Legion Of Rockstars

My jaw dropped. Right there, fifteen feet from me, sat Joan Jett. The Joan Jett, decked out in all black and looking damn sexy for a fifty-something rock chick from the 80s. She sat behind a humongous desk, and behind her the entire wall was a big sheet of glass looking out over the forest. Ms. Jett---no, Joan---no, Ms. Joan—oh, whatever, stood up from the large leather chair and stepped around the side of the desk. She smiled and nodded her head towards Amy.

“Thank you, Amy,” she said. Then, she focused her dark gaze on my face and motioned with her hand for me to step forward. I took a slow step forward, concentrating more than I needed to so I wouldn’t fall over and make a fool of myself. Behind me, Amy closed the door, leaving the Joan Jett and I alone.

“Hello, Asher, I’m Joan Jett,” Joan introduced herself, taking a few steps forward as she extended her hand for me to shake. I gladly shook her hand, not trusting myself to speak quite yet. I mean, I’ve admired her for years. She pretty much paved the way for rocker chicks to just be themselves, and I know that she blew half the rocker dudes from the 80s away. And she did it with such fabulous style, too.

“I know that you’ll make a fine addition to the Legion,” Joan continued, releasing my hand and stepping back around her desk. She motioned for me to sit down in one of the chairs across from her desk, and I quickly obeyed as she sat back down in her chair. “I know you’re wondering what the hell this Legion is all about. Put quite simply, it was created for the preservation of rock and roll. You may not realize it, but rock is a fairly new genre. It’s a very dynamic genre as well, with many different branches and types. And since rock is new on the music scene, we have to work extra hard to make sure it continues to live in the hearts and minds of people all over the world.

“Elvis started the Legion in the 50s. It started out as just a group he put together; they met in an abandoned old warehouse not far from here. But boy, it caught on like wildfire. And it’s been going strong ever since. Every generation of rockers have joined—from the 60s on to the new age—creating a wide range of different talents and agents from many different time periods. And this Legion isn’t the only one in the world; there are several of them, all over—in Europe, Asia, Australia, practically every continent dedicated to the preservation of rock.

“Right this second, our biggest threat are those damned Jonas Brothers and their female counterpart Miley Cyrus,” Joan said, her tone gaining a slight snarl as she mentioned their names. Obviously their names were mud in this place. “God, if I had a gun and met them in a dark alley, they wouldn’t live to see the other side of that alley.”

“I bought a Hannah Montana shirt once just to watch it burn,” I put in, speaking for the first time since I’d met Joan. She smiled at me, so I decided that I hadn’t said something wrong.

“I think I like you already, Asher,” Joan replied. “Oh, there’s also a male director. I’m sure his is a familiar name too: Ozzy Osbourne. I make the decisions, and Ozzy sees to it that they’re carried out.”

“I have a question about him,” I said, a thought bursting into my brain.

“Ask away.”

“Is he really that hard to understand when he talks?”

Joan smiled. “Only when he’s drunk. Any other time, he’s clear as a bell.” She rose to her feet, and I followed suit. We shook hands again before she called Amy back in. “Listen, Asher, I worked my way up to director. And I think, if you work hard and prove yourself in this Legion, you’ll have the makings to stand exactly where I am now.”

“Thanks,” I replied as Amy stepped into the office behind us.

“Good luck, Asher,” Joan said. I nodded in thanks before following Amy back out into the lounge.