No One Ever Realized That They're Already Dead

[[April 12, 2008]] \Saturday\

♠ Ivory’s POV ♠

“Hey guys!” I call out over my shoulder. “Check this out!”

I hear the motion of skateboard wheels on pavement coming my way.

“What?” I hear AJ asks.

I smile at them, “check this out.”

They look at the green skateboard contest flyer I’m pointing at.

“No way!” my siblings and friend exclaim.

“Can we enter?” Ellamae asks.

“Oh yeah,” I grin.

“It’s in two weeks,” Damien adds. “Lots of time to practice.”

“Well let’s get started!” AJ claims and rides off over to the half pipe.

I grin at my sibs and ride off too. All of us go in different directions, all working on our weakest links. I gotta win. I have to win.

\ ♠ ♠ [[Fast Forward]] ♠ ♠ \

“I’ll see you tonight Ellamae!” I call over my shoulder.

“Kay!” she calls back while still on her board, riding it next door to her place.

I close the door, a little roughly but whatever.

“Ivory?” I hear Val from the kitchen.

I stifle a groan and using my board, ride on the tiled floor to the kitchen. She was at the stove, making dinner I guess. I stop and lean down, grabbing my board and propping it up against the wall.

“Hey Val,” I mumble while moving to the fridge and grabbing a water bottle out.

“How was skating?”

“Good,” I nod, taking a seat at the kitchen table, drinking more water. “What’s for dinner?”

“Pasta,” she says grinning at me from over her shoulder.

“Cool,” I smirk. “Well,” I get up. “I’ll be upstairs.”

“Kay, I’ll call when it’s done.”

I nod and grab my board on the way out of the kitchen. Moving up the stairs and ending up in my room. I hang my board on a wall rack, next to my other boards. With a sigh, I flog back onto my bed.

No I haven’t changed. My mom had problems, no doubt, but she taught my siblings and I to respect people. Val and I had a break through a couple days ago. I wanted to hang out and surf with Ryan and them but Matt had said no. Val was on my side, she won me over a little bit. And though she’ll never be my mother ever, she could be an ally, a friend.

Matt however… screw him. Still hate him and that’s never going to change. I smirk thinking of the contest in 2 weeks. I have to win. Though Matt’s seen my dozens of awards and whatnot, he’s never seen me in action. He’s seen me surf twice now but those were when the waves were ok and I wasn’t fighting for the Gold. This skate contest… I’ll show him.

I’ll show him what he gave you all those years ago.

[[April 18, 2008]] \Friday\

♠ Matt’s POV ♠

I was sitting in the kitchen waiting for my daughter to get back from school. She still hates me. I’m still trying. It’s been 20 days since I got custody but I feel like I’m doing everything wrong, that I’m just not cutting it. Everything I know about my daughter, I know because other people, Ryan mostly. Every time I think of her smile I get a little pain in my heart. My surf friends say Ivory finally started smiling, not smirking or frowning, and when she smiles, it’s my smile. Dimples and all. What I want more than anything… anything is for my daughter to love me, to smile at me.

I feel a hand being laid on my shoulder and bring my face up from my hands. It’s Val. I move back a little and she moves to sit on my lap. I wrap my arms around her, and she does the same. She just holds me, comforts me, and I selfishly take all I can.

“I can’t do it Val,” I tell her softly, my eyes stinging with tears. “She’s hates me and no one knows why. I’m trying, I am.”

“I know baby,” she whispers, stroking my back. “I know. She’ll come around.”

“But when?” I ask helplessly.

At that moment we hear the front door open and quickly close. Ivory rushes past the kitchen and up the stairs. I already know she’s hurrying to get her board. That’s all she’s been doing these last couple days, skating. Have no clue why, when I know for a fact she places surfing above skating. Sure she still surfs, but she just seems to be skating more often lately. I hear Ivory running back down the stairs and rush past the kitchen.

“Bye! Be back later! Have cell phone!” she manages to get out right before I hear the door slam.

I sigh loudly again, dropping my head, making my face hide in Val’s breast. A couple seconds past before a get that feeling. Yeah… I start kissing Val’s breast, nibbling them a little. She giggles and I make a growling noise in the back of my throat and stand up with her in my arms, bridle style. I continue to kiss her as I move us up the stairs and into our room.

Damn did I need this.

Val’s love.

Love.

