The Finest Thing

“I’ll be back,” he said, stroking the side of my face softly.

“You promise?” I asked. He smiled, before kissing me.

“I promise.”

It hurt to love him. He was the only person I had loved with my entire being. A love so intense it was unexplainable. And he loved me just the same.

But then he had to leave. He told me he’d come back. He promised.

But promises end up getting broken.

I waited a year for him to come back. But he didn’t. And I didn’t hear from him. It was the emptiest I had ever felt.

After that year, I somehow ended up with this guy, Chris. He was great. I thought.

I loved him. But not as much as Brendon, though. But I tried not to think about Brendon. He had hurt me more than he could probably imagine.

I had been with Chris for a year when something changed. Chris had always been kind of a drinker. But he seemed to be drinking more. And he started to question me more. Asking me why I’m so distant all of a sudden. Questions along those lines. But I didn’t think I was distancing myself.

I happened to glance at a calendar one day and noticed with a sharp pang that it had almost been two years since Brendon had left. Chris found me looking at the calendar. I was crying.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“Nothing,” I whispered. He sighed and left the room. He was getting frustrated with me. I could tell. I was distancing myself from him. I didn’t know it until now. I touched the calendar gently. “Why did you leave Brendon?”

I wiped my eyes and turned around. Chris was watching me.

“Who’s Brendon?” he asked.

“No one,” I said.

“Is he someone you’re seeing?” he asked.

“I’m not seeing anyone other than you,” I said.

“I don’t know if I should believe you,” Chris said. “You’ve been acting strange lately.”

“So acting strange means I’m cheating on you?” I said.

“I’m not sure yet,” he said.

“I can’t believe that you’d think that I would cheat on you,” I said. “When would I even get a chance to meet someone? I stay here all day.”

“I don’t know that,” he said. “If you don’t believe me go ask any of the neighbors. They’re all nosy and watch every move that everyone makes. They’d know if I was screwing around.”

“You know, I don’t like your tone,” Chris said. I knew he was getting mad. But it was for stupid reasons.

“Well I don’t like that you’re accusing me of something I didn’t do,” I said. I walked up to him. “I’d like to go to bed. Could you get out of my way?”

“Don’t talk to me like that,” he said. I could smell the alcohol on his breath.

“Chris,” I said calmly. “Trust me when I tell you that I am not cheating on you. Now can I please get through so that I can go to bed?”

He grabbed my chin hard and I flinched. He held my face tightly as he forced me to look at him.

“I’ll believe you,” he said. “But don’t even think of cheating on me. If I find out that you’re cheating on me or that you have cheated on me, I’ll make sure that you regret it. Understand?”

“Yes,” I mumbled, my eyes watering from the pain caused by Chris’s grip on me. He let go of me and I rubbed my chin, sure that I had bruises forming. Chris stepped aside and I slipped by carefully.

When I reached the bedroom, I changed slowly before crawling into bed. I curled up in a little ball under the covers, feeling more alone than ever.

-------------------------------------------------

Someone was knocking on my apartment door. Chris was asleep next to me, snoring softly. I got out of bed quietly, looking at the clock on the nightstand and noticing that it was the middle of the night. I hurried to the door and opened it slowly.

My heart nearly stopped beating. I almost passed out. I couldn’t breathe for a moment.

“Brendon?”

He smiled at me.

“I promised I’d come back,” he said. I smiled and jumped forward to hug him.

But my arms closed around air. There was no one there.

--------------------------------------

I woke up. It had been a dream. I shook slightly, breathing shakily. My face was wet. I had been crying.

I could hear Chris’s snores. He wasn’t sleeping next to me though. He was asleep on the couch. I could hear the TV. A familiar voice.

I got out of bed and went out into the living room.

And there on the TV was Brendon. I knew he had left for his band. I just didn’t bother paying attention to them. It hurt too much.

But there Brendon was. He was doing an interview, and it was ending. I kneeled down in front of the TV touching Brendon’s face on the screen. Oh God, how I missed him. My heart ached to have him here next to me. That I was hearing his snores instead of Chris’s.

”Is there anything you’d like to say before we finish?” the interviewer asked.

”Umm, yeah, actually,” Brendon said. He looked at the camera and I felt like he was staring at me. ”Ash, if you’re watching, I want you to know that I still love you. Please be patient. I know it’s been a while, but I’m still going to follow through. I am coming back.”

I was crying again. He still remembered the promise he had made me. He hadn’t forgotten about me. I held onto the TV as I cried. I didn’t care how much noise I was making. Let Chris wake up. He no longer mattered. All that did matter was that Brendon was going to come back to me. He was coming back.