. I didn't interact with the guys anymore. I didn't even talk much to Kays. Most days I spent in my bunk, sleeping the hours away, wishing for a better life.
I sighed quietly and grabbed my MP4 player, I never went anywhere without it. I slumped myself on the sofa and plugged my earphones in. Music filled my ears, but what was playing never registered properly. My eyes focused on the two couples huddled together in front of me.
Czaree and Matt were cuddled up together, discussing what colour would suit the baby's nursery, he smiled down at her. Pulling her in closer, never letting her go. Brian had Kays on his lap, giggling and smiling at each other. Every so often he would plant little kisses on her neck and whisper cute little things in her ear. Everyone knew it, they were completely in love. They would probably spend the rest of their lives together. I wished for that so much, but no one would take me. No one wants me. Apart from Jimmy but I don't think he would want me after last week.
I began to realise that maybe I wasn't meant to be here. No one had noticed that I had just gone downhill, I was withdrawn from the group even though I was supposed to be the bright, bubbly girl that had everyone in stitches. Not even Kay had come and talk to me after last week. Tears began to form as one little thought span round my head making me dizzy.
Maybe I should just go home.
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Comments pweese =]Sorry Lou for making you sound like a depressed bitch =[
Thanks for reading peeps :)