Elle.

My heels clicked against the Los Angeles airport floor as I walked down one of the many corridors pulling a roll along suitcase behind me. I smiled at the familiar sound that I loved and now had a better understanding of why it brought me such joy.

I had always seen women shopping with their girlfriends, all dressed up including heels. I associated that with meaning you were grown up and important. The want to be like those women walking around in their heels fueled my nearly $500 obsession with shoes. Or maybe it was just because I didn’t have my mother to spoil me with a girl’s day out, not that Ryan didn’t spoil me- because trust me he did, but for some reason I had lived my life trying to me twenty years older than I was.

The thought bubble I was in popped when Reni spoke up. “I’m really going to miss you, Elle.”

My head bobbed up and I tried to smile, I had almost forgotten why I was at the airport. Reni and Zachery were headed back to New York to get remarried and try to salvage Zach’s career as a priest. “I’ll miss you too. But you’ll be back right?”

Reni tucked a loose orange curl behind her ear and smiled back. “Of course! I can’t stay away from Cali for long.” I’d never noticed it but Reni was one of the women I would’ve looked up to when I was younger, she always looked her best for any occasion.

“I really wish you and Zach would have the ceremony here.” Since the two had reconnected and decided their divorce was a huge mistake, my uncle had re-proposed and they already had a new date set.

She nodded and pulled her plane ticket out of her jacket pocket. “I know, I do too, but Zach wants to have it at his church and I understand that. I wish you would just come with me!” She smiled and tugged on my arm like a child.

“Oh believe me I would but you know there’s this little thing that always seems to get in the way of things I want to do.” I rolled my eyes at the thought of school.

She sighed and leaned in to hug me. “I promise I’ll come back as soon as possible. And don’t think you’ll be missing something, it’ll probably just be me, Zach, and a priest.”

“Isn’t that the way it’s suppose to be?” I smiled and waved them off as they boarded the plane.

-

Ryan sat in the driver’s seat of the car ,that now seemed to be mostly mine, and waited on me to return from seeing them off. Though he was feeling better his doctor didn’t think he was quite up to leaving the house. So technically he was breaking one of the many rules he had.

And just the other night he broke a major one by having a “celebratory” drink in honor of the new engagement. And I won’t deny that I think he deserved the stomach ache he got later that night.

I tried to push all those thoughts aside as I slid into the passenger’s seat. I put on my best fake smile and turned to Ryan. His skeptical eyes peered back at mine.

“What do you want, Elle?” He cautious whisper was all I needed to unleash my large request.

I bounced in my seat as I pulled my legs up into the indian position. “Would you mind taking me to see Jude?” I tried to think positive and hopeful as I made my argument. “It’s been weeks since we went to the beach and I haven’t even been able to talk to him.”

Ryan let out a deep sigh that made him sound as if he were so tired that he hadn’t spelt in days. “Do you really think that is a good idea Elle? Don’t you have a ton of school work to catch up on? You claim to never see that boy but you’ve missed nearly half a month of school because of him. Does that not even bother you? Do you not care about your future? He isn’t everything you know. You’re almost failing three classes and I got a call from your history teacher the other day.”

“What did she say?” My timid voice came from the car seat I had slumped down into.

“First she told me about your assignment.” His eyes cut over to me as he continued. “Now I know why you were so interested in finding your mom. And then she told me about the report you gave. And that you failed it.”

I sat up in my seat with rage and began to rant to Ryan, even flailing with my hands. “That bitch! I can’t believe she gave me an F! What was I suppose to say, I didn’t even know I had to give my report that day! I had nothing written down, only a few notes in my notebook.”

Ryan’s look told me that he obviously didn’t care. “What do you plan to do with your future Elle? Spending it with him?” I could tell he was about to go on his own rant so I took a deep breath and prepared myself. “I don’t want you to end up like me. I made so many bad choices growing up and I don’t want you to crash and burn like me. More than anything I want you to go to college. And I don’t see you making it there with the grades you’ve got.”

“Ryan, trust me, I’m going to go to college. And yeah, I have a few bad grades,” That earned an eye roll. “But I’ve pretty much made up all the home work in detention and they should be coming up soon.” Oh did I forget to mention the school gave me after school detention for skipping so much? Well they did.

He simply nodded and I realized we had turned on to a quieter street. “You’re seriously going to take me to see him?” The excitement in my voice was evident.

“Of course, why wouldn’t I?” I could tell he had a small smile on his lips as he pulled up to a large brick house.

I leaned over to quickly kiss his cheek before rushing up to the front door.