Famous Friends

I don't know if you've noticed or not, but, I've got new instructions from my shrink. She recomended that I end any and all journal entries I end up writing about Ryan before they get out of hand and he becomes the main topic. She's noticed that I seem to be stuck, addicted, to his very being. And, I think I am.

I can't say that I'm in love with him, no, not anymore...but...there's just something about him, something I just can't let go of. And, I swear, it'll be the death of me. I mean, Spencer and Zack and everyone-else is doing a pretty good job of distracting me, but, in the back of my mind-in the darkest shadows- those demons, those prestine and perfect memories of being on stage with, on the bus with, sharing a bunk or hotel bed with....it all comes back. It never let's itself lose, but, it makes itself known.