You Were Never A Friend To Me, And You Can Keep All Your Misery

I Guess I'll Go Home Now...

Stella's P.O.V.

The next few weeks were hell. All I could do was wait...and wait.

But, I was anything but calm. I was nervous. I was scared, and paranoid. So many questions swarmed around in my head, unanswered. Where are they now? Is Alex thinking about me? Is he still mad at me?

And most importantly...has he met someone else?

I waited. That's all I could do. I tried to ignore Martin as much as possible. It's hard to believe I liked him more than a friend. He reminds me too much of Max. So, basically it's like having a relationship with my brother.

Uh, ew?

So, in attempt to do something other than mope around my apartment all day, I headed out to the mall. I was tempted to go into Hot Topic, but I knew I shouldn't because Zoey works there.

Oh, what the hell? What are the chances that she's working on a Saturday night?

Pretty good, apparently.

"Welcome to Hot Topic" She said bitterly to me.

I didn't respond, I just kept my head up, searching through the band tees.

"So how's my boyfriend?" She asked, trying to look like she's helping me with something.

"You probably know better than me" I said quietly.

"Hm. You broke up?"

"Yeah"

I wasn't sure if we broke up, but after all that happened, the chances are good.

"Why, because he mentioned me?"

"Tell me, Zoey. When do you actually talk to Alex?"

She was silent. "...Well-"

"Exactly. Do you even know him?"

"Yes! I know his favorite color, band, food-"

"But do you really know anything about him?"

When she didn't respond, I knew the fight was over. But, not really.

"Why did you break up?" She asked skeptically.

"It's complicated" I said, skipping an All Time Low shirt.

"Is it because of me?"

"Partly. I think it's mostly because of me, though"

"Why?"

I didn't know why Zoey was asking me these questions, but she looked thoroughly interested, so I figured, why not?

"I have commitment issues or something" i shrugged.

"Oh"

I swallowed, feeling over my stomach at the sudden urge to puke."Do you have a bathroom in here?"

Zoey shrugged and pointed to the back. I scooted to the bathroom and threw up.

"Are you okay?" Zoey asked, more out of disgust than worry.

"Yeah. I'm gonna go" I said, for the first time leaving Hot Topic with out new clothes.

I headed to my parents' house next for dinner, since for the past week I was eating nonstop take-out. I was so hungry lately, I didn't care what I ate. If it's food, it's food. If I got fat, who cares? I don't have Alex anymore...

"Honey, slow down. You're eating like a horse!" My mother snapped.

I dropped my fork and looked onto my lap, blushing. I heard Max, Martin, and my dad chuckle.

"Sorry" I said quietly.

"So, why didn't you got on tour with the boys?" my father asked.

Because I wasn't invited.

"No reason. I guess I wasn't up for it this year" I nodded.

"Are you okay?" Max asked.

"Yep"

"Are you sure, dear? First, you don't eat, then you won't stop eating. Did you and Alex fight?" My mom asked.

"Mom" I groaned.

"They broke up" Martin announced. I kicked him from under the table, and he yelped.

"Oh, hon, I'm so sorry" My mom said, touching my hand.

I pulled it away. "I'm fine" I lied.

"And that boy was so nice" She said in a disapproving tone, shaking her head, as if she was blaming me.

"Yeah, a real gentleman" I muttered.

"I think the whole situation is jacked up" My dad said.

My dad always says things like jacked up to substitute words like fucked up.

My stomach felt like it was being turned inside out, and I muttered an apology, leaving the table, to make it in time to the bathroom. I threw up.

Again.

Instead of going back to the table to face more ridicule, I sat against the wall next to the toilet after brushing my teeth, and buried my head in my hands.

I'm such a mess.

"Stella?" I heard a light knock.

"What, mom?"

"Are you okay?"

I was so sick of hearing that. "No"

My mom walked in and I stood up awkwardly, as she pulled me into a hug. Me and my mom never hug, except when we haven't seen each other for a while.

"Mom?" I sniffed.

"Shh..it's okay"

"Mom, you're suffocating me"

She let go and smiled at me. "Have you been throwing up a lot?"

"Yeah...I think it's the nerves. I never got broken up with before"

"Or it could be something else"

I looked into my mom's eyes. They were sad, knowing. It took me seconds to process what she was getting at.

"I'm not pregnant!"

"That's what they all say"

"I'm not pregnant, okay?! God!" I exclaimed, pushing her aside.

"Where are you going, young lady?"

"Home!" I shouted before leaving.

I drove home in shock. I never thought about being pregnant. It was so gross. I mean, something...alive inside of me?

But it did explain things. The vomiting, the eating...oh my god.

I went home and slept, trying to escape the mess I was in. But in the morning, it was still there. I went into the bathroom and took off my camisole, revealing my flat stomach. it felt unusually hard. Maybe a little bigger. A bump? Was it my imagination!?

Angela and ATL were coming home later!

I put on an oversized hoodie to hide my bump and crawled back into bed. We used condoms, right?

I was getting too anxious. I had to call Angela.

"Hey, girly. We're gonna be home in about an hour"

"Um, can you do me a huge favor and get me something?"

"Yeah, sure, what is it?"

"A pregnancy test"

♠ ♠ ♠

I KNEW YOU GUYS WOULD GET IT!! well, it was pretty predictable once she started throwing up.

But is she really pregnant?

So DIDJA find out what they were missing? A condom, duuhhh

No glove, no love, peeps (-: