Dear Jerk-face

Dear Jerk-face,

I didn't know what to expect when I stepped on your porch and rang your doorbell. Depending on who answered the door, the situation could have gone three ways. One, your mom could have answered the door and I would explain that Jake lost his Optimus Prime toy and I was wondering if he left it at your house, even though I knew very well he didn't. Two, Melony could have answered the door and I would say I was there to take her to Build-a-Bear or something, for leaving her party early. Or three, you could have answered, which I kind of wanted to happen and we would talk about absolutely everything.

Part of me was hoping that you wouldn't answer though. Or even be home for that matter. I got in and out of my car seven times before finally driving to your house, then sat in your driveway for 15 minutes, trying to convince myself to get out of the car and not drive home. By the time I walked up to the porch, I couldn't even remember why I went to your house in the first place.

The door opened and both Melony and your mom were there. "Aubbie!" Melony exclaimed.

"Hey, Mel. Hello Ms. Tammy." I remembered how much your mom hated being called by her last name. She just looked truly puzzled as to why I was at your house, but your sister couldn't have been happier.

"What can I do for you, Aubrey?" Your mom asked.

"Um, well, Jake can't find one of his toys and I was wondering if he left it here." I explained.

"Sorry dear, but Melony and I just cleaned her room and we didn't see anything."

"Oh. Okay. I'm also here to see if Melony wants to go to Build-a-Bear. My way of saying sorry for leaving her party." I put on my best smile, while trying to find any signs of you being home.

"Honey, it's nine o'clock at night." Now your mom seemed really concerned.

"Yeah, Aubbie. It's bedtime." I then realized that Melony was wearing a Sleeping Beauty night gown and holding a blanket.

My mind was so occupied with other things I didn't even realize the sun had been down for hours and stars filled the sky. The moon was full and it reminded me of that night at the drive-in, when we had our first date.

"Um, is Will home?" I asked.

"Yes, bu-" Before your mom could finish, I ran in the house and up the stairs.

Your house still smelled like vanilla and chocolate chip cookies. A weird, but amazing smell. Boxes of Halloween decorations sat at the bottom of the stairs, having just left the attic. Pictures lined the wall of the stairs. There were family ones and school ones of Melony and you. There was even one of Jake and Melony taking a picture with Santa the year before.

Then, at the very top of the stairs, was a picture of you and me at the park. There was snow in our hair and everywhere around us. You could see all the little flakes falling from the sky. We had our big coats on and our cheeks were flushed from the snow. In the distance, you could see the five foot tall snowman that took us hours to build. The picture brought back so many memories. Everything about that picture made me ache. The worst part was that it was a picture of us kissing. One of your hands was tangled in my hair, while I was holding the other one. I had taken the picture with my free hand.

I’m not sure how long I stood there staring. Seconds, minutes, maybe even hours. How long were you standing there watching me? When I noticed your presence, our eyes met and you opened your mouth, but no words came out.

“You kept this up?” I asked, my voice cracking towards the end.

“Well, yeah.” You replied in a why-wouldn't-I tone and with that I smiled and went home.

There wasn’t an emptiness inside me anymore. That was all I wanted when I went to your house. We didn’t talk or make up, but none of that seemed to matter.Love,
Aubrey