\ ♠ ♠ [[Fast Forward]] ♠ ♠ \

♠ Ellamae’s POV ♠

I pause with small gulps of air. My older sibs and AJ, and I have been skating for the last 2 hours. Usually that’s nothing, I learned to keep up with my siblings fast pace, but at the moment I wasn’t feeling too great. I move my head, glancing all around me, looking for the others. I spot Damien and ride over to him.

“Where’s AJ and Ivory?” I ask once reaching him.

“AJ’s in the bowl. Don’t know where Ivory is.”

“Guys!” we hear. Looking over we see AJ running over, board tucked to his side. “It’s Ivory! Hurry!”

\ ♠ ♠ [[Fast Forward]] ♠ ♠ \

♠ Matt’s POV ♠

I was standing in the kitchen, chopping up some tomatoes, in a pair of sweats and nothing else. I grin when I feel arm snake around my waist and I pair of lips kiss my left shoulder blade. I turn my head a little and share a kiss with my love. I don’t know what I’d do without Val here for me. Unfortunately, the door bells rings.

“I got it,” Val smiles and moves away from, out of the kitchen. Moments later I hear, “Matt!”

The emotion I hear in her voice scares me, dropping the knife on the counter, I rush out of the kitchen and to the front door. Val was kneeling in front of a bleeding Ivory, and two police officers stood behind her. I rush and kneel beside Ivory also.

“What the hell happened?” I ask, my voice and face filled with worry.

When I go to thumb the bruising at her temple, she shrugs off Val’s hand on her arm and steps away from me, giving me a glare. I sigh and stand up, looking at the cops.

“I’m Matt Sanders, Ivory’s father. What happened?”

“Can we come in?”

I nod and step aside, Val stands up and moves aside also. Ivory sighs, slumping her shoulders. Val and I led them into the living room and we all take seats, Ivory deciding to sit in the love seat with one of the officers. Bold of her, most kids her age and a lot older would chose to sit as far as possible.

“Mr. Sanders,” the heavier off the cops start, “Your daughter was evolved in a fight at a local skate park a little bit ago.”

“A fight?” I ask unsure, glancing at my daughter who just looked bored.

“Yes,” the other one continues, “She and four other boys exchanged some words just before. One of the boys instigated it when he pushed Ivory but… she used her board and slammed it into the side of his head.”

“What?” I ask glaring at my daughter.

“All the boys parents aren’t going to press chargers since they believe their boys, being older and boys, should haven’t had instigated it in the first place.”

“How much older were they?” Val asks beside me, slipping her hand into mine.

“Three were 13, one was 12.”

“What?” I ask angrily. “Where the hell are they? I’m pressing charges.”

“Mr. Sanders,” the skinner one starts.

“-No,” Ivory cuts in, narrowing her eyes at me. “We’re not pressing charges. We shared some words and it got out of hand. It happens.”

“It doesn’t just happen!” I exclaim angrily shooting to my feet. “Look at you,” I wave my hand her. “You’re bloody and bruised.”

She rolled her eyes, “It’s only a couple bruises and one bloody lip. No big Matt.”

“Just… just,” I take a deep breath. “Just go to your room.”

She sighs and stands up. “Bye Joe,” she says to the heavier cop and then says bye to the skinner one, “Later Paul.”

“Behave Ivory,” they say in unison.

Ivory just chuckles a little as she makes her way out of the room.

[[April 23, 2008]] \Wednesday\

I sigh into my coffee as the front door closes. Ivory was off to school again. Finally… some peace and quiet. That is until 15 minutes later when I hear my front door open and close. Val’s at work; I figured, it must be one or more of the guys. I’m proved correct when Jimmy and Johnny walk into my kitchen, helping themselves to a mug of coffee.

“Hey Shads,” Johnny greets.

“Mornin’,” Jimmy nods

“Hey,” I answers back with a downward nod. “How are the kids?”

“Great,” Johnny answers first, taking a seat in one of the chairs. “Damien got his report back yesterday, got an A. How’d Ivory do?”

“Report?” I ask back unsure but then play it off, “oh yeah yeah. She did good.”

Jimmy and Johnny share looks, both knowing that I had no clue Ivory turned in any kind of report.

Jimmy decides to get rid of the awkwardness, “So, did you find out why the fight even started?”

My face hardens, “No, Ivory won’t tell me a thing. And the only thing she told Val was the kids said something that got her mad.” I sigh heavily, “I don’t know what to do. I’m hanging on a thread, I just can’t fucking take it anymore.”

