Whatever Happened To Needing No One?

Dinner was a little awkward, to say the least, but no one else seemed to notice except me. I could feel Jonathan staring at me quite a bit, but I tried my best to ignore him. I spent most of dinner with my eyes on my plate, but when I did happen to glance up he was looking at me rather overconfidently. I get that some girls would throw themselves in front of a bus to have him look at them like that, but it was really starting to tick me off. Sure, from what I've heard he’s a superstar here in Chicago...but I'm not one of those girls...that doesn't impress me. And the fact that he thinks flashing me a smile or putting his number in my phone without my permission will get him a date is ridiculous. After dinner everyone went to the living room and turned on the TV. I made my way into the kitchen and began cleaning up to avoid any more uncomfortable staring contests. Out of nowhere Jonathan showed up and was leaning against the counter facing me. You've got a boyfriend, don't you? He wasn’t asking...it was a statement and he was awaiting confirmation.

No. I said as I went back to washing dishes. He looked at me for another second and then picked up a drying towel.

So why didn't you call me? He asked as he dried the dishes I was washing. I shrugged.

I don't know. I didn't feel like it. He looked at me and I knew from the look on his face that was probably the first time he’d ever heard that. I'm sure you're a great guy...I just..

You're a lesbian!

What?! No! We had stopped with the dishes and were facing each other. Just because I don't want to call you I either have a boyfriend or like girls?!

Well what is it then? I turned back to the sink. He was giving me a headache. Do you like blondes or something? I couldn't help but laugh. No I don't like blondes. He’s pretty much exactly what I like...physically anyways.

Jonny! Go sit down. I’ll dry. Jenna said, trying to take the towel from him as she entered the kitchen.

No, no! You cooked. You go sit. We’re almost done here. He replied turning away from her slightly.

She's right. Go sit. She can help me. He sent me a glare and I knew that if he left now we would just be having this conversation later.

Nope. I got it. This is probably the only time you're gonna see me offering to do dishes so take advantage of it and get outta here Jenna. He said and she left the kitchen. We carried on washing and drying for a couple of minutes in silence. When I washed the last plate he spoke up. Okay...so maybe I didn't approach this the right way. I looked at him. Can I take you out to dinner some time?

I really don't have all that much time. I'm crazy busy...and it’s only going to get worse once I start school.

You're too busy to have dinner? He asked, making me sound stupid.

Sorry...I really don't have any time. I said simply and left the kitchen.
- - -
After all the guys had left Jenna and I were sitting in the living room watching the news or something...I’m not really paying too much attention to it. All I’ve got in my head is Jonathan. Was I wrong to say no? My head was telling me no, I wasn’t wrong...but then why can’t I stop thinking about him? His smile, his gorgeous captivating eyes. The way he smells...even the cockiness is starting to grow on me the more I think about it. I've always hated those guys that know they're pretty fucking wonderful...but he makes it look good and, strangely, it’s kind of appealing to me. He’s cocky, but not stuck up. Something I haven’t seen too many times. He's used to girls throwing themselves at him, but he was still able to tone it down a notch and ask for a date. Maybe I should have said yes to dinner. I mean...it’s just dinner. UGHH! I shook my head at myself. This is exactly why I didn't call him. I'm not one of those girls that can do the casual dating thing. If I'm gonna date someone I put 100% into him, and right now I have to put everything I've got into work and school. I don't have time to date...and I know, I KNOW that if I go on one dinner date with Jonathan Toews I'm gonna be wanting to go on many more. Battling some inner demons over there, space cadet? I glanced up at Jenna. What's goin on?

Nothing. I replied. I really didn't want to talk about this.

It’s something. You look like you're thinkin so hard your head is gonna explode. How long was she watching me?! Are you okay?

Yah, Jen. I’m good. Just thinkin about school. That's all. She nodded, accepting my answer but I knew she wasn’t buying it. She's always been super good at reading me. Maybe I'm just one of those people that you can read like an open book...I don't know but whatever the reason is, Jenna’s always been able to tell when something’s goin on with me. This, however, is not something I want to discuss with her. There's not really anything to talk about, but she is dating one of Jonathan’s teammates and I'm sure she tells Adam a lot. The last thing I need is for Jonathan to find out that I'm daydreaming about him.