Great Expectations

"You and me could write a bad romance." - Lady Gaga

I stood in front of the mirror in my bedroom, staring at the girl who wasn’t really me. I had dressed myself as a flapper, in a red fringe dress and simple black heels, a long string of pearls around my neck. I had pinned a tall feather in my hair, which was pulled back into a sort of tuck. Black eyeliner lined my eyes, winged out at the edges, and my lips were bright red. For a few moments I looked for my small gold clutch, before I noticed it sitting on my desk. Glancing at the clock, I wondered when Poppy would arrive. She refused to go to Charity’s house alone, so I had agreed to drive her.

“Let’s get this over with,” she said from the door of my room. I turned to see her walk into my room and sit down on my bed. “I’m sure Charity’s going to be dressed as something outrageous. I bet she’ll show up as Lady Gaga, or a Playboy Bunny or something like that. God, I hate her, why am I going again?”

Shoulders slouched and arms crossed, Poppy looked like a bored Pocahontas. She wore a brown suede dress with fringe accents, moccasin boots, and few strands of colored wooden beads around her neck. Her hair was pulled down into two braids, tied with leather strips and feathers. “You think I look stupid,” she said, noticing I was staring at her outfit.

“No,” I said, picking up my purse and walking out of my bedroom. “It’s Halloween. Everyone looks a little silly – we’re all wearing costumes. And Lady Gaga would make a more interesting costume than a Playboy Bunny.”

“Yeah, at least Lady Gaga is creative,” Poppy said sarcastically. “Maybe she’ll go for something really unoriginal and dress up as the devil.”

I shook my head. “Mom, Dad, I’m leaving. I’ll see you later,” I called into my house as we walked downstairs. As I had expected, there was no reply. A few minutes later, we were on our way to Charity’s. Led Zeppelin filled the car, putting a small smile on Poppy’s face.

“You will never cease to amaze me,” she said. When I looked curiously at her, she continued. “Here’s this girl – this blue-eyed blond, and she’s driving a red BMW and what is she listening to? Led Zeppelin. One in a million, Jules. One in a million.”

“Thanks,” I said, a small smile on my face. “I guess it’s good that someone appreciates the fact that I know what good music is.”

“Of course I do,” Poppy said. “What the hell are best friends for?” We laughed, but the laughter quickly faded when I turned onto Charity’s street. I parked fairly close to the house, turning off the Led Zeppelin before anyone would realize I had been the one listening to it. People in school had no idea that perfect Juliet Hanson had a passionate love affair with classic rock. Like Poppy had said, that just didn’t fit with who I am – or how everyone saw me.

We walked across Charity’s lawn, into her sprawling house, where the lights were dimmed, the music was turned up, and everyone was talking. We were surrounded by cowboys, cheerleaders, vampires, and Greek gods. As we walked through the house, I saw Charity smiling, talking to her friends. She was dressed as a Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader. Poppy noticed this and rolled her eyes, muttering something that sounded like “dirty ho.”

“No, seriously,” she said, as we walked out to the back porch. “Why are we here?”

“I have no idea,” I said. “I thought it would be rude to not come.”

Poppy laughed. “This is Charity we’re talking about. I think she can probably handle a little rudeness.” She took a bottle from the cooler sitting open on the deck, opened it, and took a long drink, not caring what it was. “Oh, hey, there’s Kyle – I think that’s Kyle Bennett.” She was looking across the patio, where he was standing, wearing jeans and a flannel shirt.

“What’s his costume supposed to be?” I asked.

Poppy grinned. “I’ll go ask him.” She walked away, leaving me alone, outside, at Charity Dupree’s Halloween party. There was a cool breeze that made me shiver – I should have thought more about wearing a sleeveless dress. While I walked across the patio towards the living room doors, I wrapped my arms across my chest, trying to keep the wind from my bare skin.

Inside, it was much warmer, probably because there were so many more people. I felt like I was trapped, surrounded by classmates in masks. And costumes I didn’t recognize anyone, and even if I did, I would not have wanted to talk to them. I tried to look for Hunter – I knew he would be here – but I had no idea what his costume was, and I didn’t think texting him would be very successful.

Across the room stood someone who looked as lost as I did. His dark hair was slicked back and he wore jeans, a white t-shirt, and a leather jacket. He was obviously a ‘50s greaser, even if he dressed nearly the same on a normal day. I stood for a few moments, doing nothing but staring at him. He wouldn’t want me to talk to him; I still hadn’t stood up to my parents. Few people in school really knew what was going on between us.

We have to make ourselves happy.

I took a deep breath and walked resolutely across the room. Weaving in and out of people, I considered a million reasons why I should stop, turn around, find Poppy, and go home. I second-guessed myself, told myself this was a stupid decision, but my feet wouldn’t stop moving. Some part of me knew this was the right thing to do.

“Hey,” I said, finally standing in front of Dean.

“Hi,” he said, looking down at me. I wouldn’t let myself change my mind. I grabbed the collar of his leather jacket and pulled his face down to mine. I kissed him in the middle of the room, and it was the most satisfying feeling in the world.

He pulled away, fighting to keep a smile off his face. “Everyone’s gonna see us,” he said. “Your secret is out.”

“I don’t care,” I said. He pulled me close and kissed me again, in the middle of Charity Dupree’s living room at her Halloween party. Half the school was there – everyone would be talking about this tomorrow, but I didn’t care. I was finally starting to learn that it doesn’t matter what people think of you, as long as you’re happy.