‹ Prequel: All Your Sorrows Crumble in My Arms
Forever and Always
Where Do Babies Come From?
"Damnit, MC, stop." I smacked him lightly on the leg as he kicked my shin with his hard shoes in the waiting room of the hospital.
"Bo-ored." MC whined and rubbed at his eyes.
I sighed and picked up a bag of his stuff. At the top was his CD player with the guys' second CD in it. I handed him the headphones, "Here listen to Daddy."
"I don't want to." He said petulantly, slinging the headphones away.
"MC!" I frowned at him, "What is wrong with you?"
"I want my daddy." He kicked again, hitting the spot that he continually had all night long.
"Yeah, well, Daddy wouldn't be very happy with how you're acting. You can either lay down and listen to Daddy and your uncles and take a nap or you can go back to Grandpa's with Mischa." Mischa was my father's housekeeper. MC hadn't seemed very fond of her.
"No!" He laid down hard on the bench and grabbed at the head phones. I rolled my hoodie, brought reluctantly on tour at Matt's urging, into a pillow and laid under his head. Matt had sent his hoodie with me for good measure and I spread it across MC's small body for a blanket. Less than the time it took two songs on the CD to pass, he was asleep, his thumb tucked into his mouth. I thought about removing it, remembering how Matt had voiced that maybe MC was getting too old for that small comfort and then shrugged it off. He only did it when Matt wasn't around and the first couple of days after he come home from tour.
My father rubbed my shoulder as he paced the floor behind me, "He's out like a light."
"He usually is when he puts those things on. He needed the nap though, he's been up for a while and the time change and everything. How's Anna doing? Any word?"
He nodded, "They're in recovery now. We'll be able to go back and see her in about an hour or so. We can see the baby though. You want to go and I'll watch MC?"
I cocked my head, "Have you been to see her?"
"No, I want to wait until Anna feels up to it. I want to see her together." He smiled a bit. I did so back, hesitantly. Despite myself, I felt a little jealousy rear it's ugly head because I knew that my birth wasn't something my parents cherished-they were divorced shortly before I was born.
"Okay. If he wakes, just tell him I'll be back in a moment. He'll probably go right back to sleep." I sighed and stood, making my way to the nursery.
Above the heads of the babies laid out were their last names. When I found Nordstrum, printed carefully in small lettering for it was a big name on such a small paper, I had to smile. She was so tiny, still in an incubator and only half the size of the other babies, but you could tell she was the one filling the nursery with her loud cries. Her face was red and straining and she was not happy. Not even Rodney, my stupid older brother, could deny that this kid was a Nordstrum.
When I came back, MC ran at me full force, "I wanna see the baby!"
I laughed, "You ready to see your aunt?"
His face crinkled in confusion, "Huh?"
"This baby is my little sister. That makes her your aunt, like Aunt Laura and Lorrie." No use explaining that Laura and Lorrie weren't actually his aunts. He'd never believe that since that's all they'd ever been called to him but it did help explain it better. He nodded and caught my hand. I was surprised at how well behaved he was now that he'd had a ten minute or so nap.
As soon as he saw her, he was full of a thousand questions. I answered them the best I can but there was one I saved for Matt-the question.
"Mommy?"
"Hum?" I stroked his fuzzy hair, cut identically like his father's.
"Where do babies come from?" He frowned up at me.
I soothed his frown, "I have an idea . . .why don't you ask Daddy that question?"
"Okay! Can we call him?" He bounced eagerly.
I shook my head, "No, baby. We have to wait a while, then we can. Come on, let's go tell Grandpa how pretty the new baby is."
Except for the fact that my father had no interest in that when I got there. He thrust a cell phone at me, "It's Matt and he's not very happy."
I sighed, "Hey, love."
"Hmmm. Hey. We have a problem." Nice way to start a conversation isn't it? My gruff-voiced fiance thought so.
"What's that?" I sat down and pulled MC onto my lap to keep him near.
