Summer: Undefined

No one seemed to notice when I casually rejoined the party taking place in the backyard. And luckily for me I didn’t have to wait too long to get comfortable again with my friends.

I had to laugh at myself here. I was calling people I’d only known for a couple of hours friends. But it seemed like so much longer. It seemed like days, weeks, months. I guess friendship is universal that way. In a quality not quantity sort of manner.

“I hope you know what your brother is doing,” I said as I walked past Gerard and sat down in a chair by the pool. He turned from his conversation with Ray and faced me.

“No… what’s he doing?”

Halle came skipping up behind him and whispered it in his ear. Gerard immediately flushed. I couldn’t blame him, if I found out Jude was making out with Jules I’d probably do the same thing.

“You’re… kidding, right?”

I half smiled and tried to be comforting as best I could. Halle, on the other hand, was all facts.

“Do you see either of them around here? No? I thought so. And… you have two eye witnesses.” She pointed at the two of us. “You can’t get more clear than that.”

Gerard heaved a heavy sigh and slumped his shoulders. I could semi-relate to what was running through his head, though I couldn’t be sure. I’d had the same type of feeling when I found out about Jude and Elle. Sure, they weren’t making out, but they liked each other, so they might. Someday. When they decide to just get honest with each other. But that could take years.

Before I could have another peaceful moment Gerard grasped my hand and thrust me on my feet. He guided me to the gazebo, which had been vacant for the past twenty minutes.

“What are you doing?” I asked when he angrily placed his arms wide apart on the railing. “Gerard?” Slowly, I placed a hand on his tensed shoulder. Almost immediately his muscles relaxed and he turned my way.

“It doesn’t make any sense…” His voice trailed off. From the tone it sounded like he was talking to himself, and I was just dragged away to listen. “I thought Mikey was a smart kid…”

“What do you mean?”

“Wouldn’t he know that he’d never see her again? That tomorrow she’ll have another person wrapped around her finger, and she’ll forget all about him. If he’s smart, he should see that! So why can’t he see that?”

Gerard wrapped his fingers around bits of his hair and hung his head so low that his chin was buried in his chest. No sturdy evidence could support the fact that he was crying, though I thought I saw a tiny glimmer of a tear sparkle in the dim light. Yet, when his head arose, no such tear was accounted for.

“I guess you have to see it through Mikey’s eyes,” I suggested, not knowing if it was the right thing to say in the situation.

“You mean I have to put on those glasses?” He made a face that included sticking out his tongue and I laughed.

“No, I mean try to see it like he would. If you were Mikey what would you think?”

“I’d think she’s a whore who won’t remember my name in the morning,” he said without the slightest bit of hesitation.

“Are you sure that’s not just the brother coming out in you?” I asked with a tiny edge in my voice.

“Maybe… But still! I thought he was-”

“Smart, I know! But, Gerard, people do crazy things when they’re in love.”

Gerard scoffed loudly and crossed his arms. He shuffled his feat and shifted his weight to one side.

“You’ve got a pretty loose definition of love!”

“Attraction! Whatever it is! People do crazy things, no matter what you call it. And admit it, I have a point.”

He sighed dramatically and lightly shoved my shoulder. “Just a little one.”

I walked back to the bench and sat down. Gerard seemed hesitant at first, as if he was making up his mind about what he wanted to do. But eventually he joined me on the bench.

Something I loved about the way Gerard was is that you can sit with him in total silence for the longest time, and it never gets awkward. It was almost as if we were in each other’s mind, we didn’t need to talk to know what the other was thinking. That was something that I’d never experienced before, and was a bit more excited than I should have been. I was so excited by that strange relationship quirk that I started bouncing both my knees on my toes.

Gerard’s eyes fell upon me; one was bigger than the other out of curiosity. That just made me bounce even more, which made his eyes even out and a smile creep over his mouth.

“What are you doing?!” he laughed.

“I. Have no. Idea. But! It’s fun!”

“And so. Is speaking. In sentence. Fragments?”

I nodded enthusiastically and jumped up and began to flail my arms around and sing the words to a song I was making up on the spot.

“Now what are you doing?!” He backed up against the bench, as if he was trying to get as far away from me as possible.

“I’m! Singing! And dancing!”

“Why?”

“Because I want to!”

I had absolutely no idea why in God’s name I was dancing and singing. It couldn’t just be because of the strange, yet fascinating, relationship I had with Gerard. There had to be something more. But at the moment it was remaining a secret, so I merely decided so surrender to the intense urge.

“Could you at least dance to the music? You’re completely off!”

“What music?”

He raised his hand to say something then stopped, and then he raised it again.

“I’ll be right back. Stay here. And… don’t waste all your energy.”

I ceased dancing and stood in the middle of the gazebo waiting for his return.

The chattering of the party was droned out a little bit by the music that came on moments after Gerard had left. And only moments after it started he returned to the gazebo with a smile on his face.

“There. Now you can dance!” Gerard laughed and sat down to watch my performance.
I’d taken two years of ballet back in junior high, so it’d been years since I had actually danced like that.