They don’t say anything for a moment till Johnny says, “Why don’t I take Ivory tonight? You and Val go out, have fun, whatever. In fact… Jimmy have Ellamae over too. It’ll be good for the kids.”

I smile gratefully at my friend, “Thanks Johnny.”

“Thanks man,” Jimmy also smiles. “I’ll play you back and take Damien whenever you want.”

Johnny shrugs. “It’s cool.”

A couple moments pass till I ask Jimmy, “Hey, so how’s Ellamae?”

“She’s good.” He nods taking a sip of his coffee. “Has her little friend Tiffany over when ever she can. It’s good to have a girl her age around. Though Ivory’s only a year older and Damien two years.” He shrugs, “I’m just glad she’s making more friends outside of her siblings. She excited about this Saturday though.”

“Damien too,” Johnny smiles, “It’s all he can talk about lately. “

I look at them confused, “What? What’s happening this Saturday?”

The two share another look and Jimmy hesitantly says, “You don’t know.” It’s not a question.

“Know what?” I ask frustrated that Ivory’s been hiding more then I think.

“The kids…” Johnny says slowly, “They um, signed up for a uh big skateboarding contest. This Saturday.”

I don’t say anything. But I feel the pain in my chest tighten. Why? Does she hate me so much she wouldn’t tell me about something like this? It would be the first competition I’d see her in. She’s been in so many, I’ve missed them all.

“Matt…” Jimmy says lowly.

All I do is get up, walk out of the kitchen, and up to my room. I can’t cry in front of them.

[[April 26, 2008]] \Saturday\

♠ Ivory’s POV ♠

“Whoa,” Ellamae said beside me.

“Yeah,” I said with a small laugh in my voice.

We were on top of one of the three half pipes, watching the stands and surrounding area fill with people.

“I don’t see dad,” Ellamae said looking around wildly for her father.

“There,” I said pointing.

Ellamae looked and smiled, then waved highly above her head. Jimmy, Leana, Johnny, and Lacey all waved back. I felt a momentary pain in the pit the of my stomach. My fath- Matt wasn’t here. I just shrugged it off and dropped down into the pipe, having 15 minutes till the comp begun. Matt had never been to any other contest, I reassured myself, it doesn’t matter if he ever came to one. Its not like he knew about it anyway, from me changing my mind about telling him about the contest and then rubbing it in when I win. Nope, I don't want to have to see him smile that crappy fake smile and clapping when I dominate today. Matt doesn't need fans to think he goods father by showing up. He's crap and I don't need him.

\ ♠ ♠ [[Fast Forward]] ♠ ♠ \

“And lets hear it for Ivory Gold!” one of the announcers announced, the crowd cheered as I did a wave to them. “We’ll see how she places after all other runs.”

I grinned largely, and waved once more. By their own force, my eyes go to my siblings fathers and freeze.

What…the…hell….

Matt? He and Val were now in the group, grinning largely. They… came. Something funny flutters in my chest as the grin drops from my face. I quickly turn and make my way down from the pipe, pushing the unwanted feeling of warmth from me.

So what? They came, big deal.

I was walking back to a large tent that the competitors could sit and refuel. But I bumped into someone and stumbled a little.

“Sorry,” I say before looking up but when I do I glare.

“Hey look guys,” the punk says chuckling with his three friends. “It’s the bastard.”

“Looking for a fight?” I glare.

His eyes narrow down at me and he opens his mouth. But another voice cuts through our convo.

“Is there a problem here?”

We all look to see Officer Paul.

“No sir,” the punk said putting on an innocent smile.

“Good,” Paul says in a firm voice. “You all better not start fighting again.”

“No sir,” another boy answers. “Just sharing a few polite words with our fellow competitor.”

“Hmmm…” the cop hums looking at them before his gaze falls on me, “Ivory, go the tent and get ready for your next run.”

I nod at him, giving one last glare at my rivals, before I start heading back to the tent. I walk around the many competitors, looking for my sibs. Ellamae had already had her meet, ages 6-9 street. Even though I’m 9, I didn’t enter that one. I entered three: ages 9-12 vert, ages 9-12 street, and all ages street. Damien entered the first two and ages 10-15 vert. The ones none of us did or could enter were: ages 13-18 street or vert and all ages vert. Of course with this many competitions you think it would take days with how many people could enter. But all competitors had to try out before hand last Saturday to enter the competition; no one wants to waste time watching some poser try to skate and win.

“Ivory!” I hear called behind me.

Turning I look with a smile and head over to my siblings and AJ.