"Apparently our son belongs to Johnny." He huffed.
"What the fuck?" I glanced at MC to see that he hadn't even registered the slip of the tongue, "What do you mean?"
"I mean that some snot rag of a photographer got a picture of you and Johnny walking back to the bus the other night with MC on Johnny's arm and apparently they think something's going on. There's pictures of us three and then the picture of you three and it says: Not so Fresh-faced and Innocent, Avenged Sevenfold's Trophy Girl Has Two Baby's Daddies. Who Does The Kid Belong To? And beneath it it points out that MC has Johnny's chin and short stature-of course they think he's like seven-and none of my features."
I almost laughed. MC looked exactly like Matt. What were these people smoking? "And I suppose it says that I'm involving us all in a hot and heavy love triangle that involves the custody of our son and will eventually tear up the world's hottest band?"
"Something along those lines, yeah." He sighed.
"Well all we can do is do damage control, love, when I get back. Make sure that everyone knows it's us and him and not me and him and Johnny. This sucks, I agree but there's not a whole lot to do about it." I kissed MC's head when he leaned back into me.
"I know, I just figured you'd like to know before you got back home and saw all the bullshit going on." His whole tone changed and now he was asking questions about Anna and the baby. By the time we got done talking and he told MC that he loved him, Daddy was waving at us to come and see Anna.
She was pale and tired, but practically seemed to glow. She pulled me to her and kissed my cheeks, a custom she'd gotten use to in the past four years of living in Paris, "How're you doing?"
"I'm just fine, but who cares? How're you feeling?" I hugged her gently.
"Great, actually, other than a little soreness. Is this baby Matthew?" She pointed at my son.
I smiled, "Yeah, this is little MC. He's grown a lot hasn't he?"
"He's huge, but if I remember correctly, so is his daddy. How're you and Matt doing?" She reached out to ruffle MC's hair.
"Great! He just called a few moments ago and he sends his love to both you and the baby. He says congratulations, Daddy." I smiled over her to my dad and noticed it did me no good. He had eyes only for her.
"Well, the doctor should be in here in a few to tell me when I can go see her." Anna smiled, obviously anticipating it very much, "Have you seen her, Lester?"
"No, no. I'm waiting for you. Dani and MC went to see her though." He patted her hand lovingly.
I couldn't help but to grin, "She's beautiful, Daddy. Isn't the baby pretty, MC?"
He nodded vigorously, obviously getting shy around his grandparents that he hadn't ever really seen. My dad and Anna were both just voices over the phone and presents by UPS or First Class Mail. His only grandparents that he knew well were Grandpa and Grandma Sanders, who he called Nan and Pop, much to their embarrassed pleasure.
Anna smiled, "I don't know why Lester called for you to come all the way over here, but I'm glad he did. It's sad that I feel like I should ask my step-daughter for tips on the first few months of being a parent."
"Not really sad, just more like unusual. The best thing to remember is that she's not made of glass. It took me forever to convince Matt and the guys that MC wouldn't break. As precious as they are, sleepless nights and diaper changes are worth it no matter how much it seems they aren't." I rubbed MC's back, "And they're not extensions of ourselves. You can't expect her to reflect your mood. You could be tired and need a nap but she's wide awake. That part's not easy but you get use to it."
"I'm a light sleeper." Dad confessed, "Rodney use to drive me nuts cause all he did was scream all night every night."
"I have a feeling that this one probably will too, Dad. She was already screaming her head off." I laughed and watched him groan. We talked for a long time more before the nurse came in and said that she was bringing the baby up for her first feeding from her mother.
I looked over at Dad, "I think I'm going to take MC to your house, let him eat and take another nap. Maybe catch some sleep myself and get the baby's nursery ready."
He nodded and kissed my cheek, "Thanks, Daniellea. We appreciate you coming here."
"More than you know." Anna pulled me down for another double-cheek peck and blew a kiss
at MC, "Bye, MC."
