Elle.

The following day I went back to school to be met with the extreme amount of class work I had missed. The one week I miss all the teachers decide to actually teach. But the worse part was that our group projects in World History were due. When my name, along with Jude’s, was called it took all I had not to start crying on the stop. I slide out of the desk and walked to the front on the room feeling everyone’s eyes on my back.

“Where is Mr. Carrigan?” The teacher spoke up from behind her computer screen.

“He moved.” I whispered just loud enough for her to hear.

She grumbled before clicking a few times, probably taking him off her roll call. “ I assume you’ve still done the report?” I nodded and clung my tattered notebook closer. “Well then, let me hear it.”

I took a deep breath before flipping through the pages. “Jude and I shared a lot of things…Our parents were killed in the same car crash.” Once the words left my lips my body felt weightless and my limbs felt limp. Saying it out loud to someone else made it seem unreal.

“You’re joking right?” She peeped her eyes over the screen to check. I shook my head and stared down at a wet spot on the note book caused by a tear. She sighed and clicked a few times. “Alright, who wants to go next?”

That was it? I went through all this pain to tell her one measly sentence? I took my seat and waited for the bell to ring all the while wiping my eyes and taking deep calming breaths.

-

By the time lunch rolled around I was laying on one of the gym bleachers sending text messages to a boy that would never receive them. It seemed as if my life had hit a new all time low. I hadn’t seen McKenzie all day and even if I had there wasn’t a good chance she would even talk to me. But during the middle of about the ninth message I felt something or someone tap my knee. My eyes gazed over the screen of my phone to see the melancholy smile of Kenzie.

“Hey.” Her whisper held a mix of emotions and I couldn’t bring myself to reply. “I was going to put this on the couples page in the yearbook.” She placed a black and white photo of Jude and I at a party. “Gabe sent it to me…apparently he took it at the baby shower. I figured now you’d rather keep it yourself.”

I tried to smile at her and nod in a thankful way and I’m pretty sure she understood. When I finally managed to work up some words I apologized. “I’m sorry for everything, you know. As soon as you got Avery he was whisked away from you and it’s all my fault.” I sighed and tried to swallow the lump forming in my throat.

She laughed a little and explained herself. “I’m not going to lie and say it isn’t your fault but I’m happy that you and Jude got to visit your parents graves. I’m sure that means a lot to you two. Besides Avery and I had know since you two left they were really going to move. And I’m pretty sure our prom night made up for all the lost times.” Her mischievous grin nearly brought me out of my gloom all together. “So cheer up, buttercup!”

I let out a breath I hadn’t realized I was holding. “I can’t…he doesn’t have phone service! First she moves him an hour away from me and then she disconnects his phone. We now have no contact, at all.”

Something that flashed across her face should’ve been a sign to me. Maybe I just didn’t catch it or pay attention, but there was certainly something.

-

Later that night I headed back to the tiny hospital room filled with too many people. Pete and Bronx we’re arguing about some school assignment he had failed to do since coming to California, in which Bronx had the stronger argument considering he hadn’t been at school to get said assignment. And Reni was catching up with Zachery who had come down to help in any way he could. I was laying in the gurney next to a sleeping Ryan willing my own subconscious to take over with no results.

When I seemed to be falling in and out of dreams I felt a hand run through my hair. I rolled my head to the side and looked to see if Ryan had woken up, when I saw he was still in the peaceful state of sleep my mind began to race. I sat up and looked around at the practically empty room…except for one person.

“Jude?” I questioned and smiled widely. “What are you doing here?” He pulled me off the bed and into his arms, swinging around like he had before.

“Kenz got a hold of Avery and told me about Ry. I had to come see you.” He leaned up to kiss me. “The hard part was convincing Arabella to let me use her car.” Jude laughed and sat me back down on the edge of Ryan’s bed.

A small part inside suddenly felt like a small and alone child. “You left and I didn’t get to say goodbye.” My own voice would have annoyed me if my emotions hadn’t been playing a big role in the way I was acting.

“I know, and I’m sorry, but there was no way I would’ve been able to wake you.” He smiled before leaning down to kiss the tip of my nose.

I wrinkled it and giggled. “How long will I be graced with your presence?” His shoulders slumped and I could tell it wouldn’t be good news.

“Only for tonight, Caroline thinks I had to go pick up my transcripts.” He sighed and looked down at the digital watch around his left wrist. “I should’ve been home by now.”

“How long have you been here?” It was entirely too soon for him to be leaving me.

“A few hours…have I mentioned how cute you are when you’re asleep?” He laughed before pulling out a spiffy cell phone out of his pocket. “Bells let me take her phone too, sometimes she isn’t all bad you know?” I rolled my eyes and waited while Jude made his call. “Hey Rob, can you make an excuse for me? I’m going to stay the night.” He sent me a mischievous grin before hanging up.

“Oh Jude, you’re so bad. We have school tomorrow.” He shrugged before falling onto the couch the Wentz’s had been on.

“I’d rather be with you.”