Back In Your Head

I didn’t want to let go of him.

We were standing outside of my mom’s house out in the Arizona heat. The sun wasn’t giving off the usual burning feeling, but that rather unlikely to happen perfect warm one. What I could smell was the mixture of his familiar cologne and the outdoors. It was quite nice. I had my arms wrapped around his middle and he had his arms draped above my shoulders. We made sure there was no hint of space between the two of us. Occasionally, he would squeeze us together or sway us from side to side. My cheek rested against the soft material of his plain white v-neck and a patch of his skin from what the v-neck wasn’t able to cover. I could hear and as well feel the beat of his heart, while he rested his head above mine.

I pulled away from our embrace shortly to pick up my head from where it had been lying on for several long minutes, his chest, to plant a sweet kiss on his lips, which he would return, and he did. Breaking the kiss, I spoke up, but only to tell him what I have been telling him repeatedly for the past hour.

“I don’t want to go.”

Taking a few steps back, creating a good amount of distance between the two of us, and laced a hand with one of mine he said the same thing he had been telling me for the past hour.

“You have to Amy.”

“No, not really. My mom is just making me.” I argued.

“He’s your dad.”

“Biologically, yes.”

I didn’t care for my father. He was never around when I was growing up. I didn’t know what he did for a living. He didn’t know a single thing about me. He didn’t take me out anywhere. I wasn’t moved when he and my mom split. I was just now curious to why he invited me over at his house, where I grew up until my parents split, for two weeks. Two weeks. Fourteen days of pure misery.

“Come on Amy. He hasn’t seen his daughter in almost two years. He still cares for you. I mean why else would he invite you to stay over?”

I just sighed at his answer. He grinned lightly knowing that I had no remark this time. I mean what else could I say? I suppose he had a point there, but like I said before why would my dad invite me to stay over in the first place? I had no intention of getting closer to him. Maybe my dad wanted to make an effort and try to get close with his only child.

“Whatever. Are you sure you can’t come along today?” I asked ignoring the last topic.

“No, I wish. It’s just two days away though. That’s not far from today.”

“Well it sure feels like it’s going to be.”

He lifted his hand up and placed it upon my cheek, allowing me to look up at his gorgeous face.

“Just try to have fun for me. Go out shopping or hey even go out for a swim by that lake you talked about when you lived there when you were a kid. Have a Kennedy free weekend.” He finished, smiling, then leaned down to kiss me. I removed his hand from my cheek to point out something.

“You forgot that I can’t swim.”

“Oh, yeah.” He replied and laughed at his mistake.

Kennedy’s laughter was the cutest thing in the world to me. He brightened up and made my day. No matter what he did or I did to have almost jeopardized our relationship, I still loved him. When I moved to this part of Arizona, away from my old childhood home, my dad’s place, to start over Kennedy happened to be the one person that had stuck with me since then. He taught me many things while I was out here restarting my life.

Kennedy was in a band too. He was real talented and no one appreciated music the way he does. I never let anyone in except for him and I believe no one knows me better than he does. I’m perfectly happy with my life here and going back home after all those years, where I had no life, where I had to make up my own friends, and played ‘house’ by myself or with whatever pet I had back then would just sadden me. Especially two days without Kennedy being there. You could say I needed him because I really do.

I might have had at least that one good friend when I was growing up there, but you know how it was back then as a child. You played with any kid on the playground. I believe I remember that I thought I could swim so I jumped into the lake out of boredom. Yes, I know I wasn’t the brightest crayon in the box when I was young. I was drowning of course until this boy saved my life.

The only thing I remembered was that he was about my age back then, really tall, skinny, I couldn’t tell if his eyes were green or brown or even a mix, and he had hair almost resembling to the color of Kennedy’s, except maybe his hair was lighter…or not. Faulty memory. We hung out a couple of times until he just disappeared and I was back to playing by myself again, then I moved. I guess I owed my life to him.

After that random thought, I smiled at Kennedy, sneaking my arms back around him while he kept laughing at his mistake. When his laughter finally died down we were back in our previous position before letting go.

“Besides, I couldn’t handle a no Kennedy weekend.” I noted.

He smiled brightly after hearing me imply that I’d miss him greatly on my stay at my dad’s for two days before he would arrive. Yes, Kennedy was able to go, but not until he played a show with his band this weekend. After that he would be joining me on this trip. My mom was nice enough to ask my dad if Kennedy could come along. Heck, that was the only way my mom was going to get me to go.

I got lost in his gorgeous hazel eyes and had a strong urge to plant another kiss on his lips. That is until my mom called out to me.

“Amy, for the last time! Say goodbye to Kennedy and get in the car. You can see him in two days. We have a long drive ahead of us.”

I turned my head away from her and looked back at my boyfriend.

“I guess I have to go now.” I told him.

He nodded and leaned down to connect our lips one more time. When he retreated his lips from mine he gave me one last squeeze.

I really didn’t want to let go.