He waved shyly and clung to me, only grinning when Dad reached over and rumpled his short hair.
"Bo-ored." MC whined and rubbed at his eyes.
I sighed and picked up a bag of his stuff. At the top was his CD player with the guys' second CD in it. I handed him the headphones, "Here listen to Daddy."
"I don't want to." He said petulantly, slinging the headphones away.
"MC!" I frowned at him, "What is wrong with you?"
"I want my daddy." He kicked again, hitting the spot that he continually had all night long.
"Yeah, well, Daddy wouldn't be very happy with how you're acting. You can either lay down and listen to Daddy and your uncles and take a nap or you can go back to Grandpa's with Mischa." Mischa was my father's housekeeper. MC hadn't seemed very fond of her.
"No!" He laid down hard on the bench and grabbed at the head phones. I rolled my hoodie, brought reluctantly on tour at Matt's urging, into a pillow and laid under his head. Matt had sent his hoodie with me for good measure and I spread it across MC's small body for a blanket. Less than the time it took two songs on the CD to pass, he was asleep, his thumb tucked into his mouth. I thought about removing it, remembering how Matt had voiced that maybe MC was getting too old for that small comfort and then shrugged it off. He only did it when Matt wasn't around and the first couple of days after he come home from tour.
My father rubbed my shoulder as he paced the floor behind me, "He's out like a light."
"He usually is when he puts those things on. He needed the nap though, he's been up for a while and the time change and everything. How's Anna doing? Any word?"
He nodded, "They're in recovery now. We'll be able to go back and see her in about an hour or so. We can see the baby though. You want to go and I'll watch MC?"
I cocked my head, "Have you been to see her?"
"No, I want to wait until Anna feels up to it. I want to see her together." He smiled a bit. I did so back, hesitantly. Despite myself, I felt a little jealousy rear it's ugly head because I knew that my birth wasn't something my parents cherished-they were divorced shortly before I was born.
"Okay. If he wakes, just tell him I'll be back in a moment. He'll probably go right back to sleep." I sighed and stood, making my way to the nursery.
Above the heads of the babies laid out were their last names. When I found Nordstrum, printed carefully in small lettering for it was a big name on such a small paper, I had to smile. She was so tiny, still in an incubator and only half the size of the other babies, but you could tell she was the one filling the nursery with her loud cries. Her face was red and straining and she was not happy. Not even Rodney, my stupid older brother, could deny that this kid was a Nordstrum.
When I came back, MC ran at me full force, "I wanna see the baby!"
I laughed, "You ready to see your aunt?"
His face crinkled in confusion, "Huh?"
"This baby is my little sister. That makes her your aunt, like Aunt Laura and Lorrie." No use explaining that Laura and Lorrie weren't actually his aunts. He'd never believe that since that's all they'd ever been called to him but it did help explain it better. He nodded and caught my hand. I was surprised at how well behaved he was now that he'd had a ten minute or so nap.
As soon as he saw her, he was full of a thousand questions. I answered them the best I can but there was one I saved for Matt-the question.
"Mommy?"
"Hum?" I stroked his fuzzy hair, cut identically like his father's.
"Where do babies come from?" He frowned up at me.
I soothed his frown, "I have an idea . . .why don't you ask Daddy that question?"
"Okay! Can we call him?" He bounced eagerly.
I shook my head, "No, baby. We have to wait a while, then we can. Come on, let's go tell Grandpa how pretty the new baby is."
Except for the fact that my father had no interest in that when I got there. He thrust a cell phone at me, "It's Matt and he's not very happy."
I sighed, "Hey, love."
"Hmmm. Hey. We have a problem." Nice way to start a conversation isn't it? My gruff-voiced fiance thought so.
"What's that?" I sat down and pulled MC onto my lap to keep him near.
"Apparently our son belongs to Johnny." He huffed.
