Forever and Always

They brought baby Ella Maria "Emma" Nordstrum home from the hospital five days later, looking a lot healthier than she had in the incubator. MC was enthralled and soon began to pester me about having a baby sister or brother. We'd been there almost a month when I woke up with a pang of loneliness that felt like it was ripping my own heart out. MC woke up a few moments after me and stumbled into my room, a whine sounding from his lips, "I no sleepy anymore."

I held my arms out to him, "Come here, little man."

He climbed up on the bed and sighed, "Daddy."

"I know, I miss him too. I think it's time to go find Daddy." I reached for the nightsand and pushed 1 on my cell phone to dial Matt's number. I turned it on speaker so that MC could hear his voice when he answered.

It sounded groggy, "Yeah?"

"Hey baby."

"Oh my God, Daniellea. Princess, I miss you and MC so much." He immediately sounded more awake.

"I know, we miss you too. We want to come to you." MC was crying silent tears, reaching for the phone. I wiped them away and whispered in his ear for him to tell Daddy he loved him.

"Daddy, I love you."

"Aw, little man, Daddy loves you too. Are you ready to come home with Mommy?" Matt sniffled after saying this, betraying himself.

"Yeah!" MC crawled over me, "Daddy, I want a baby sister."

"Or brother." I prodded him.

"Or brother."

Matt laughed, "Um, okay, bud, me and Mommy will work on that, promise. Princess, can you catch a flight to Houston day after tomorrow? That's our next stop."

"Let me check." I nudged MC away so that I could go and check the internet on the computer in my room. I could hear MC chattering away about baby Emma and the hospital and Anna and smiled at Matt's patient, excited answers. He was so good with MC. Finally I got confirmation of our tickets and flight time, "Yeah, we can be there at seven a.m. Houston time."

"I'll be there if I have to drive the bus there myself." He sighed, "Want to know what's been happening?"

"Sure." Sounded somewhat serious.

"Johnny wanted to quit the band."

"What? Why?" I sank to the bed.

"Because he thought he was the cause of all that bullshit in the papers. I told him not to be stupid-he'd just be giving them proof that they were right if he quit."

This was certainly true, "What'd he say then?"

"Not a whole lot, he just conceded to me. Oh, Laura and Maria have decided that they've kept Jimmy and Brian apart too long." He chuckled, "And brought three boxes of each of their stuff to them at the last venue. Almost before they were at the door, Brian had Jimmy against the wall. It was funny in a weird way."

I laughed, "I always knew it would happen. They were too right in highschool for them to continue on like they were. I'm just surprised it wasn't Jimmy that jumped Brian."

He sniggered, "Brian's not had any in two months from anything, of course he was gonna rape Jimmy."

"Matt." I warned, suddenly more aware that MC could still hear us.

"Oops. Mmm, I need a shower. Hurry here and take a shower with me." He sighed.

I smiled, "I wish I could. I hate taking showers by myself."

"Me too. Fuck, I'm running late as it is. I love you, baby. I'll see you in two days right?" He sounded anxious.

"Yes, two days. I love you too." I prodded MC, who grinned a bit.

"Bye, bye, Daddy."

"Bye, little man. I love you." Matt hung up as soon as he said the words.

I couldn't wait to get home.

*****

"Fuck, princess." Matt groaned out and bit into my neck, his hips slamming into mine as I arched my back into his every thrust, "You're always so . . ."

He didn't have the breath to finish and I didn't care as I raked my nails down his back, making an attempt to pull him in more. He grunted and reached for my leg, moving us both so that his next thrust went deeper and he spilled over into me, my breathless cry drowning out his moan of satisfaction. He pulled back moments later, his breath still coming in gasps and kissed my swollen mouth, "I missed you so much."

I smiled, "I missed you too, way too much."

He stroked my face, "Never go so far away again with out me?"

"I'll try not to. We weren't there an hour before I missed you unbearably, much more than I do when you go on tour." I hugged him tighter, his sweat not bothering me like it did most of the time. Everything about him was comforting, enticing, arousing tonight.

Long, broad fingers delved into my hair to pull my head back enough so that our eyes
met, "Loneliness is compounded when ocean's separate us."

I smiled, having been use to the way Matt talked, almost in lyrical form sometimes, for years now, "That's certainly the truth. The only time I could remember missing you even as much is when you went to Ireland."

He kissed my fingers as I traced his strong features and nodded, agreeing that that time had been bad too. After a few quieter moments, he prodded me gently, "What was this whole baby sister or brother thing about?"

"MC was completely taken with Emma. He thought she was like a new toy that he had to be extremely careful with and just absolutely loved her. He wants one he'll be around all the time. He was happy to be coming back to his daddy, but he cried when he learned Emma wasn't coming with us." I smiled.

He chuckled, "Well, we do spoil him rotten, so I hope we do go through with this request."

I hoped so too. I just laughed and nodded, tucking my head into his shoulder again. He pulled the covers of the hotel bed up over us, kissing my forehead, "Tomorrow, before the show, I'm going to take MC out and it's just going to be me and him. And when we go home, we're going to go fishing and take him. I missed my son, Dani."

I nodded, "And your son missed you. He'll enjoy all that. He hasn't gotten to spend loads of time with you since . . .forever."

"I know and I'm going to change that. Hell, it's not like when we're at home recording I couldn't take him with me every once in a while. He'd learn a lot and he likes to hear us play so it's not like he'd be bored or a big hassle."

I could tell he was getting more and more into the idea. I knew MC would love it. I yawned and curled into him more. He kissed the back of my head, "Good night, princess. I love you."

What wouldn't I give up to hear that phrase every night of my life as I was falling asleep in his arms?