Pieces of the Heart

“Hailey, honey , you’ve been in bed all day; you need to eat something.” Linda cooed as she pushed a piece of her daughters hair out of her face.

“I’m not hungry,” Hailey mumbled as turned away from her mother.

“Can you at least tell me what’s wrong? You’re scaring me honey. You just showed up in the middle of the night, no call. Please, just talk to me.”

In response Hailey pulled the pillow over her head. Linda sighed in defeat and stood up, “I’ll be here when you’re ready; call if you need anything.”

Hearing the door click shut Hailey sighed and rolled onto her back. Silently she stared at the ceiling as she let her mind wander over the events of the night before.

I don’t love you Hailey; I’m sorry but I don’t… Why can’t you see he’s using you… I love you Hailey and I always will but I’m not going to wait around forever.

Hailey groaned as she pulled the pillow back over her head trying her best to ignore the scenes that had seemed to constantly replay themselves in her mind since Greg had left her apartment the night before.

I came to you for comfort; it was a mistake… I don’t love you Hailey…

Feeling tears run down the sides of her face Hailey bit her lip to silence the sob that wanted to break free. Greg had been right; Kevin had done nothing but use her. Why did she allow him to do that? He was married, she knew that; so why had she slept with him? It was wrong on so many levels… She was wrong on so many levels.

Sitting up she thought over the last few months of her life. What had happened to her? Seven months ago she had been so sure of her life and then poof everything shot to hell, all because of one little ring. Why did Greg have to changes things and why couldn’t she accept it?

Hearing the faint sounds of the living room TV Hailey climbed out of bed and went in search of her mother.

Linda sighed as she set a cup of coffee in front of her distraught daughter. When Hailey let out another gurgled sob she set the box of tissues closer before sitting beside her, “Hailey, darling you’ve been crying for five minutes straight; can you please tell me what’s wrong? You know I don’t like seeing you so upset.”

Hailey sniffed loudly as she looked up at her mother, “Oh mom, I’ve screwed everything up.”

“Oh Hailey,” Linda breathed as she pulled her daughter in her arms, “it can’t be that bad,” she added as she thought back to how upset Hailey had been when she had showed up the night before.

“But it is,” Hailey cried as Linda started running her hands through her hair, just as she did when Hailey was a child.

“I have all day honey, you just tell me when your ready,” Linda whispered as Hailey laid her head in her lap.

It took another ten minute of crying before Hailey calmed down enough to tell her story and Linda sat patiently running her hands rhythmically through her hair as Hailey unloaded her burdens involving the two men in her life.

When she finished Hailey rolled over so that she could look up at her mom, “What should I do?”

“I can’t tell you that.”

Hailey sighed, “I’ve really messed things up haven’t I?”

Linda smirked, “Well..”

Hailey let out a shaky laugh, “Gee, thanks mom.”

Linda laughed, “There’s that smile that I love.”

“But seriously what am I going to do?” Hailey asked as she sat up.

Linda thought for a moment before asking, “When Kevin told you that he didn‘t love you; what did you feel in that moment?”

Hailey sighed as she rested her head on her mothers shoulder, “Hurt, angry…Confused,” she bit her lip before adding, “Greg thinks Kevin is using me.”

“The question is, do you think he is?”

“I don’t know, maybe, I mean I’m not stupid, he’s still married but …” Hailey trailed off as she thought about Kevin’s actions towards her. The looks, the caresses, showing up on her door step, the sex, him walking out. She sighed, “I’ve been such an idiot ,haven‘t I?”

“Do you love him?” her mother questioned.

Hailey bit her lip as she pondered the question, “I think I was more in love with the idea of being in love with him. I don’t know, it was so weird when he moved back; it was like nothing had changed between us.” A small smile graced her lips, “ You know I’ve always had a bit of a soft spot for Kevin.”

Linda smiled as she thought back to how her daughter harbored a crush on Kevin when she was a teenager and the many times her daughter had cried or complained about him during that time; yes Hailey would always reserve a small piece of her heart just for him.

“And what about Greg?” She questioned.

Quietly she thought about her ex. She had always felt completely safe in his arms and when he would push that one lock of hair behind her ear and stare into her eyes her stomach would always flip. She thought about the first time he told her that he loved her and how incredibly happy she had felt in that moment. She thought about how happy he had been the first time she had whispered she had loved him as they cuddled after making love. She thought about all the things he done over the years to make to make her happy and then she about how she had done the same.

As tears began to fall once more from Hailey’s eyes Linda pulled her closer, “Hailey can I ask you a question?”

“hmm?”

“Why did you really say no to Greg when he proposed?”

Hailey began to cry harder as she thought about the day he proposed. How could she have gotten things so wrong?

“Hailey?”

“I…I’m scared,” She whispered.

Linda smiled sadly, “Why are you so scared honey?”

Hailey sniffed, “Because it changes things… look what happened to Aunt Erica and Uncle Steve, Kevin and Danielle… you and daddy…I didn’t want us to end up like that.”

“Honey, not every marriage ends in divorce.”

“What if mine did?” Hailey questioned.

“But what if it didn’t?” Linda countered.

“Mom, I’ve hurt him so much… I wouldn’t even know where to begin.”

“Do you love Greg?”

“Yes,” She responded without a second thought.

“Well then that‘s where you start.”