"What the fuck?" I glanced at MC to see that he hadn't even registered the slip of the tongue, "What do you mean?"
"I mean that some snot rag of a photographer got a picture of you and Johnny walking back to the bus the other night with MC on Johnny's arm and apparently they think something's going on. There's pictures of us three and then the picture of you three and it says: Not so Fresh-faced and Innocent, Avenged Sevenfold's Trophy Girl Has Two Baby's Daddies. Who Does The Kid Belong To? And beneath it it points out that MC has Johnny's chin and short stature-of course they think he's like seven-and none of my features."
I almost laughed. MC looked exactly like Matt. What were these people smoking? "And I suppose it says that I'm involving us all in a hot and heavy love triangle that involves the custody of our son and will eventually tear up the world's hottest band?"
"Something along those lines, yeah." He sighed.
"Well all we can do is do damage control, love, when I get back. Make sure that everyone knows it's us and him and not me and him and Johnny. This sucks, I agree but there's not a whole lot to do about it." I kissed MC's head when he leaned back into me.
"I know, I just figured you'd like to know before you got back home and saw all the bullshit going on." His whole tone changed and now he was asking questions about Anna and the baby. By the time we got done talking and he told MC that he loved him, Daddy was waving at us to come and see Anna.
She was pale and tired, but practically seemed to glow. She pulled me to her and kissed my cheeks, a custom she'd gotten use to in the past four years of living in Paris, "How're you doing?"
"I'm just fine, but who cares? How're you feeling?" I hugged her gently.
"Great, actually, other than a little soreness. Is this baby Matthew?" She pointed at my son.
I smiled, "Yeah, this is little MC. He's grown a lot hasn't he?"
"He's huge, but if I remember correctly, so is his daddy. How're you and Matt doing?" She reached out to ruffle MC's hair.
"Great! He just called a few moments ago and he sends his love to both you and the baby. He says congratulations, Daddy." I smiled over her to my dad and noticed it did me no good. He had eyes only for her.
"Well, the doctor should be in here in a few to tell me when I can go see her." Anna smiled, obviously anticipating it very much, "Have you seen her, Lester?"
"No, no. I'm waiting for you. Dani and MC went to see her though." He patted her hand lovingly.
I couldn't help but to grin, "She's beautiful, Daddy. Isn't the baby pretty, MC?"
He nodded vigorously, obviously getting shy around his grandparents that he hadn't ever really seen. My dad and Anna were both just voices over the phone and presents by UPS or First Class Mail. His only grandparents that he knew well were Grandpa and Grandma Sanders, who he called Nan and Pop, much to their embarrassed pleasure.
Anna smiled, "I don't know why Lester called for you to come all the way over here, but I'm glad he did. It's sad that I feel like I should ask my step-daughter for tips on the first few months of being a parent."
"Not really sad, just more like unusual. The best thing to remember is that she's not made of glass. It took me forever to convince Matt and the guys that MC wouldn't break. As precious as they are, sleepless nights and diaper changes are worth it no matter how much it seems they aren't." I rubbed MC's back, "And they're not extensions of ourselves. You can't expect her to reflect your mood. You could be tired and need a nap but she's wide awake. That part's not easy but you get use to it."
"I'm a light sleeper." Dad confessed, "Rodney use to drive me nuts cause all he did was scream all night every night."
"I have a feeling that this one probably will too, Dad. She was already screaming her head off." I laughed and watched him groan. We talked for a long time more before the nurse came in and said that she was bringing the baby up for her first feeding from her mother.
I looked over at Dad, "I think I'm going to take MC to your house, let him eat and take another nap. Maybe catch some sleep myself and get the baby's nursery ready."
He nodded and kissed my cheek, "Thanks, Daniellea. We appreciate you coming here."
"More than you know." Anna pulled me down for another double-cheek peck and blew a kiss
at MC, "Bye, MC."
He waved shyly and clung to me, only grinning when Dad reached over and rumpled his short hair.