Luckily for me I knew that song and had a good idea of what to do when I danced and I sang a little bit too.

Since it had been so long I’d forgotten the true joy I’d gotten from dancing. I felt so free in the moves, the way each movement flowed into the next. And I got so incredibly lost in the adrenaline rush that I’d completely forgotten Gerard’s presence.

When the song had ended I collapsed on the gazebo floor with a giant “thump” and put my hands behind my head.

Gerard politely clapped and joined me on the floor.

“Do you take dance class?” he asked curiously.

“I did, but it was so long ago.”

“You’re really good! I’d never thought you could dance like that to this kind of music. But you pulled it off. Really well, I might add.”

“You can dance to just about anything. And thanks.”

We talked through a good portion of the CD about each other’s past. It never really dawned on either of us that we spent so much time talking about where the other was going we never focused on where we’d been.

A silence crept up on us and a ballad crept up along side it.

“I love this song…” I muttered to myself.

“Me too…”

The singing began and I looked up at Gerard who was now standing above me with his hand extended my way. He had a smile on his face and a slight twinkle in his eye as he asked me if I wanted to dance.

“Sure,” I jumped to me feet and went to take his hands. Before I could he backed away from me a bit and politely bowed. “Such a gentleman!”

“I try,” he blushed.

We got into dancing position and began to slowly rock to the sound of the music.

I honestly can’t say much about it. My mind was too focused on not getting too close him, or not breathing too hard, or trying to slow down my heart beat so he couldn’t hear it anymore. It was great, don’t get me wrong, but I wish I wasn’t so nervous. I was so concentrated on the little things that I couldn’t just enjoy the peaceful atmosphere.

The song ended too soon and Gerard unwrapped his arm from around my waist and dropped his hand to his side. A nervous giggle followed and there wasn’t much time for anything else before I heard heavy footsteps coming our way.

My subconscious was telling me not to turn around, to stay in those moments with Gerard. But my instincts had to get the better of me.

As I whipped around I regretted it instantly upon seeing that face which I’ve been trying to avoid thinking about. Only this time this face was bruised, from what I could assume to be my own actions and lack of self-control.

“Delilah! What are you doing?”

“Dancing,” I responded simply, turned back around and very matter-of-factly sat down on the bench.

“With him?” He pointed at Gerard. “Why?”

“Why not with me?” Gerard asserted himself between Vince and myself.

“Because she’s my girlfriend!”

“Vince, are you delusional? Are you on drugs?” I asked, sarcasm dripping from the sides of my mouth.

“It wouldn’t surprised me,” Gerard whispered to me.

“What was that, ass wipe?” Vince shoved Gerard towards the bench.

I shot up and came between the two. We already had enough fights for one night. There wasn’t room for another one.

“Cut it out, you two!”

They stared each other down for a moment before Gerard decided to be the bigger man and just walk away.

I stood for a moment watching him leave when Vince cried out that he was a sissy for leaving and that he should come back and fight. Then when he turned to me I turned immediately away.

“Aw, sugar,” he said in a singsong tone. “Don’t be like that. You know he’s not worth you. You’re way to good for him.”

I scoffed a little louder than I should have and faced Vince again.

“You’re not serious, are you? Did I not just beat you up about forty minutes ago? Or no wait, maybe I was on LSD!”

I pushed past him but didn’t get very far before he grabbed my arm and swooped me into a kiss.

It was anything but pleasurable. I felt like I was kissing sand paper, and the added taste of alcohol didn’t help much. I tried to wiggle away from him but he was too strong for me.
He kept me in his embrace much longer than he should have.

I needed to be rescued.

I felt like I was a damsel in distress. I was being attacked by the evil prince, so where was my hero when I needed him? Right about now there should be a handsome man riding a beautiful stallion riding to my rescue. Well, that in a nutshell.

Yet, instead of my prince, it was my brother. Either he saw us and knew I needed to escape, or he was just walking by.

“Delilah…? Vince!”

It couldn’t have come sooner that I got released. I was so happy I ran straight away from that gazebo and found refuge in Halle, Aimee, Frank, and Ray who were talking joyfully around a bond fire that had been made a few minutes ago.

“Are you okay, Delilah?” Frank asked. “You look… frazzled.”

“Fine. I’m fine. Peachy even.”

Everyone stared at me for a second before continuing their conversation about the kind of cologne Frank had tried on the other day at Wal-Mart. Now why he was trying on cologne at Wal-Mart I had no idea, I was too busy enclosed in my own thoughts to really pay attention to anything.

I can’t really say I was the observer again, but I know it was something along those lines.

The flames of the fire were making picture against the night sky and I mused my mind with trying to find them for a while. That is until a giant gust of wind came and blew some debris in my eye and sparks on my pants.

I jumped up from the heat and danced around trying to get my legs to cool down. Before I embarrassed myself too much I sat down and laughed at myself ahead of everyone else.

“Okay everyone!” I heard Jude say from the patio door. “It’s time to go inside! It’s eleven! Time to head to the basement!”